ARACHNOPHOBIA

DISCLAIMER: NONE OF THIS IS MINE. BLAME NIGHTOW FOR CREATING TRIGUN’S WONDERFUL WORLD.

WARNINGS: YAOI, TWINCEST AND EVERY OTHER UGLY THING. AND –OMG- LOVE!

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ARACHNOPHOBIA

pathological fear or loathing of spiders

Chapter 13: Through Your Skin

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“Knives...? Knives! Oh, god, KNIVES!”

The mental link between them dissipated so fast it hurt, and Vash cried out in pain. He watched with bottomless horror as Knives’ platinum hair began to turn black from the roots.

“No..." Vash’s lips trembled. "Please don't do this to me!”

A lone tear ran down Knives’ pale cheek, slithering down along his jawline, finally dropping on Vash's shaking hand that was holding him. As if waking up from a trance, Vash cradled his brother tighter in his arms and pressed his limp body close to his chest. He began to rock back and forth, whispering sweet nothings into Knives' sweat-damp hair, pleading and praying, until he was crying so hard he couldn't get any words out.

But Knives didn’t hear him. Knives simply wasn’t there, anymore.

'Knvives, come on... You can’t die. You’re immortal. Stop playing this stupid fucking game with me and open your eyes.'

Vash gathered all his strength and tried to reach Knives through their mental link, but no matter how hard he pushed in, he couldn’t feel even the faintest outline of his brother’s thoughts. He trailed his blood-stained fingers across Knives’ face, trying to figure out what to do, his brain totally unwilling to cooperate. A cold, empty spot began to form in his chest as he realised Knives truly wasn’t going to open his eyes, anymore.

“Fuck...”

Frantically, Vash began to place burning kisses all across his brother's face, feeling the precious moments slipping away. He felt helpless, he felt alone, and he felt more than a little bit hysterical. His mind quickly flickered back to Milly’s mauled face, and he grimaced. He should’ve known better than to leave Knives alone with the girls. After all, Knives was seriously injured, and it was only natural of every hurt animal – or plant – to lash out in order to keep anyone from touching them. And he had known from the look in Milly’s eyes that, in Vash’s absence, she would be trying to get closer to his brother. He’d seen the brave glimmer in those pale blue irises; a glimmer that verged on masochistic if not even suicidal. But he’d ignored it. Like he’d ignored so many things he shouldn’t have, recently.

He really had no-one else to blame for this mess but himself.

Vash looked down at his beloved twin and gently lowered his head to brush his lips against his brother’s mouth. Knives couldn’t leave him like this! Knives was the only one who had ever understood him. He was the only one who knew what it felt like to be born a plant instead of a human - what it felt like to be hated and scorned - what it felt like to receive kicks and blows just for being different. It was Knives’ relentless hatred and power towards the spiders that had always been the driving force behind Vash’s every action; it was through Knives’ evil deeds Vash had finally found his own place in this world.

Vash shuddered as the reality hit him hard. All his life, he’d been reaching for something he could never obtain: a life of an ordinary man. But he now realised he could never be ordinary, and he could never be a man. He would always be something else. Something... more.

Collapsing under the pressure of his guilt, Vash wept into his brother’s hot neck. He wept for the fading memories of their childhood, knowing he should try to cherish them; because if Knives was to die in his arms tonight, there would be no memories of him in the future. With growing despair, Vash wordlessly screamed for help. He wished that someone, anyone, could hear him and come to his aid. He wished for a miracle – for a divine interference – because he knew nothing less would be enough.

‘Divine beings don’t exist in our world, my love.’

Vash’s eyes shot open and he looked around the small bathroom, alarmed. Someone had clearly spoken to him, yet there was no-one in there but the two of them.

‘You can’t stop the tide. The world is changing.’

Vash realised there was a faint, almost whisper-like female voice echoing inside of his head; a mental link created between him and soneone else than Knives. Vash felt both horrified and relieved at the same time. He hadn’t talked to anyone except Legato Bluesummers and his brother in this intimate way, but now... The voice was soft, like a rustle of velvety leaves of a lush tree; calming and soothing.

"What the...?"

‘Open your eyes, love. Look around you, and you will find the answers you are searching for.’

Not questioning the voice's advice, Vash looked up. With sudden, almost frightening clarity, he realised anew that they were in a bathroom. Why? There had to be a reason why Knives had dragged himself in here and not stayed in the bedroom. Knives never did anything without a reason, except killing spiders. Vash glanced upwards and saw the shower looming just above them.

“Shower... Cold shower... And Knives is burning...”

Without thinking twice, Vash carefully laid his brother down on the floor and stood up. Then he fumbled with the tap for a moment, until he managed to release a spray of cold water. Then he sat down, gathered Knives in his arms again and began to run the water down his brother’s scorching body, hoping against all hope he was doing the right thing.

