rate_review Reviews

The last line of the chapter really tore my heart. I think your use of simple, plain language both brings out Ran's innate practicality and also makes the tragedy he's witnessing more poignant.

And I love Ran being jealous of Neu, even when he didn't know what it was.

Lovely smut, excellent visuals. I like Aya being the dominant one, but I also liked it when Yohji turned the tables a little. Yohji isn't the only one who needs to learn how to trust. I admire the way you handled the highs and lows of a new relationship - the insecurities and tiny hurts that get blown way out of proportion. The ending, while in character and appropriate, was pure evil, and I'm not sure if you should be proud of yourself for writing such an engaging fic or ashamed for leaving your readers like that.

*gasp* Nooooo! AGH! after they came together he left? *tears hair* Ok, I'm glad I read then when I knew you'd started the sequel... *hurries to start that*

Have I mentioned how awesome you are? "Ran had a powerful urge to just wrap his arms around the man and tell him that it was going to be all right. ... Aya was equally tempted to smack the moron in the head and tell him to snap the hell out of it." I truly love how you catch all the aspects of our beloved bishie.

Yeah, I just wandered in to say something nice. Wasn't re-reading your story or nothing. Doesn't mean anything. :P

damn, but this is hot... If I get nothing done today, I blame you.

This story is simply beautiful!! Heartbreaking!! I love tha way you show their personality and emotions... but please, please, tell me that it not will end here, that there'll be a sequel where Aya look for and found Youji, please!!

are you remus? yea and i like the story...*blinx*
Billie

OOO girl! I'm hoping that there'll be another chapter! You've got the little fishies hooked on the bait all you have to do is reel them in!

I've loved reading this. I looked forward to ever chapter. You're one of the best on the board (or at least I think) and I hope to see more from you in the future! You manage to get into the kittens' minds without twisting them all out of shape. And the addition of Aya-chan as the starting point for this one was great!

I really like this story - However you sorta spooked me....I was reading this on the YxA Yahoo Group then found it here on AFF and for a sec I was thinking someone stole it before I saw your email was the same.

I might recommend if you are going to place the same story in multiple places that you add something to the beginning of your story like 'Archived: This work can be found on AFF.Net, YxA ML, etc' so that readers don't get confused.

All in all, I enjoyed it - It was a very well written story.

Only thing I noticed is that your formatting is way off here on Chapter 9 its *really* wide. You may wanna check that out...It was a little wide on the Group too, so I dunno.

Keep up the great work!

Apollo
Co-Owner
Adult Fan Fiction.Net

nice ending! very surprising and kept me wanting to read!
come on... your gonna continue this, right?