For All the Wrong Reasons

For All the Wrong Reasons

by Lemon & Chai

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MAJOR NOTE! Aff.net really messed up chapter 18, so I went back and cleaned it up. It duplicated the chapter three times then cut part of the chapter off so... check to make sure you read to the end. -sweatdrop-

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Rating: N17. Bondage, S&M, D/s, and well everything else. Yuki-muse is horny.

Summary: A YukiFuji, SanaTezu fic, with eventual fivesome with Atobe. Inspired by kitti-chan and lolistar.

Warning: Abuse. But well, nothing worse than what you've read so far. So...yeah.

All-Tezuka flashback. Very badly written. With horrible changes between first and third person.

Review replies:

drmsr: glad you liked XD smex can't happen without Fuji! not good smex anyways kekeke. I didn't realize I posted the chapter three times, oops, gomen!

ibanquet: it gets a little bit more complicated near the end too. Thanks for reviewing!

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Part 19

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"Our relationship may have looked sweet on the outside, and in the beginning, it was. Fuji was my first boyfriend, and I his. Neither of us had ever had sex - Fuji'd messed around with friends before but he said it more like masturbating than love making. We didn't know how to start, and when we finally did, we went too quickly... but we were both very careful. I can't say our first time was a moon light romance but we managed. I wanted it, so badly, and so did he... and after that we were like animals. During the day we stood next to each other calmly, but at night we were hormonal beasts. Every chance we got, we did it. It was an addiction, an obsession... for both of us.

"Before we became a couple, we'd shared many simple moments together, and we continued to do so, but Fuji wanted more from the relationship. He took me on dates, and though we took turns doing activities each of us enjoyed, it wasn't really working. But I loved him, so I endured whatever games and noise he wanted to take part in. I was happy just to be beside him. But I always felt that he was bored whenever doing something on my end... fishing... hiking... he liked taking pictures but after several hours there was nothing new to see.

"Even so, we continued this pattern, quietly together at school, spending time going out together, and having sex, always, even when we had to go to a hotel because our families were home. Rumors spread... probably from the regulars, but perhaps someone saw us... about our relationship. We started being invited places as a couple... and Fuji loved it. He'd always wanted to be more public about our relationship. It was the one... it was the first thing we argued about. I do not like seeing others making out or being... cuddly.... and I do not want others to see myself in such a way. But Fuji complained that I was afraid to share our relationship... of the social judgment. For us to go to a place together as boyfriends was his way to declare that he was taken.

"We have mutual friends through tennis, but Fuji also has friends through class and his many hobbies. They all wanted to meet Fuji's boyfriend. We went from party to party, and I hated it. Even when we were with others I knew, Fuji would... he was different with them than with me. There was a side of him he never showed unless he was with those groups. And the way he talked to them... he was vibrant, lively, and chatted madly, while with me he was always subdued and quiet.

"In the beginning, I dismissed it, but after a while it started to irritate me. I thought about leaving but I refused to leave Fuji with them ... I refused to let him go without me. I was jealous, but I didn't realize it back then. All I knew was that I wanted to stop him, every time he talked to others, every time he smiled at them, and make him come home with me.

"We fell into a pattern... we'd go somewhere he wanted to, I'd eventually get us to leave, we'd go somewhere else and have breathtaking sex, then spend the next morning arguing. I can't even remember what most of our fights were over... they all seem like trivial things in retrospect.

"The sex stayed good but the fights grew worse. He tried to go out without me, but I'd always find out about it and follow him. He went back to inviting me. But once we arrived he would break off and go talk with other people. Smile at them, laugh with them... hug them, dance with them... I would pull him aside, and tell him how much I disliked whoever he'd been talking to, I'd make up all sorts of reasons on why they were horrible and that he shouldn't let his guard down around them. During this time, a friend actually pulled me aside and told me I was being possessive, but it didn't sink in. And Fuji would always give in to me, and be taken away by me, and I'd lay claim to his body. He enjoyed it but in the morning he'd complain, saying he'd wanted to spend more time with his friends, or doing whatever he was doing. I got into the habit of silencing him with kisses... which always led to more sex. In the end, he'd have to give in...

