Coup d'�tat

November 3rd, 2022 a.t.b.

Sometime around two in the morning, Kallen shuffled out of the bathroom of the moderately opulent suite she shared with Kaguya. As a part of the security detail, she was supposed to stick close to her charge, but Kaguya had told her that Lelouch would probably have the security wrapped up tighter than a fly’s arsehole, pardon her French. Knowing Lelouch, she was probably right.

The suite was large enough for Kallen to have her own bedroom and bathroom. It reminded her of her father’s mansion with its high ceilings and wide windows--alien and familiar all at once. She attributed her restlessness to the excitement of Japan’s impending independence and the strangeness of the surroundings. A cramped berth on the Ikaruga or a shared room in one of their safe houses had been the norm for her. She could even nap in the Guren if she had to.

But it was all changing. She had been discussing about getting a flat with her mother--

A tap at the balcony doors drew her out of her thoughts. Kallen could see C.C. through the glass.

“I saw the light in your room,” she said by way of explanation when Kallen opened the door to let her in. The green-haired woman surveyed the room and headed for the bed, flopping down on the covers. Arthur followed on her heels, sniffing the edges of the sheets critically before settling on a pillow.

“Make yourself at home,” Kallen joked. “Don’t you have your own bed to go back to?”

“Maybe I don’t want to sleep in it.”

“You didn’t even bring your stuffed thingy--”

“You didn’t like Cheese-kun,” C.C. said.

“Well, yeah--back when we were crashing in safe-houses, I used to wake up and see that thing in front of my face--”

“--and you’d scream,” C.C. finished. “That’s why I didn’t bring him.”

“Oh,” Kallen said. She was not really up to puzzling her way through C.C.’s cryptic statements at this time of the night. “Uh, so if you’re going to stay--”

“The bed is big enough for two,” C.C. said, shifting to one side.

“Oh.”

There had been a time, when C.C. had been attached to the Black Knights after the events of the SAZ. Attached specifically to Kallen while she had been in hiding. It had been a confusing, terrifying time as they faced pursuit and capture at every turn. Not as glamorous as it sounded.

But Kallen had learned one thing that she was sure even Suzaku did not know. C.C. did not actually like to sleep alone. Cheese-kun was a substitute for the warmth of a flesh and blood companion.

The second thing was . . . C.C. seldom made allowances for anyone.

“Hey, are you going to sleep?” Kallen asked, reaching down to touch a strand of vibrant green hair. C.C. did not move away, so that was a good sign. Emboldened, she stroked the soft skin of the other woman’s neck.

“Are you sure?” C.C.’s large golden eyes blinked slowly at her as she leaned into Kallen’s hand.

Kallen shucked off her oversized nightshirt. “I wasn’t sleepy anyway.”

* * * * * * * * * * * *

May 23rd, 2017 a.t.b.

It was not what she expected.

Kallen had accompanied the other student, Lelouch, back to the Settlement as she was due to return home. There was another reason--Ougi and the others needed her to keep an eye on him. The boy was . . . either an incredible find or an incredible liability.

She still remembered how her hands had been shaking while clamped around the stock of the military-issued rifle. The prince--Clovis--had died with an expression of utter bewilderment mingled with fear. Killed by his own brother.

Half-brother. Also a prince and her classmate.

Who had calmly holstered his gun and gone around to the back of the dais. Ougi managed to move and gingerly approached the body of the Viceroy. He did not touch the corpse but the look he gave her when he raised his head told Kallen that it was real. The Viceroy was dead.

The boy that Kallen had only vaguely known as Vice-President of the Student Council had been bustling around the back wall behind the dais and with a soft exclamation of satisfaction, he did something and a portion of the decking slid aside. There were always secret exits in vehicles or crafts carrying royalty, he had told them casually. In case of emergencies and the odd assassination attempt.

