Never More

Never More

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Chapter 2


I shivered on the couch in the small front room that I had made myself. My insides wouldn't stop shaking as I remained curled on the soft cushions. I new my hair was a horrible mess that was tied up and doubled over in a biezzar pony tail. I could hear the cupboards open and close in my kitchen behind me as Camus tried to find something for me to eat. It had taken him a full two hours to get me out of my room and currently I felt like a frightened kitten that just wanted to go back into hiding. I hated it here, in Sanctuary, accually I haven't found a place yet that I don't feel some kind of spite towards. There was always some reason for me to hate something, always.

"Milo," he rounded the couch, bending his knees to look me in the face as I continued to shiver. "How does a nice warm soup sound?"

I shook my head a little derverting my tirees, es, red from all my tears.

"You have to eat something."

"I don't want to..."

"Milo... I'll force feed you," bea beautiful eyes narrowed on me.

I hugged my knees with a sigh, my body giving an extra large shiver as I did so. Setting my chin on my knees I said, "Jello."

"Jello?"

"......"

"Why Jello? Milo, you need to warm up."

I shrugged my shoulders, "I like Jello."

"If I make you Jello will you eat something else besides it?"

I shook my hea
He
He gave a sigh and headed off to the kitchen. I remained there for a while, lost in the thoughts of nothingness. A warmth was suddenly drapped over me, from the sudden contact I gasped and froze. Jerking my head up I looked over my shoulder, nearly falling over. Camus looked just as supprised as I, but I was more frightened than anything else. Slowly, he reached forward taking a hold of my shoulders and settling me back to where I was originally sitting. He ran his hand through the messy hair on top of my head before giving it a pat, then disappearing back into the kitchen. I looked at what he had drapped over me, it was his coat that he had been wearing. My shaking hands clutched at the fabric, pulling it closer. His sent was so prominent on the cloth. Snuggling my face down into the fur rim of the collar, I felt my body give a few more shakes as I started to relax. Why did he have to have this kind of effect on me? Why couldn' be be like all the others? I didn't understand it. When it came to
him, everything was no longer black and white. The picture was filled with gray that slowly started to color and all I could do was stay in the middle of it woundering where I fit in to his world. I'm not important enough to love, my family had made sure that I would always know that. I couldn't be weak, Sanctuary took care of that worry. I couldn't be strong either, an other thing my family excelledtieitieing all loose ends too.

Looking over my shoulder I saw him working away in my kitchen. He was making a soup even though I had protested, but he was making jello as well. My breath started to catch in my throat, my body shook once more but for another reason. I wanted to reach out to him, I wanted to call out his name so badly. I felt like I was drowning and he was the only one that could keep me up... but... I didn't want to drag him down with me. Not him. Not Camus. I slowly took of his jacket, wanting to keep it on. Shakily I stood up, my feet moving by themselves. I slipped out of the temple into the cold night. Taking a seat on the temple steps I rested my head in my hands. Dawn was approching and the cold ground looked so inviting. Leaning over, I gently laid myself upon the ground. Closing my eyes, I tried to get a hold of myself. Camus was there, he was my friend, my only friend. No one else, ever in my life, had done the things he had. He had taken care of me when I needed it, laughed with me, smiled... just for me. So why couldn't I accept the fact that he was one that I could trust?

When I put it that way it's rather simple. I've grown too accustomed with being so alone, to being abused, misused, hurt, back stabbed. I don't want to find out that Camus was just using me for something. I couldn't handle it if that happened again, not after seeing 'his' face. My eyes narrowedthe the snow covered roof top of the temple just below mine. That man... what was I going to do about him? I don't think I could take his life... not ever. If I got near him I risked something to important. I risked my very own freedom. I didn't want to chance becomeing entrapped, not again.

"MILO!" Camus' voice exclaimed as hot hands gripped my arm, pulling me up. "You're freezing cold. God if you caught hypothermia I'll kill you."

