Bobbing for Apples

The first thing that occurred to Light when he woke up is that his ass hurt. The second thing he noticed was that L was no longer snuggled up next to him. His eyes flashed open and somhow that jogged his memory at every single event that had occurred before he had fallen asleep. He looked around hesitantly, finding a folded pile of clothes that were not his own but still his style and in the back of his mind where his went. The shocking thing, however, is the fact that his Death Note was on top of it. He suddenly remembered forgetting the Death Note in the hall and would have been angry at L, accusing him of doing that on purpose. That is, he would have if it wasn\'t right here in front of him and L is the only person who could have possibly put it there. Right now all he could manage was overwhelming curiosity. He resisted the urge to run and find L right now, while he was naked, and went to take a shower. Followed by getting dressed slowly. He wanted to act calm at all times. Anyways, L could be watching him right now. Maintaining his self control, he took the Death Note with him as he casually looked for L.



This proved to be more difficult than he thought. Not only was he trying to keep his cool but this became more trying with every moment he didn\'t find L. And he couldn\'t seem to find the detective anywhere. After an hour of searching everywhere he had already seen, he moved on to other rooms he had yet to venture into. He soon found that this house was much bigger than originally expected. Finally, he found L in a room. He walked up the door silently as to not have L hear him and looked inside of it. It was a nursery. Well, if you could consider something this luxurious as a simple nursery. It really looked more like a lounge that just so happened to have a matching crib in it. There were no toys, nothing in soft baby blues or pinks. In fact, most things were white or navy with black accents. It was simple, but elegant. Everything doused in the most expensive of things. The changing table had granite topping, for god\'s sake. L was facing away from him, sitting on an ottoman at the other side of the room. He was in his normal sitting position and looking downward at something. For a moment, Light thought it might be his Death Note and something in Light panicked. He tried to quietly sneak up behind L, hoping to stop him if L was going to decide to write his name on it. That would be pretty low for L, given the fact that we just fucked... But he was wrong and soon saw that it wasn\'t the Death Note. He tried to start walking backwards, I\'ll walk in a normal way, I might be interrupting something and if it\'s no threat to my life, I shouldn\'t intrude... One step backwards he thought went successfully.



However, L said "You found me." Light froze, immediately noticing it was the same thing he said in the library. L relieved him of the need to explain himself by carrying on. "It\'s a picture of me when I was two. Want to see?" Light nodded, thinking that if he denied anything right now, it would be even more rude. The younger man grasped the picture frame and looked down at it.



This can\'t be L... He thought immediately. This boy had a bowl-cut that didn\'t seem to want to stay in place. He was sitting on a stool, in a normal fashion no less, smiling up at the camera. The dark bags under his eyes didn\'t exist and his posture was wonderful. Actually, the fact that his eyes were black and he was holding an oversized lollipop were really the only idications that he was L. He was dressed entirely in black. Light let it soak for a moment before letting his eyes move back up to L and contrasting them. What happened? Perhaps the most changed thing is that there was an absolutely huge smile across little L\'s face where there now is something akin to apathy. He realized that in the bedroom, he had seen the most emotion out of him and though his ass still stung a little, he was grateful. He realized he was staring at the real L and shook his head, returning the picture with a smile on his face. Actually, it was more of a smirk. He came around L and kissed his neck for a moment, looking at the picture over L\'s shoulder "You obviously never grew out of being a brat."



"What do you mean?" He looked shocked before looking down at the picture as if he had no idea that it indicated he had been spoiled as a child. He made no attempt to deny his current snottiness.



Kira kissed again on his neck while remembering what he came here for. "L?" He was granted a small noise of acknowledgment. "Why did you give me back the Death Note?" As he said it, he held it up with one hand though L couldn\'t see it behind his back.



L\'s breathing slowed. "Because you\'re already unable to hurt anyone in this situation. I want you to give up the power by yourself. I want you to choose to no longer be Kira. Because I just take it from you..." He paused, as if to rearrange his words in the right order so they came out to mean the correct statement. "Then you wouldn\'t learn anything." That ending part of the statement was very anti-climatic and Light got the hunch that L wasn\'t telling the whole truth. His curiosity was unsatisfied. He kissed again, indicating for L to go on. "\'Forcing you to no longer have that power may unravel your mind." L said bluntly.