The irony of it all did not escape her as they slipped down into the hole in the decking. It led to a hatch on the underside of the mobile command centre. Once outside, there had been a sewer grate not three metres away. Moments later, they had lifted the grate and were running down the sewers to rendezvous with Tamaki and the others.

It had been almost unreal. They had got away with it so easily. A victory like this should not have been so . . . easy.

But it had not been easy. It had not been cheap. The ghetto inhabitants had paid the price in blood. Kallen had lost her brother in the struggle for independence two years ago. Fighting a losing war was not easy. And yet this boy who was barely older than she was had stepped in and made it look almost effortless.

They had been so focused on their escape that it was only much later that they realised that the green-haired girl had slipped away sometime during their flight. Lelouch had been somewhat put out by the sole factor in his plans that he could not control. In the end, Ougi has said that they would keep an eye out for her. If she was an escapee from some hush-hush experiment, well, then all the better to discredit the now-dead prince with.

It was unnerving, how the boy could talk like that after killing his brother. Half brother. Lelouch Lamperouge--vi Britannia--had the ruthlessness that they lacked. That fact alone was galling. She had lost Naoto to the Britannians, and yet . . .

What had that boy lost to inspire so much hatred?

Which was why it was both surprising and not so surprising when he led her back to Ashford Academy where his sister was waiting for him.

“It’s pointless to hide since you know who I am already,” he had said on the way back, looking like normal Britannian students in their uniforms. Kallen had flushed, wondering if their intentions had been that obvious from the start.

She had not expected the blind girl in the wheelchair. But she should have, from what she had heard that day. People had reasons to fight. For some, it was for the ideal of nationhood, for others, a sister and a mother.

Nunnally had asked her to stay for supper. Feeling very much like an intruder, Kallen had declined, giving the excuse that she had to get back home before her curfew ended at eleven. As though her step-mother had any say in what she did.

She reported to Ougi and the others before going home to her father’s house. There would be much to discuss before they would accept the rest of what Lelouch had proposed.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

May 23rd, 2017 a.t.b.

Lelouch knew that they were still wary of him. Which was why he had shown Kallen and Ougi what he was capable of. Who he really was and what he was willing to do.

They thought he did not understand Japanese. Jabbering away at top speed, they had argued amongst themselves for the longest time about the need to take risks. Lelouch had learned the language when he was ten and he never lost the ear for it. There had been a name mentioned more than twice by both Kallen and Ougi--Naoto. A relative or a loved one? He was obviously important to the two of them and because he had died fighting the Britannians, they continued to honour his cause.

At Ashford, Kallen’s eyes had softened noticeably when she had been introduced to Nunnally. An older brother then. He had made progress with her. Kallen would understand the need for revenge and the desire to protect what was important. He did not need to lie in order to be believable. Now he had to rope them in with incentives . . .

Kallen had excused herself after picking up copies of the homework that she had presumably came for. They would be contacting him soon, giving him time to work out the kinks in his proposal.

“Was that your girlfriend, brother?” Nunnally asked after Kallen had left and they had sat down to their supper.

“Well, no,” Lelouch said, caught off guard. “Just a classmate from school. She missed a lot of work, so I was just passing it to her.”

“If you say so, brother. It’s nice to meet more of your friends.”

Lelouch looked fondly at his sister. “It’s not as though I’m a recluse, you know? Have some more asparagus.”

“Mmm, but . . .” Nunnally hesitated for a second, her fork halting halfway to her mouth. “It’s not the same . . .”

“Not the same as what?”

“It’s not the same as the kind of friendship that you had with Suzaku.” Nunnally turned her head towards him as the sound of cutlery on bone china ceased abruptly. “I’m sorry, brother, I didn’t mean to upset you by--”

“It’s nothing,” Lelouch gasped. “J-just choked on something--excuse me--”

“Are you all right?”

Brushing past a concerned Sayoko, he hurried to the bathroom as the events of that impossibly long day came back to him in a rush.