"But when I forbade him from going to Chiba to visit his friend Saeki, the fights turned nasty. I hated Saeki, since he was one of the friends who Fuji'd fooled around with before. The thought that someone else had seen Fuji... flushed, moaning, coming... drove me mad. He said it was all in the past, that I was being ridiculous, and that he'd go whether or not he had my permission. I tried to kiss him but he pulled away and said he didn't feel like it... but somehow that night we still ended up covered in each other's cum. But he didn't talk to me until after his trip to Chiba. And I was so angry at that point I stopped talking to him as well for awhile. And yet we'd still have sex... we'd memorized our families' schedules, and one of us would go to the other and the only words we'd exchange were through moans.

"An invitation came to us, actually to several tennis players in the junior high circuit, for a massive get-together at a Hyotei mansion. Of course we had to attend as a couple... we were back to talking to each other, and doing a little better with our relationship. Our quiet times at school and at practice had never varied. We tried laying off the social dates and just going off on our own, like we had at first, and it was somehow better after having those other disasters to compare it to. But at the party, it was clear that Fuji hadn't changed. He'd dressed rather sassily, in an unzipped jacket and a black tank top, and pants so tight that even the fabric was screaming.

"It was like he'd been going through social withdrawal. He waved at everyone, knew everyone, had to stop and catch up with everyone and would have light conversations with each person, batting his lashes and laughing when they said something to him. Some of them came over to talk to me but I was too upset watching him to give them more than a nod of acknowledgement. My eyes could only see him, and they were narrowing, glaring at those horny bastards who were pawing at my Syuusuke. And yes, Atobe, you were one of them - don't smile smugly, he gave you no more attention than the others. Everyone had some of his attention - everyone but me.

"And then... then that asshole from Fudoumine... had the audacity to kiss him. On the cheek. In front of everyone. In front of me. ... And Syuusuke just laughed...

"I felt so sick, I left. I left without him, and even he seemed surprised.

"The bus ride home was long, but I couldn't calm down. A churning restlessness built within me, and instead of transferring to the bus that would take me home, I wandered around the transit station. It was a bad part of town and an even worse time of night. But I've been in that area before and always had been able to defend myself. Tonight was no different... some teens from the local high school tried to mess with me, and... I beat them. There were two of them, they were older and bigger, but I beat both of them, badly. It wasn't even self-defense. My fists screamed with anger, and I punched and kicked them without thinking. I remember one begging me to stop, and kicking him in the face before I left.

"I walked back. It wasn't far by bus but it took almost an hour on foot. The air was cold and dark but I still felt hot. I finally arrived... and found myself in front of Syuusuke's house. I'd ended up there by instinct. He must have left the party early, because the lights were on, even though both his parents were abroad and his siblings living at other places.

"I stood outside the gate for an eternity, but only a few minutes passed before my feet started dragging towards that familiar door."

After pulling on his night gown, Fuji sighed and trudged downstairs. He didn't know who'd be calling at this time of night, but if it was one of those religious recruiters he was going to scream at them. He'd just finished a quick shower that should have come after a night of mind blowing sex, but instead he felt too unsatisfied to even masturbate. He was too tired, anyway, after seeing so many old friends, and Tezuka's behavior... he'd hoped his boyfriend would handle this better than the other parties. His friends who didn't already knew Tezuka through tennis thought his boyfriend was a bore, stern, far too unemotional and not a good fit for a vibrant spirit like Fuji. But the tensai knew the real man behind the glasses, and surely their former rivals knew so as well, so he'd thought the reunion would be fun, for both of them.

He yanked open the door, prepared to get his vocal chords going, and was shocked to see the object of his desire standing hunched over before him. Maybe he'd be getting that night of endless sex after all. Smiling, he waved his tennis captain inside. "You shouldn't have left," he chided, closing the door behind them. "Rikkaidai showed up and their vice captain wanted to see you. They said something about a summer training camp..."