Light backed away and L turned his head to look at him. "You think I\'m insane?"



L was trying to carefully phrase his words. "I think that something mindblowing has happened to you and therefor your psyche has indeed been affected. Much in the way someone who sees something traumatic happen, like someone close being murdered--"



"Your comparing me to Misa?!" The accused cringed visibly. "You\'re comparing my mind to fucking Misa\'s?" Anger swelled in his chest. He was somehow standing over L, completely lost in rage.



"No." L began bravely. "Your mind is much more capable than Amane Misa\'s." He nibbled on his thumb for a moment, staring up at Light. "But I\'m saying that the affect on your psyche is drastic." This didn\'t seem to stop Light from being completely engulfed in hatred. He\'s still saying I\'m loony! "That is not to say, however, that you have no control over your actions. You are still guilty of your crimes and your mind has cleverly knotted its way in the most astonishing way. I just believe your outlook on yourself has changed. I think you have the same ideals as you did before - the same thoughts of justice. Now, though, I think something dangerous is added..."



He couldn\'t help it, he had to ask. "And what is that?"



"Your pride. Now you consider yourself above all other people because they lay at your feet. However, it takes more than fear grubbing to make someone follow you in the long run." When, exactly, did L get that candy he just popped into his mouth? "It takes compassion to be a leader. Your perfect world you see isn\'t perfect if everyone in it except you simply acts out of fear. You consider yourself immortal and this is a dreadful error. For instance, I can kill you right now." Ryuk laughed somewhere and Light jumped, having forgotten all about him.



"I do this out of compassion for the world! I am saving them, I am risking my own soul!" He was yelling for no reason and he knew it but he continued. "I am a martyr, a hero, a God!"



There was silence. "Will you kill me?"



Light didn\'t move for far too long. L might have thought he saw his warm eyes darken and become wet. "Yes, if you continue to stand in my way, I will have to."



L didn\'t look phased. "Will you feel bad about it?"



Light couldn\'t stand it much longer. There was something empty in him when thinking about something that morbid. "You could rule the world with me! We\'d be the best team... We\'d be equals..."



"That is not what I asked, Yagami-kun." Once again, the name put distance between them. "Will your murdering of me make you feel bad?"



"... Yes, I think so..." Again, L refused to react with his body.



"Why?" This was not something Light expected and he stepped back for a moment.



"Because it\'d be a waste! You\'re so intelligent, you\'re the only person that holds a candle to me - that is equal to my mind!" I would miss you... "Because you don\'t deserve to die!"



\'But I do if I stand in your way?"



"Well..." Does he? He\'s standing up for justice the same way I am... Our justice is just different. If he stands in the way of my justice, he is the enemy. So yes... But, does he? "Anyone who not a criminal does not necessarily deserve to die. However, it may be needed for the betterment of the world."



"I see. Did you feel guilt over the FBI agents?"



"No, of course not, they..."



"Light." Light jerked, noticing he was staring at the ground. L was close to him, standing against him in his crouching way. Warm hands took his own and he wanted to look away but ended up looking into those dark eyes. "Anyone who was not corrupted with power would at least feel guilt for killing people that did not deserve it, even if it was necessary." A soft kiss on his forehead. "Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men."



Light was vaguely aware that he was blushing from all this affectionate attention. He\'d had sex before, he\'d been close... But this was different. He suddenly had the concept that perhaps he wasn\'t hugged enough as a child because all this softness made him uncomfortable. The warmth went to his brain and seemed to have fried it. "You\'re not bad..."



That pale head wreathed in black tilted as L stepped away. Smokey eyes stayed on him. "I, Light-kun, am perhaps the worst of all men..." But he wouldn\'t say any more and though Light was aggravated by this, he was grateful to no longer have his ideals pounded at.



--



Fufa\'s Notes:



Smallish chapter but it was a nice place to cut it off. Next one will go deep into each of their minds. They both have a lot to think about right now.



I might get distracted. I am seriously angry that I have yet to find a Mello rapes Near story. ;_; I may just have to write one. The funny thing is... I\'m really not interested in anyone but L but Light makes the best pairing for a lot of reasons that I won\'t bore you with. And I absolutely deplore Mello x Near slash that\'s all lovey and shit. Somehow, though, I could see Mello raping Near. AND I WANT TO SEE IT, DAMNIT.



/END STUPIDITY (temporarily)