Clovis--Suzaku--

Lelouch only just made it to the bathroom before his stomach forcibly rejected the fillet of sole and fresh greens that Sayoko had prepared.

Bent over the toilet, Lelouch took a deep breath to steady himself as the remains of his dinner were flushed away.

His first kill.

He would not justify it by saying that Clovis had it coming. Clovis was a message. Clovis was the symbol of how far he was willing to go. If it had been one of them, one of his many siblings who had engineered his mother’s death, the ties of blood would not hold him back.

And if he had the chance to save Suzaku, he would have done it all over again without hesitation. Pulled the trigger and damned himself all over again.

Washing his hands in the sink, Lelouch tried to blank his mind so that the enormity of his self-appointed quest did not overwhelm him.

He had just started a war. Against that man. Against the Emperor and the might of the Britannian Empire.

The tremors that caused his hands to shake soon faded and he was almost ready to go back to the table. There would be more deaths on his hands soon. He had no doubt that that resistance cell would contact him. Fortunately, he thought as he dried his hands, the next day was Saturday--there would be time for him to regroup before facing them again.

As things stood, he had already committed himself. There could be no turning back now.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

May 24th, 2017, a.t.b.

The world was a haze of pain and darkness when he was semi-conscious. When he was under the anaesthetic, there was just darkness. The anaesthetic . . . was helpful.

The one other side effect of the Geass was painfully accelerated healing. It was as though it showed his body the quickest shortcut to mend itself and his cells tried to follow the directions in a thoroughly slavish manner. Humans were not supposed to regenerate cells and re-grow bones at that speed. Suzaku had learned this the hard way when he had broken his ankle on a school field trip at age eleven. Everyone thought he had sprained his ankle by the end of the day because his bones had knitted together by then. He had been trying not to yell throughout the whole ordeal because it had been excruciating.

Suzaku had asked C.C. how she dealt with it when she came back from death on a regular basis. She told him that blacking out helped a lot.

The witch was no stranger to near death experiences. It was all pretty new to him though. Blacking out really helped when his ribs knitted.

Floating weightless and adrift in the limbo of his own subconsciousness, Suzaku knew he had something to do. Something important. So he had to wake up--

Wake up.

He opened his eyes. A familiar room. His father’s study. The place of his memories was not a comforting place. He did not like to return to it, but it was one of the ways C.C. could contact him. It was how she kept an eye on him most of the time while he was in the military--a compromise he had accepted because of their compact.

You’re alive. The witch was perched on the sofa by his head.

What day is it? And where am I now? He sat up, wincing from the remembered pain of his injuries.

It’s been one day since you were shot. And you’re in the Merton Base Military Hospital.

Lelouch? Did he--

He made it out after killing his brother. And I’m fine, thanks for asking.

Suzaku was in no mood to banter. He got up and started to pace. It was done then. The chain of events had been set in motion.

She watched him idly from her perch. Are you upset? Angry? Worried?

I didn’t want any of this to happen. He had to avoid the bloodstain on the floor.

You didn’t let it happen. Don’t blame yourself for things outside your control.

I don’t want to fight him, C.C.--he was my best friend.

Was, huh? The witch looked speculatively at him. Are your goals so different?

He wants to destroy the Empire, C.C., and I’m afraid he will do anything to achieve it. Regardless of the cost.

Hmmmm . . . Cocking her head to one side, C.C. pretended to think.That doesn’t sound like anyone else I know at all . . .

I didn’t say I wanted to destroy the Empire--

You might as well be. The Britannians won’t let go of all that Sakuradite without a fight.

Which was why he had thought of getting a foothold in the system in order to work his way up to a point when he could actually change Britannian policies regarding Area 11. But he was too slow. With Clovis’ death, a new Viceroy would be appointed. It did not bode well for the native resistance and the Japanese in general. The events of the previous day had set off something much too big to be contained. And Lelouch was right in the middle of it

C.C., could you do me a favour?

She sighed after he told her what he wanted her to do. You know you already owe me a lot of pizza.