Sighing, Fuji gave up what he was saying. Tezuka showed no signs of response... none of his usual grunts, nods, or other nonverbal forms of acknowledgement. Hazel eyes burned holes through the air, as intense as ever, but there was something off... Fuji realized that Tezuka was still mad at him.

But he was mad at Tezuka too, for embarrassing them in front of their friends. Everyone kept asking if the two of them had broken up - it was horrible. He'd lied and lightly laughed, telling them how Tezuka had already felt a little ill before they came and that they'd agreed he would leave if he felt any worse. Still, Fuji knew there would be rumors, and he hated it. He was afraid, too, that someone else would go after his captain if they thought Tezuka was single.

Pushing these thoughts aside, Fuji decided to take a little vengeance by chattering on about the night. He talked about what different people had worn, what people had switched schools, who was now paired with who, either in doubles or in bed, or both - "and Atobe invited us to join him on his yacht this weekend. I've never been boating before, not on anything small. I accepted of course. The weather should be wonderful and-"

"He invited you."

The growl caught him off guard, and Fuji blinked in surprise, "What?"

Tezuka didn't respond, his eyes glaring intensely at Fuji's pale face. He had been watching, with the same intensity, when Atobe Keigo had practically molested Fuji's shoulder and back with a 'friendly' rub and how the brunette had only laughed and continued on with his spirited chatter, as though nothing were wrong. Then Tachibana'd appeared, and he recalled that the black haired captain had been calling lately, how Fuji'd been having long conversations with him, and then that abominable kiss...

Sighing heavily, Fuji decided it was time for some tea, the one thing they'd always shared in common. He hated times like this, when his boyfriend refused to speak to him. He turned towards the kitchen and took a step away when Tezuka grabbed his arm, jerking him back. He yelped in surprise and fell backward, his body slamming into the coffee table.

The motion went to quickly for Tezuka's mind to follow. In one moment he refused to let Fuji walk away from him, then the next the tensai was on his back, mouth dropped open in a moan of pain as he rolled off the short legged table. His body dropped in the wide space between the table and the couch, where the traditional seat pads cushioned the floor.

The tensai was still in shock when suddenly Tezuka was on top of him, both wrists in his hands, and kissing him roughly.

At first Fuji returned the kiss, then his eyes widened as the pain cleared and he pushed the tall youth away, pulling himself out from underneath Tezuka. Fuming red, he stood up and screamed, "Tezuka what the fu-"

But his boyfriend cut him off by grabbing him and throwing him onto the couch, the back of his knees slamming into the armrest before he was dragged all the way up. The leering brunette practically tore off his clothes, the sound of buttons snapping drowned by the ripping of cloth. Instincts kicking in he struggled to get away but Tezuka started hitting him, slapping his cheeks and shoulders until he stopped. His body remembered the time of his childhood and sunk to the form of a submissive doll.

"Tezuka, I don't want this..." Fuji sobbed as Tezuka draped him over the side of the couch. Tezuka grabbed him by the neck to pull him up, gripping his ankles and thighs to position him the way he wanted.

"You would rather do it with them?!" Tezuka sneered, tearing away the last bit of Fuji's clothing, an offensive pair of black briefs.

"I pinned him, trapped him with all of my weight. I can't remember spreading his legs, but I must have, for I remember the moment of penetration, slamming into him, the intense, incredible feeling of being squeezed by his unprepared hole. I remember thrusting, raggedly but slowly. It was so tight that it hurt."

Fuji screamed again and again, but Tezuka was deaf at that moment. His entire body was on fire, overwhelmed with the sensation on his greatest part of manhood, pumping in and out of the tunnel man had evolved for. He had everything in that moment - pain, pleasure, dominance, control, Fuji - Fuji was his. No one else could have him, not like this.