“Come on now, you stupid punk!” Vash muttered, his voice silent and worried. “Feels good, right? Tell me it feels good.”

He propped Knives firmly up against himself so that he could use his both hands. He smoothed Knives’ bare chest and arms, ghosting his fingers over the bandages wrapped around his firm body. They were all wet now, staining the water pink where it swirled into the small drain. Vash moved to shower Knives’ hair and neck, watching carefully if he got any reaction out of his twin. But Knives didn’t even flinch when the cold touched his skin. He just lay still. Completely still.

Vash cried hard, his tears mixing with the water. He couldn’t believe he’d allowed this to happen. Every fatal mistake he’d made during the past few hours soared through his mind. He should never have left Knives alone with strangers, knowing how easily agitated his brother could get. He should never have met Frank Marlon. What the hell did he need a gun for? It’s not like he was going to shoot his brother in the head for real, was it? If only he’d stayed here, right next to Knives when he needed him, none of this would have happened. Milly’s face would still be as pretty as always, and Knives wouldn’t be dying right now.

Knives, his only brother. His only family.

‘Oh, how he needed you... And you turned away his love.’

The voice was back again, now sounding very sad. Vash moaned, new tears spilling from his eyes, and nuzzled his nose into his brother’s wet, blood-stained, blackened hair. ‘No...’

‘He needed you like the shadows need the suns to exist. But you weren’t shining enough... Your heart was clouded... You refused him.’

‘That’s not true! I didn't refuse him!’ Vash squeezed Knives’ body so hard it would’ve probably hurt his twin, had the other man been aware of the pain. ‘I was just... I don’t know... confused!’

‘Your insecurities might have cost him his life, my love. He’s growing weaker as we speak.’

Vash sobbed hard, noticing there were hardly any silvery-blond streaks left in his brother’s hair. ‘Please... no...’

‘If death comes to him tonight, brother... Make sure he knows that you cared for him.’ The voice suddenly turned weaker, as if a winter’s breeze would have brushed over a blooming meadow flower and made it lower its head. ‘Make sure he knows that you loved him... because nobody else ever did.’

Vash realised he couldn’t see anymore because his eyes were so completely filled with tears. ‘Yes... I would tell him that I love him... But he can’t hear me anymore... He’s not here anymore...’

‘So the dawn will be crimson.’

‘W-who are you, anyway?’

‘Look inside your heart, Vash the Stampede, and I’ll look inside mine.’

Shaking his head, Vash closed his eyes and decided – for once – to be rational. How many Legato-clones Knives could have actually made? As far as Vash knew, he only missed one arm. ‘You... You must be one of my sisters.’

‘Yes,’ the voice sounded breathless. ‘We are connected. Through our mothers, we are one.’

Blood and energy both raced in Vash’s veins faster than an overheated sand steamer. ‘Through our mothers...’

‘So... On the sixth night, those signals bring travellers together...’

Eyes burning, Vash listened to the silent song and stared at the ugly toilet seat in front of him. A spark so dim that it might’ve been the last flicker of a small candle sprung to life in his heart. He finally realised what he had to do.

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Breath hitching, hair falling messily over his eyes, his clothes soaked with water and gore, Vash ran towards the Western Plant of Warrens City. The afternoon was slowly making way for the evening, pushing the twin suns lower and lower into the horizon. The villagers turned to give curious looks at the Humanoid Typhoon as he went past running, carrying his half-naked, blood-stained brother over his shoulder. But Vash ignored the strange looks he was getting. It wasn’t the first time he’d received them, and probably wouldn’t be the last. His only concern at the moment was to get Knives connected with the Western Plant –or more specifically, with his sister.

Vash had no idea know how he’d managed to connect his mind with hers, but he didn’t complain. True, he had talked to his sisters before, only the conversations had been entirely one-sided. Vash had always been able to connect himself to his sisters at some level, to be able to feel what they were feeling; but he’d never imagined he could be able to interact with them on a personal level like this.

Panting heavily from the effort of carrying his brother, he turned one corner after another and jogged on. For the second time within a month, he realised how heavy his brother’s listless body could feel in his arms. He was already sweating, although he’d only been running less than ten minutes. And when he finally got the plant in sight, he groaned: he’d forgotten how high and massive the Western Plant actually was.

“You better recover, do you hear me, Knives?” Vash huffed as he elbowed in the heavy iron door that guarded the dark and steep staircase of the plant. “I’m going to hold you responsible if I get a seizure while running up those damnable stairs with your heavy ass on my shoulder!”

Three minutes and some later, Vash reached the top where the bulb was connected to the high, arched base. The slowly darkening sky seemed to be very close up here, almost like at the top of the surrounding mountains, but the air felt weirdly oppressive. Vash was exhausted, both by the physical excercise and the constant fear for his brother, and there were black dots swimming in his vision. He gently laid Knives down and fell on his knees, panting heavily.