So you’ll do it then?

* * * * * * * * * * * *

May 25th, 2017 a.t.b.

Lelouch allowed himself to wake up exactly one hour later on Saturday morning. It had been a tiring Friday and he would need to be focused if he was to put his plans into action.

Said plans were abruptly derailed when he went for breakfast. Sayoko always reliably made breakfast for himself and Nunnally before going for her day off. Weekends were usually stay-at-home days for the Lamperouge siblings.

But that morning, there was someone else at the dining table with Nunnally.

“Good morning, brother,” Nunnally said enthusiastically. “This is C.C.--she came by to give us news! You won’t believe this, but she’s Suzaku’s friend and he asked her to find us--”

Taken back by surprise, Lelouch stared at the green-haired woman from the previous day. She stared back, sipping Earl Grey from her tea cup as though there was nothing amiss.

“But--but how--look here,” Lelouch said, rapidly trying to sort all of this new information out. Nunnally should not have let a stranger in so easily. “I don’t know who you are, but how do we know you are who you--”

“You used to play in a small cave when you were ten years old. Your secret base,” she said.

“How do you know that?” Lelouch blurted out.

“Suzaku tells me everything. I’m his most important person,” the woman informed him without batting an eyelash.

Then the most pertinent fact occurred to him. “But Suzaku is--”

“Hospitalised at the moment. An accident, they’re calling it.” The woman called C.C. was watching his reaction very carefully. “Friendly-fire, I believe is the term in the military.”

Of course they would call it that. But that meant that Suzaku was alive--

“He’s on the mend, but I thought it would be best if you knew about it. He doesn’t have any close friends or relatives . . . here in Tokyo.”

No, his kin would not have approved of him becoming a soldier in the Britannian military--which meant that Suzaku had opted to become an Honorary Britannian first. The Kururugi clan would never have stood for that.

“That’s terrible,” Nunnally said. “I know we’re in--I mean, should we go visit him?”

“Suzaku has told me about your . . . situation. You shouldn’t do things that would put your cover at risk,” C.C. said. “Maybe he’ll come visit you when he’s discharged . . .”

“Suzaku told you a lot of things.” Lelouch was feeling out of his depth and seriously discomfited by that woman’s stare. It was . . . not something he was accustomed to.

“Of course--I am more than a friend,” C.C. said. “We have made a pact with each other. I won’t leave his side.”

“Oh I’m so happy for Suzaku! Isn’t it nice that Suzaku has found his special person?” Nunnally exclaimed. “And she came all this way to find us too.”

The emotion Lelouch was feeling at that moment was not exactly jubilation. He was glad that Suzaku was all right, but this--

“Indeed, I apologise for doubting you, but we have to be careful. For instance, Ms C.C., how did you find us?” Lelouch asked.

“My brother is a little paranoid,” Nunnally said to their visitor. “I hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all. I understand the need for secrecy. Please call me C.C. and dispense with the formalities. We can discuss this in further detail if you wish.”

“Privately? Certainly. Nunnally, please excuse me, I’m going to borrow your guest for a moment . . .”

“All right, brother, but you’ve got to make sure she eats some more of the pancakes Sayoko made afterwards.”

Nodding and assuring his sister that he would be a good host, Lelouch steered C.C. out of the dining room and into his bedroom.

“My, so forward,” the woman said as he locked the door. “Do you always bring girls into your bedroom five minutes after meeting them?”

“That’s not relevant! Now explain to me just what is going on,” Lelouch demanded. He was pissed off enough that her innuendos did not rattle him.

“Say please.” She laughed at his expression. “Suzaku was right about you. You lose all your manners whenever you get flustered.”

“Who are you and what you--”

“I am C.C. and that’s all you need to know. I’m not going to expose you and I really am Suzaku’s accomplice.”

“Accomplice in what?”

“Ah, for that, you need to ask him yourself,” C.C. said in a maddeningly casual tone. “I am just a messenger. And I do need a place to stay until Suzaku gets out of the hospital.”