He came earlier than he wanted, and pulled out with a strange squish. Fuji whimpered as the grip on him loosened, and tried to pull himself up. But Tezuka would have none of it. How dare Fuji still try to leave him! He grabbed the tensai by the neck, dragging him off the couch and slammed him into the wall. He heard a secondary thud as the back of Fuji's head hit the drywall. Shifting his hands, he used one to push the tensai's chest to keep him back, and the other to squeeze the brunette's cock, pumping it hard and relishing in the moans that followed. Fuji's eyes fluttered listlessly as he faded in and out of consciousness.

Tezuka kissed him one more time, molesting bruised lips with his tongue, then turned him around and fucked him fast and hard from behind. He came, waiting a few seconds to enjoy the ecstasy, then went back to thrusting, fucking, until he came again. He didn't know how many times he did it, until he could no longer come. By then they were face down on the ground, Fuji pressed limply beneath him, and he was panting and dripping with sweat.

Fuji's cum was splattered on the wall.

"He came, I don't know why. I don't remember him getting hard. The next thing I knew he was limp in my arms, passed out from the pain. I remember feeling victorious, and then horrified in the next instant. There was blood running down his legs and on the carpet, more than even our first time."

Blood was everywhere. On the couch, on the floor cushions, all over Fuji's legs, along with splotches of white. Tezuka found himself standing, staring at it all, panting and wide-eyed with horror as he took it all in. Bruises and cuts covered his beloved, red and purple marks marred all of that perfect porcelain skin. His small lover lay unmoving on the stained carpet, looking as if he'd been beaten to death. He could have been dead, for all Tezuka knew.

But he couldn't touch him to find out. His hands shook too badly, and all the strength had drained from his legs. He stood there, staring blankly at the body of his abused lover, his glasses skewed and lips slightly parted.

He stood there, unable to comprehend what he had done.

His thoughts twisted together, horrified, vile, empty, and overflowing. Tezuka always knew he was strong. He'd been taught judo before he could walk, and he had always had confidence in his ability to handle fiends. He had never felt fear - not true fear, not like this, before. Right now, Tezuka was terrified, more than he'd ever been in his life. His reasonable, responsible side reminded him that he needed to help Fuji, that the brunette probably had a concussion amongst numerous other things. But a dark, laughing side of him he had never known existed wanted to grab the limp, pale form and slap him till he woke, then do it all over again.

The side of him that loved Syuusuke froze and locked itself away.

When his heart started beating again it raced in time to his breathing, which grew heavier and louder by the second. Fuji's clothes were scattered, but his wallet and cell phone were placed neatly on a small table. Tezuka's hands stopped trembling, their lustful excitement faded, and he took hold of Fuji's cell phone with a bazaar calm. Having used the device before, he knew to press speed dial '2'. Even at this time, with the fear and anxiety and dark, raging emotions inside of him, his expression was firm and stoic. He felt like a monster.

"Moshi moshi?" The woman's voice on the other end sounded busy, like she was in the middle of typing something. Well, as a secretary for one of Tokyo's most prestigious law firms, that was to be expected. "Syuusuke?"

Tezuka placed the phone down next to Fuji, taking one last look at his unconscious lover before turning away. He wanted to at least put his beloved tensai on the bed, but right now, he was afraid to even touch the bruise covered skin.

"Syuusuke? Is something wrong? Syuusuke!" He could hear the woman's voice clearly through the speaker even as he exited the house - she sounded panicked.

Tezuka walked away almost briskly, unable to look back. Some blood had splattered on his jeans, but he didn't notice until later. The air felt neither cold nor warm, only dark and still. He was not afraid of the night time streets, nor the starless sky, nor the shattering of glass as a drunkard across the street finished off his beer.

He could take care of himself. Until today Tezuka had never been afraid of anyone. Maybe it was not too surprising that the first whom he truly feared was himself.

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Ugh, horrible writing style. So for switching between the flashback and Tezuka talking. OTL that was my failure for getting the story to flow right.

REVIEW!! I know, aff is really dead, but... please review! It's so encouraging when you do.

I started posting FatWR on ff.net too. :3 Go read it there and review there too! XD Minor changes may be made.