The Past Life

When I awoke in the morning, I had that feeling of disorientation one feels when they wake up in a strange room. Memories of the past night came back to me quickly, at which point I became aware of my bed partner.

Master was obviously not used to sharing his bed with anyone. He was lying on his back with his arm and leg casually thrown over top of me, as though I wasn't even there. It probably would have looked rather humourous.

I slipped out of the bed as carefully as I could so that I wouldn't wake him and made my way to what, as I discovered later last night, was in fact his private bath.

After we had laid in each other's arms for Gods know how long, I had asked if it would be alright for me to use the facilities to get cleaned up. “Only if I can join you,” was his response.

It was at that point, once I got to a mirror, that I discovered my hair had seen better days. I hadn't taken my pony tail down and the tie had become horribly tangled in. Master had waited patiently for me to at least get rid of most of the knots.

I sighed when I looked in the mirror again that morning. I had some work ahead of me now. My hair was in a state not much better than it has been last night.

I hardly heard the door open when I was just finishing tying my hair back. I caught Master standing behind me in the mirror, looking back at my reflection. “I was afraid you had left,” he said.

“I can't leave. Someone might see me,” I stated, probably more matter-of-factly than I should have.

Master looked away for a second, but I could see the hurt expression in his eyes. I hadn't meant to offend, only to state the fact that I couldn't simply walk out of the room and risk being seen. Master would have to scout out the hall first. I turned around to face him. “Master, I didn't mean...”

He shook his head, “it's alright, Zoi.”

Zoi. He was shortening my name. I furrowed my eyebrows, confused at first.

“Sorry, I really should have asked first,” he said.

“I don't mind,” I said quietly, “it's just that...”

“This was only supposed to be one night, right?”

“It was...” I confirmed.

He was silent for a moment then placed a hand on my shoulder before turning to leave. “Let me know when you are ready to leave.”

It didn't take me too long to get ready, and when I stepped out into the bedroom, I found that Master was mostly dressed as well. He held my sash in hand, offering to place it over my shoulder.

I smiled lightly and allowed him to place the item. He took more time than was required, but I didn't mind as his hand followed the belt around my waist to the clip that held it closed. He proceeded to rearrange my cape around my shoulder, obviously stalling for time. “Master...”

“I'm know, I'm sorry.” He pulled back and looked into my eyes. “If... if you do want to come back... my door is always open to you.”

I opened my mouth, perhaps to protest, but Master interrupted me before I could speak. “It's completely up to you. I won't approach you about it, I promise.”

All I could do was nod my agreement. I couldn't really ask for more than that.

Master slid the bedroom door open and left it for me while he went to the main doorway and opened it as well. Signalling that the coast was clear, I left the bedroom and quickly passed through the open door. I tried not too look back over my shoulder and moved down the hall quickly, back to my own room.

I wasn't paying close attention to my surroundings, so it wasn't terribly surprising when I turned a corner quickly and bumped right into another.

We both apologized automatically, at which point I noticed that it was Jadeite I had run into. I had been hoping to get back to my own room without being seen, but that was perhaps too much to hope for.

“Zoisite. I... um...”

“How are you doing?” I asked. He would still be upset over the events of the night before, I reasoned.

“Fine, I guess. I just hope that everything can get back to normal now...”

Wasn't that the truth. “I know what you mean.”

Jadeite appeared confused by something for a moment. “Did you forget your gloves?”

I looked at my hands and found that they were indeed bare. I had noticed that last night, but hadn't been in the state of mind to care. It was unheard of for any of the Shitennou or even any of the regular palace guard to be in anything less than an immaculate uniform. “I... must have left them in my room.”

“I can't blame you, I certainly didn't get much sleep last night. You?”

“Not much.”

There was an awkward silence between us, thankfully Jadeite broke it. “Sorry, there's something I wanted to do. Will you be in the music room later?”

“I will.”


Life, for the most part, did get back to normal. After a few days, most of us were able to push the memories of that particular incident aside and move on. After a month, it was long forgotten.

The nightly routine of keeping watch outside Master's door resumed, as did weapons and magic practice. I would still find myself sitting at the piano for hours on end, playing or composing. Normality had returned for the most part.

I couldn't stop thinking about that 'one night'. Master had been true to his word and had not mentioned it, not even when we were alone. He would have a look in his eyes that spoke volumes about how he wanted another 'one night', but he would say nothing.

I successfully fought off temptation for a full two weeks, using my music to clear my head, but it would not last. I could distract myself during the day, but not when sleep claimed me at night.

The dreams were always of that night, but something would be different in each one. Sometimes it would be the location, in others the sequence of events would change. Always I would awaken with a start and curse the dream. Why would I not be permitted to move on with my life?

If I was a religious man, I would probably take this as a sign from the Kami that I was supposed to be with Master Endymion. I was not, however, and continued to force myself to ignore the dreams. Why would the Gods, as they were supposed to protect the Earth Prince just as we did, want such a thing? It was ridiculous.

Lying in bed, a fortnight after our first encounter, I couldn't sleep. Perhaps because I knew what awaited me. Instead I found myself getting out of bed and wandering aimlessly through the palace, with no clear direction.

It was still early evening, I could see the sun set through the windows I passed before turning down another hall at random and then another. When I eventually found myself standing outside Master's door, I was not surprised.

I stared at the door for several minutes, contemplating raising my hand to knock. If I did this, it was going to be more than just one more night. There would be another, and another. How long would it last? Until Master began to court a young woman? Until he was married? Or perhaps until we were found out. We had managed one night successfully, but it would just be a matter of time, would it not?

I did raise my hand and I did knock, but there was no answer. 'It's for the best,' I told myself as I turned to leave, but I stopped before I even took a step. Master was standing right there in the hall, watching me.

He acted quickly, opening the door and practically pushed me through it. There were no words spoken between us before we embraced, hungrily pressing our lips and bodies together. “I was afraid you wouldn't come back,” Master said breathlessly.

“So was I.”