“Why do you--oh.” If she was fleeing from the Britannians, she could hardly hang out at the military hospital where Suzaku was. But what was her relationship with Suzaku? And what did the Britannians want with her? The only way he could find out, Lelouch realised with growing dismay, was to let her stay with them.

But Suzaku was alive. That was the important thing. Suzaku was alive and there was a mysterious woman who was both connected to him and the research Clovis had been doing. He could handle this. He would get to the bottom of this and put in motion his plans for that rag-tag resistance group.

“Nunnally, guess what? C.C. will be our guest for the next few days,” Lelouch said afterwards with the cheerfulness he did not actually feel. He hated lying to his sister, but this was for her protection at once. They were at risk of exposure now because of that woman.

“Oh that’s wonderful!”

“But she didn’t bring any luggage. Can she borrow some of your clothes? You are almost the same size and with some alterations, it might work.” That woman was still in the white restraining suit from yesterday. It would raise too many difficult questions, Lelouch knew.

“Of course! Come with me, C.C.!”

* * * * * * * * * * * *

May 26th, 2017 a.t.b.

Lelouch gave the resistance group a maximum of three or four days. They replied in two and a half.

“Meet us at the appointed location and time,” Kallen whispered in passing as she slipped him a note while passing him a stack of notes in class.

Tucking the note away while pretending to pay her no mind, Lelouch knew that it was only a matter of time. He would bait the hook and wait. It was good that at least one thing was going his way.

That woman--C.C.--was lying low at home. Nunnally thought she had a new friend, but that woman had a way of deflecting questions or simply not answering. Lelouch would rather not make any assumptions so soon when they essentially knew nothing about her. What he had to do was to find Suzaku and get the truth out of him. Suzaku had never been good at lying.

But first, there were things he had to do . . .

* * * * * * * * * * * *

In the space between dreams, she came to him again in the place where the past intersected with the possible future.

Hey, your friend sews. Or just does good alterations. C.C. pirouetted, pleated skirt flaring out around her hips. She was wearing a very smart white blouse with a red and black plaid skirt. It was not real--only her physical memory of her clothes. He also cooks. Rather well, actually.

Yes, Lelouch could do all of that. Or he had learned to do so with a greater degree of skill than his ten-year self. Survival skills gleaned from taking care of Nunnally all these years. At least that had not changed.

So you’ve met him--

I’m staying at his place. It’s nicer than the last room I had in the ghetto, and the that pokey room above the old warehouse . . . C.C. had made her own arrangements when he was with the military, a fact she pointed out to him whenever she wanted pizza.

So you’ve found someone new to sponge off. Suzaku honestly felt sorry for Lelouch. C.C. could be extremely . . . hard to maintain when she was freeloading. Does that mean you won’t be bothering me anymore?

What? After I told them I was your most important person? C.C. tossed her head airily. After sharing everything with me for all these years?

You told them what? Suzaku looked up in alarm. You’re going to give them the wrong idea--

What? That we were lovers? That’s not very far away from the truth, isn’t it? C.C. smiled at him mischievously. And it goes deeper than that, doesn’t it?

You didn’t tell them about that as well! Suzaku almost choked--figuratively--on the very idea of C.C. sitting down to tea with Lelouch and Nunnally, casually discussing every intimate detail of his life. It had been a bad idea to entrust the witch with this after all--

Am I not the only reason that you’re alive? She was no longer smiling.

Their contract was a far more binding than a simple promise, he knew. His life was no longer his to throw away. They did not talk about that very often, if at all.

Aa, that’s true. But you didn’t have to tell them that much--

Your friend already thinks I’m hiding something from him. I had to tell them something so that he would let me stay or even talk to his sister. All the better to watch them. That had been the favour he had asked of her. She had wrangled herself into the best position to observe Lelouch and Nunnally.

