Second Beginnings

note: italics = thoughts

\"Let\'s go out tonight!\" said JJ over the phone. \"I\'ll come pick you up.\"
\"What would Drake say?\" asked Ryo.
\"He has to work tonight. Besides, he told me to make sure you go out more.\"
\"I feel perfectly fine with how I spend my evenings.\"
\"Come on!!! It\'ll be fun! We\'ll go out for drinks. I\'ll vicariously check out the cuties-\"
\"I don\'t want you trying to set me up again.\"
\"I\'m coming over.\"
\"No, don\'t-\"
*Click
Damn it. Ryo hung up the phone and sighed. Everyone keeps on trying to set me up again and I\'m just not interested! It has been over twenty years since Dee had passed away. Since then, Ryo had been with absolutely no one else. It hasn\'t been due to lack of offers. Now in his early forties, Ryo kept up his youthful appearance. Age had barely touched him, his boyish qualities still in tact. If anything, time had made him more handsome, his features more chiseled, the crinkles around his eyes making him seem worldly and wise. His body remained lithe and graceful yet undeniably masculine and strong at the same time. Ryo still went to the gym regularly and had started to do yoga. He was now at his physical peak. Everyone could see that, except for Ryo. Both men and women, young and old went after Ryo with no avail. He had tried to go out once or twice, but always came to the same conclusion. He knew what he had with Dee was true love. It was the best thing that had ever happened to him. How do you compare with that? Every time he was with someone else, he just thought about Dee, how he wished he could be with Dee instead. He couldn\'t be in a relationship with someone if all his thoughts were spent pining for someone else. That wasn\'t a real relationship. That wouldn\'t be fair to him, to Dee, and most of all it wouldn\'t be fair to the other person.

There was a knock at the door. Ryo opened the door. JJ came galloping in.
\"Alright, let\'s go!\" JJ eyed Ryo who was wearing sweats and a t-shirt. \"On second thought, let\'s get you dressed\".
JJ dragged Ryo to the bedroom and started rummaging through his closet. He kept on putting outfits together until he found the perfect one.
\"Try this on!\"
\"JJ, you know I don\'t want to go out.\"
\"Why? Do you not want to have a nice dinner, some tasty drinks, see the lovely sites New York have to offer? Is that so horrible?\"
\"No, it\'s not that. I\'m not interested in dating again.\"
\"It\'s been over two decades!! That\'s a generation right there. You need to move on with your life\"
\"So? I have moved on. I\'m just not interested.\"
\"Ryo, I know you still love Dee. Being with someone else won\'t change that. He would have wanted you to-\"
Ryo sighed. \"Maybe…I don\'t know. It\'s just so hard\".
\"I know it is….Here, let\'s just go out on the town, have some fun. I won\'t worry about finding you a little cutie\"
\"Fine. Give me those clothes.\"
JJ smiled and handed the outfit over. Ryo took them. JJ just stood there waiting. Ryo stared at JJ, waiting for him to leave the room.
\"What?\" JJ asked.
\"I\'m not going to…with you right there.\"
\"Fine! I\'ll go outside.\" JJ walked through the door. \"But it\' s not like it\'s anything I haven\'t seen before!\".
Ryo got dressed and walked out to meet JJ.
\"Woo hoo! Why don\'t we look sophisticated here…\"
\"Let\'s just go\"

Ryo and JJ had gone to an Italian restaurant for dinner. Afterwards, they went to one of JJ\'s favorite bars for drinks. They sat at the bar chatting. Jazz was playing in the background. JJ had gone up to go to the restroom. Ryo stayed at the bar and looked around. He found himself looking at one man in particular. He was young, in his twenties. He was tall and very handsome. His body was lean and muscular. He was also well-dressed. His face seemed playful.