My breath hitched as I watched dustdust snow off of me. Fresh hot tears moistened my tender eyes. I sniffled as clumps of melting white was taken out of my hair.

"Milo... you okay?"

I exhailed shakily, my tears trickled down as I voiced my deepest fears iwhiswhisper, "I don't want to go back to him......"

His almost burning hot arms wrapped around my chilled body, he patted my back as he rocked soothingly, "Shh, no one is going to get you."

"I don't want to go back, I don't want to."

"Then don't."

I clentched my eyes, more tears flowing forward. I pushed at his shoulders, feeling my stomach twist, threatening to expell any sort of contence it might have. His eyes watched me as words fell from my leps, I wasn't sure what I was saying all I could hear was my own breathing and my heart beating. I felt me fists clentch as I restrained myself from the primal need to hit something, anything. All I could see when ever I closed my eyes was his face, right there, always there. I didn't want to feel him any more, I didn't want to feel him any more. I finally came back to reality at my voice shouting out, "He was supposed to be fucking DEAD!" I felt my breath catch in my throat in stiffled gasp when Camus' eyes narrowed. I didn't want to tell him that... What the hell was I telling him? What kind of information had I told him in front of my own temple? Quickly turning I dove back into the sanctaty of my home. I heard him calling out, trying to keep up.

"Milo!" he grabbed my arm, a firm grip that just stired my instincts of escape.

"WHAT?!" I shouted, bowing my head as he hold loosened to more of a gentle touch. I pulled my arm away and rubbed the area he had held only a moment ago.

"I don't know what it's like to have someone of my own family sexually assult me... and I don't know what it's like to be shunned and ridiculed like you have."

"Then what the hell do you know?!" I didn't mean to snap, but I just wanted to disappear. I didn't want him to know all of my dirty secrets, I didn't want him to be tained from being around me... not him, anyone but him.

"WHAT I do know, is that you... have friends now. We're your family Milo, not them," his voice became tender and soft as he reached for me again. His hands still rather hot to the touch. He turned me around, not forcing me to look him the eye as he wrapped his arms around my shoulders, "We're your family,re yre your friends, and we are the ones that care for you." He let go of me, pushing me back just enough for him to brush back my hair from my face to hold my cheeks, "And you... and me... we're going to Athens tomorrow. We're going to have fun, just you and me. Okay?"

I sniffled a little trying to get my head about me. He had a tendancy of doing this. When ever he thought I was even remotly down he would think of some way to spend alone time with me and make me smile. When ever I get into a good, familiar, depression he comes around and that bumber sticker I saw in town that said 'oh crap, you're going to cheer me up aren't you?' seems to fit perfectly into my set of mind at the time.

"But you need to get promission," I brought up the back of my hand in full intention to wipe my nose on it.

Camus whipped up his hand that was covered with a handkerchief. He wiped at my eyes and nose like a mother, making me a bit annoyed at being treated like a child. "I'll get it, but I want you to promiss me that we'll have fun tomorrow," he spoke tucking away the handkerchief.

I nodded, "Okay."

"No, say it. We'll have fun tomorrow."

"We'll... try to have fun tomorrow."

"Milo," he glared.

"We'll have fun tomorrow."

"That's better," he rested his forhead against mine and patted my shoulder. "Now then, I want you to take a warm bath, I'll get you some clothes and you're going to eat after that."

"Jello."

"And soup," he started to walk me to the bathing room.

"I don't want soup."

"You're not going to get jello with out having some soup."

"You'd make a great mother." I winced from the swat to the back of the head that comment earned me. I managed to smile ever so slightly. Why did he have to reach out while others didn't? Guess that's one of the many reasons why I cared for him.

To Be Continued...

Note: Not bad, not really all that good. Next chapter will be nice and fun, Camus gets Milo back to his hyper self again. I'll probably end it with a cliffhanger, but you never know.

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