Suzaku admitted that she had done her best. All right then. So what is going on?

Nothing yet. He’s planning . . . something. His primary contact with the resistance group is a girl from his class C.C. reported, ticking the points off her fingers idly. He knows you’re alive and he’s been trying to pry information out of me.

Good luck to him. He’s . . . Is he all right?

If you meant to ask if he’s healthy and unhurt, then yes, he’s fine. He could stand to eat a little more, but that would be a waste if he throws up every time after a kill. C.C. knew what he had been looking for. Some sign that the old Lelouch was still there.

Suzaku did not realise that he had been holding his metaphorical breath until that moment. That much had not changed. Lelouch was still fiercely protective of Nunnally. And a part of him was still that prince from seven years ago who flinched at the very idea of killing caterpillars.

It still did not change the fact that he had killed his half brother.

This is just a guess, but I think he will try to find you again C.C. said offhandedly. After all, he still thinks of you as his best friend.

So do I. He hoped so.

Try not to get yourself killed again, hmm? This was her way of reminding him.

Aa, I’ll try not to he replied fondly. Don’t torture Lelouch too much.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

The witch had seen a lot of things in her time, but she had never known two potential acceptors in such close proximity. Or two such obviously clashing personalities on a collision course.

It had happened before, of course.

C.C. wondered if there was enough time to get clear before the explosions--both metaphorical and literal--happened.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

May 27th, 2017 a.t.b.

Four days after his near death experience as a result of “friendly fire”, Suzaku was conscious and pretending that his ribs and thighbone had not mended abnormally quickly. It would be giving undeserved credit to the body armour--at least one generation out of date--supplied to the units comprising of Honorary Britannians. The standard joke was the only difference between military-issued body armour and toilet paper was that you could wipe your arse with the toilet paper.

Suzaku was on an IV drip, but due to the ridiculous rate at which his body consumed metabolites to mend itself, he was ravenous and unable to request for a lot of real food without letting the nursing staff know why. At times like this, he wished C.C. was around to call the food delivery services for which she had the numbers memorised or on speed-dial.

It was past noon and his daydreams of solid food were interrupted by the sudden mental noise of the Geass reawakening. It was loud enough that it drowned out his stomach. Sitting up carefully, Suzaku looked around the ward. The other three seriously injured but not critical soldiers sharing the room were mostly out of it and none of the nursing staff were present--

The door of the ward opened and a uniformed Britannian soldier stepped in. Only it was no soldier.

“Lelouch, what are you doing here?” he whispered. He had been half-expecting it, but reality usually took him by surprise. For one thing, he had not expected Lelouch to seek him out in here of all places.

Glancing around cautiously, Lelouch assured himself that the other occupants of the ward were safely unconscious before moving to Suzaku’s bedside. “I came to find out if that woman was telling the truth. You’re alive--”

“C.C.?”

“So it is her real name?”

“It’s what she calls herself,” Suzaku said, dodging the actual question. “What are you doing walking into a Britannian military hos--”

“To make sure you’re alive, dummy.” The look of relief on Lelouch’s face was all too real. “I saw you . . . you were shot--”

“Not in vital areas,” Suzaku said. It was not a lie. If the bullets had scored direct hits on his lungs, liver, heart or brain, he doubted that his body could recover from that sort of damage. “Look, the doctors and nurses make hourly rounds through the wards and it’s almost time for them to check in here. We have to talk elsewhere.”

“Aa, that might be wise. The roof?” There would be fewer prying eyes there.

“All right . . . You go first and I’ll meet you there after the doctor makes his rounds,” Suzaku said and hesitated briefly. “Get me a sandwich from the canteen, please?”

* * * * * * * * * * * *

May 27th, 2017 a.t.b.

Suzaku showed up ten minutes after Lelouch made it to the roof. His IV drip was dangling on a mobile stand and he was limping slightly--all in all, he did look like he had been very near death.