However, there was no time to be wasted.

‘Sister, can you hear me? Are you still there?’

‘I am here, love... Waiting... Like the morning dew waits in silence... dreading the inevitable... dreading the dawn...’

‘Don’t be such a drama queen. You’ve never even seen morning dew.’

‘You are so crude...’

‘Quit wasting time and get ready to heal him.’

‘I am not as strong as Mother. I can’t make you any promises.’

‘You don’t have to.’ Vash pushed some of his golden locks away from his eyes as he began to screw open the bolts of the steely hatch that led straight to the inner parts of the bulb. ‘Knives already made me all the promises I need.’

Bright light struck his face as he pushed the hatch aside, and with it, some of his sister’s strong energy seeped through his skin and into his veins like a highly infectuous fever. Feeling his strenght rapidly returning by this energy assault, Vash followed his sister’s instructions and carefully lowered Knives down from the hatch, letting him sink under the surface of the strange, electric liquid, the colour of which was a mixture of light blue and pale pink. Surprisingly, Knives seemed to be able to breathe in it - which, hoewever, was only a light comfort considering the whole situation.

With difficulty based on half-hearted unwillingness, Vash let go of Knives’ hand and let his sister fully embrace him. ‘Please don’t hurt him.’

‘No-one can hurt him like you can, Vash... But I’ll be gentle.’

Silently, Vash watched how the ethereal woman pulled Knives’ back flush against her bare chest, wrapping her slender legs around his waist. The pair seemed to float in the centre of the shimmering bulb, seemingly weightless, and Vash idly wondered what it would feel like to join them down there. However, when she roughly bent Knives down and plunged her fingers through Knives’ pale, wounded skin right under the shoulderblades, thrusting her hands deep inside his body, Vash decided it was best to stay the hell out of the bulb. Knives went rigid, then spasmed, and then began to glow.

Grimacing with compassion for his brother, Vash closed his tear-swollen eyes, relaxing on the edge of the electric pool. ‘You know, sister, he makes me feel so confused.’ He reached down to the heavily charged liquid with his metallic arm, reloading his own energy supplies as he was conversing. ‘But I... I think I can understand him now. Somehow. In a twisted, very disturbed sort of way. He... He was hurt. He’s traumatized. I should forgive him everything he’s ever done.’

‘You already have, my love.’

‘Yeah... Except there’s still the issue of the spiders...’ Vash didn’t know when he’d started to refer to the humans as spiders like his twin, but it seemed now irrelevant. ‘He will always hate them. He thinks they’re the lowest dirt of the universe, waiting to be wiped out. And I can’t agree with him on that. It would be just too cruel to kill them all.’

‘Then do not kill. Rather, command.’

Vash sighed deeply. ‘That won’t do. Knives wants to get rid of them entirely.’

‘Knives is afraid of them.’

‘He will try to destroy them again, as soon as he gets well. And I will try to stop him again. It goes on and on... forever...’ Vash felt his chest grow heavy with sorrow. ‘It will never end.’

‘He’s immersed his body in the river of vengeance.’ Sister trailed her nose down Knives’ ash pale cheek, allowing his head to rest against her soft bosom. ‘You must show him that you love him. Then he will fear no more. Together, you can face the darkest of times and remain whole.’

Vash opened his eyes, a melancholy smile playing on his lips. ‘I wish I could see that happening.’

‘Be sure to make the right choices when the time comes.’ Sister looked up at him then, with alien eyes that were just as aquamarine green as his own, but they were so bright with inner light that it hurt to encounter their gaze. ‘All the chilly nights and tomorrow hold no meaning if you fight forever, neither gaining victory. You only have each other now, Vash.’

Sister suddenly swirled Knives around in her arms, so that her fingers could be seen through the skin where Knives's hips were. Then she bent down and kissed him fiercely on the mouth. Vash watched, mesmerised, as his brother slowly began to respond to that kiss, soft sparkles of shared energy floating around them both. Horrified to find out his pants were getting tight at the sight, Vash tried to look away... but couldn't.

“Shit...”

Sister laughed and suddenly pulled her hands out of Knives’ spasming body, releasing him.

‘He’s all yours now, Vash... And it’s time for me to say goodbye.’

Vash covered his eyes against the blinding light that burst out of the hatch, ostensibly forcing its way through every cell of his body. And then, just as unexpectedly, everything went dark. Lights went out everywhere around him; the entire city went black. The only source of illumination was the faint sunlight that was still trying to crawl up from the horizon, casting a flaming hue over the sand-coloured rooftops, painting the sky with an ominous red.

“V-Vash...”

Chills running down his spine, Vash looked down.

Knives was lying at the bottom of the empty bulb, alone and naked, shivering with cold and rampant energy... his bright, platinum hair spread out in the shape of an angelic halo around his head.

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...To Be Continued...

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