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August 5, 2010 at 12:00 AM
like where this is going. I would like to see more....
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March 24, 2010 at 12:00 AM
This was really good. A few typos here and there, but nothing major to complain about. Asuka turning the tables on him is very, well, Asuka. I really hope you continue. I think this story could go places.
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March 22, 2010 at 12:00 AM
wont mind seeing this concept being continued.
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March 22, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Good going. I would like to see it continue, but this is certainly a good place to stop at if any. I think you've just written the most erotic eating of an egg I've ever seen.
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March 22, 2010 at 12:00 AM
While I'm not a fan at all of the ending, I can understand exactly why you ended it, and why you ended it the exact way you did.
Naturally, due to my love of corruption and depravity, I would have much rather have seen Asuka secretly enjoying what Shinji was doing, and finally catching him in the act, insist he spread his 'seed' to the other girls of the group, but I suppose that would have been harder to work on.
Naturally, due to my love of corruption and depravity, I would have much rather have seen Asuka secretly enjoying what Shinji was doing, and finally catching him in the act, insist he spread his 'seed' to the other girls of the group, but I suppose that would have been harder to work on.
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March 21, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I really like most of your stories but this...not sexy. I could see it as a scene in a story with other acts, but as the whole point I think someone would have to have this fetish to think it's worth a story.
SailorNemesis
SailorNemesis
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March 21, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I really liked this, actually. Not only was it believable and amusing, but it could have really gone somewhere. You should run with this – Shinji gets so caught up in his revenge plots, that he gets a little overboard. Asuka (or whomever you'd prefer) catches onto what he's doing, and hilarity or sexual shenanigans occur.
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March 20, 2010 at 12:00 AM
This an interesting idea
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March 19, 2010 at 12:00 AM
It doesn't seem to follow the characters. Asuka constantly wants to kill an angel before Shinji, he's never shown embarrassment before. Also I can't figure out why they would be laughing. If anything they generally don't seem to like the idea of Asuka ignoring orders.
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March 19, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Short, but sweet. I love the ideas you had for later on. A willing Asuka screams of awesome, even more so if she somehow manages to start getting off on the idea overall. I could see Misato knowing what the 'Additive' is, but going along with it normally, whereas Rei would probably be more confused or the like. Overall though, I still want more. You're quickly rising as a favorite of mine fic wise, though I don't always comment.