JJ came back.
\"Who are you looking at?\"
\"What?\" Ryo turned to JJ.
\"You\'re totally staring at that guy. He\'s pretty hot. It looks like he\'s staring at you too!\"
Ryo looked back at the man who indeed was staring back at him. His eyes were dark and penetrating. They seemed to look through Ryo right to his soul, that made him want to squirm, made him want to run away. It was a feeling that was all too familiar. Ryo broke free from his gaze and turned to JJ.
\"JJ, let\'s go-\" as Ryo said that JJ had already stood up and went to talk to an old friend whom he saw just walk in. Ryo sank back into his stool. He leaves just when I needed him too. The man he was staring at was walking his way! There was no way to hide, he was so close. The man sat on the stool JJ had been sitting in.
\"Hey.\"
\"Hey\" replied Ryo nervously. He tried to avoid eye contact.
\"Can I buy you a drink?\"
\"Um…er…\" Ryo had no idea what to do or to say.
The man laughed. \"I think the way it works is that you either say yes or no.\"
\"Y-yes.\" I definitely need it.
\"Hey bartender, can I get a drink for my friend here?\"
The bartender turned around and looked at Ryo.
\"Sure. What can I get you?\"
\"Um…uh….er…\"
The bartender looked annoyed.
\"How about some warm sake? For the both of us.\" Asked the man.
\"Right away\"
\"I\'m sorry I ordered for you. You didn\'t seem like you were making much process.\"
\"I\'m sorry…I kind of get that way sometimes…shy…awkward, you name it.\"
\"I kinda like it. It\'s cute\" The man flashed Ryo a smile. Ryo felt his knees go weak.
\"Do you like sake?\" asked the man.
\"I love it. I\'m half Japanese so my parents and relatives always drank it at family functions. It reminds me of them.\"
The bartender came out with the drinks.
\"You seem more like the whiskey type to me\" said Ryo.
\"I do love a good whiskey. Good anything, actually,\" said the man. \"But, I think like you, I have a warm spot in my heart for whiskey.\"
\"What is it?\" asked Ryo.
\"Someone I loved- well actually I still love him- he use to drink sake a lot.\"
They sat in silence, sipping at their drinks.
\"Ryo.\" The man sighed. Ryo\'s ears perked up, his eyes widened.
\"How do you know-\"
\"Don\'t you recognize me?\"
Ryo shook his head.
The man laughed. \"I forget things are different now. When I see you, I feel all the same things again but I guess it wouldn\'t be the same for you. Look at my eyes, Ryo.\"
The man looked at Ryo with the same penetrating gaze that made Ryo shiver. He did recognize that stare.
\"It can\'t be-\"
\"I\'ve missed you.\"
Ryo had to look away. He saw JJ coming back. He stood up.
\"JJ! Great to see you. Let\'s go!\"
JJ was taken aback. \"I guess if you want to.\"
\"Let\'s.\" Ryo picked up his own coat, and gave JJ\'s his.
Ryo turned to the man, refusing to return his gaze. \"Um, nice to meet you. I have to go with my fried. Goodbye\".
He turned to leave. The man held his arm to stop him. He was right behind Ryo. He whispered in his ear, \"Don\'t say goodbye. This is not the end.\"
Ryo froze.
\"Come on Ryo!\" JJ said.
Ryo snapped back to reality. He left with JJ, refusing to turn around, afraid of what would happen if he had another glimpse of the man.

Ryo sat alone in his apartment. He couldn\'t stop thinking about the man at the bar. He tried watching TV, he tried reading but nothing worked. What just happened? Who was he? Ryo didn\'t know what to do. He tried to think about Dee instead, but thoughts about the other man always came up. At the same time, every time he thought about the other man, he thought about Dee as well. It seemed like he couldn\'t separate the two of them. He went to the bedroom, deciding to give sleep a try. For what seemed like hours, Ryo tried to sleep without much success. He tried again to concentrate his thoughts on Dee. His eyes, his chest, his arms touching me, caressing me…Ryo pulled his pajama pants down and began fondling his growing erection. Dee…your lips…He slipped his arm under his shirt, and began caressing his nipples, imagining it was Dee touching him. Ryo moved his hand up and down his shaft, gently at first but now it moved with urgency. He imagined himself on his back with Dee thrusting deep inside him, hitting that spot within him. Dee would kiss me and touch me while he…He felt his orgasm coming soon. All of a sudden in Ryo\'s fantasy, the person thrusting inside him, giving him all this pleasure was the man from the bar. He was too close now to stop. With a silent scream, he came intensely, his seed spilling over his hands. Gasping, he collapsed on to the bed. I can\'t believe that just happened. I wanted to stop thinking about him and I end up cumming to the thought of him. He covered himself with blankets. He began drifting off to sleep. At least I won\'t have to see him again.