“Are you insane? You don’t even have shoes on!” Lelouch exclaimed. Suzaku was clad in a white hospital smock and little else. It was just like him to rush about impulsively without thinking to put on more clothes.

“There weren’t any shoes around,” Suzaku said, leaning slightly on the IV stand. “I’m not supposed to be up and about actually . . .”

Lelouch noticed his stare and handed over the packet of sandwiches he had bought along the way. Suzaku wolfed them down, apparently without pausing for breath.

“I can tell Nunnally that your appetite hasn’t changed,” Lelouch said dryly. “She’s happy to know you’re alive, thanks to your friend. Incidentally, I’m happy to see that you’ve made a new acquaintance.”

He tried not to look as though he was scrutinising Suzaku’s face for . . . something that would tell him what was going on. It made him uncomfortable because he did not like to play these games with his friends. But he had to know . . .

“Yes, she is a handful--I hope she didn’t make too much trouble for you.”

“Other than being an escaped subject from a secret experiment my brother was conducting, no,” Lelouch said. It was always like this with Suzaku. He would drive Lelouch to tactless, unthinking bluntness all the time when they were younger. But there was something different this time . . .

“Yes, she was . . . taken a few years ago by an agency that doesn’t actually appear in any directory,” Suzaku said. “I heard the news about your brother.”

The announcement of Clovis’ demise had been broadcast just yesterday. But Lelouch had already made certain arrangements concerning that--it was all part of the plan he had been incubating.

“They took long enough to announce it,” he said and took a deep breath. “I did it, Suzaku--the first shot of the war against Britannia.”

There was a brief silence that stretched out between one second and the next. Lelouch wondered why he was holding his breath.

“Why are you telling me this?” Suzaku did not appear surprised. Lelouch had expected shock, horror or even revulsion, but Suzaku only looked weary.

“Because I want to know why you joined the military. Because I want to know what is your relationship with that woman that Clovis was so interested in experimenting on.” There were other questions, but those were the most important ones right now. “And I want to know if--”

“If it changes anything between us?” Suzaku asked.

It was then that Lelouch realised that everything had changed. The Suzaku standing before him was not the same as the Suzaku of that blissful summer seven years ago.

“I’m still your friend, that’s why I don’t want you to fight,” Suzaku continued. “You should be home with Nunnally, taking care of her and making her happy--”

“A future with Britannia ruling the world is not going to benefit anyone who is weak or powerless,” Lelouch said, but his mind was wandering far afield. What had happened? What had happened to Suzaku?

“You vowed to destroy Britannia when we were ten,” Suzaku said. “I thought you hated Britannia because you were angry about a lot of things. You’re still angry and you still hate them now, but starting a war--”

“Is the only way I can stop that man and find out who--”

“Revenge at the expense of how many lives?”

“You’re a soldier--why are you asking me this?” Lelouch threw up his hands in exasperation. “They never reported the death toll in the ghetto. Over a thousand deaths--innocent bystanders most of them. Gunned down by soldiers. Your people, Suzaku--”

“Are my people. Don’t use them in a war against Britannia,” Suzaku said and Lelouch realised that his oldest friend was making a plea for him to turn back.

Why are you not on my side, Suzaku?

“I won’t hide my motives. There are those who willingly fight against Britannia. If they choose to accept my help--”

“You don’t have to agree,” Suzaku cut in.

“I didn’t think you could have changed so much,” Lelouch said at last, too angry and confused to think straight when confronted with this stranger with the face of a friend. “The Suzaku I knew would have fought ‘til his very last breath--”

“The Lelouch I knew was not a murderer.”

“Call me what you like, but I am willing to pay the price for it,” Lelouch ground out. “Those who fight to protect the homeland have the right to rule, according to Britannian Imperial Laws. Those who kill have to be prepared to be killed.”

But even as he said it, Lelouch knew that he had already paid a price for his actions that day. He might have lost something irreplaceable as a result.

It might be more than what I can afford . . .

* * * * * * * * * * * *