The Killer in You

Note: Most of this chapter – thoughts and dialogues – has been rewritten from the manga (fan translation). The language of those fragments seems awkward to me, but since I wanted to stay true to the manga and I am not a native speaker, I avoided rewording it.


Chapter 57 (starting with page 90*): Two Choices
* link to the page: http://www.thespectrum.net/manga_scans/death_note/


November 5, 2004

Crack! A panda-shaped chocolate snapped under Ryuzaki’s teeth while the detective’s huge eyes stared blankly at the screens before him.

“From the instant that Amane became free…” he started thoughtfully.

“Ryuzaki, you’re still thinking about that,” Light interrupted. “Misa doesn’t have anything to do with this. Even so, she was suspected of being the Second Kira. Even if she happened to have Kira’s power, using it at a time like this would just be stupid.”

“That’s also true…” Ryuzaki admitted, reaching for another chocolate.

“As Light says, Ryuzaki, you should just forget about Amane.” Soichiro Yagami backed his son. “‘If the person using the note fails to write the names of people to be killed within thirteen days of each other, then the user will die.’ We can see from this that Amane wasn’t the Second Kira.”

“Yeah,” Aizawa nodded. “Ryuzaki, you’re being stubborn in your reasoning and you keep trying to bring it over to your own way of thinking.”

“Yes… I’m sorry.” L’s eyes half closed with tired determination. “Well, if there is another notebook and someone is using it, then I will most definitely capture that person.”

Rem listened to this conversation with growing anxiety. It was clear that in spite of these words, Ryuzaki wasn’t at all convinced to drop his suspicions about Misa. No wonder he was suspecting her, the premises were obvious. While the others were blinded by the 13-day rule, L was smart enough to see this fake proof as a contradiction.

Why did Misa continue killing, anyway? Like Light observed, it was sheer idiocy, it was like wearing a shirt with a statement: ‘I am Kira’. Misa wasn’t stupid… not half as smart as Light Yagami or L, but not stupid at all; she wouldn’t have come out with such an idea herself. Did it mean that someone suggested it to her? The only person who could do it was Light. Rem’s gaze shot to the teen. Was it possible? Why?

“However,” the chief inspector mused, “just having your name written in the notebook can kill you. If it’s just the killing of the criminals, then we can’t look for them like we looked for Higuchi.”

“That’s true,” Matsuda agreed.

“We know how they kill,” Ryuzaki stated. “If anyone appears in the least suspicious, we will detain him or her and search him or her thoroughly for the notebook.”

Light smiled wickedly at those words. As much as it escaped everyone else’s attention, Rem watched him closely. Light Yagami, are you thinking that you are safe now?

“But Ryuzaki,” the youth spoke, “the murderer’s notebook… I believe in it as well, but if you were able to capture the person who was writing the names, will you be able to properly convict him as a mass murderer?”

“I cannot demonstrate it… without verifying the notebook. But that does not matter to me. If the case can be solved, then I will leave the rest up to the Ministry of Justice.”

“No, wait, it should be a given that they would be convicted without having to test the notebook!”

“Matsuda, in order to do that, we would have to have a trial and put out the murderer’s notebook as a proof for the law,” Soichiro Yagami pointed out.

As always, Ryuzaki had a solution.

“If the murderer by notebook is recognized, at the very least, if we can’t get the capital punishment, we would have them write their own name in the book. That’s how it is. Well, that’s a conversation we should have after we capture them. It’s not something we should be thinking about right now.”

Rem felt a shiver running though her body. It was as simple as it was brilliant. However, Light’s secret smile didn’t fade. It widened even more, and his shoulders stirred minimally as if in a suppressed smirk. Rem tilted her head. L had just found a way to test the Death Note and Kira was happy about it?

What are you thinking, Light Yagami? If Misa is caught then you yourself will… She stirred with a sudden realization. So that’s what it was. What a guy. The one who is killing the convicts right now is Misa. There is no doubt about that. Since the notebook has been revealed, no matter what happens from this point on, the one who will be caught as Kira will be Misa. That won’t change… Light Yagami is confident that I will save Misa’s life. The only way to save Misa in a situation like that would be for me to write Ryuzaki’s name in the notebook. Killing Light Yagami isn’t a solution, Misa cannot be saved. She will be driven more quickly into a corner. More than that, she will lose all will to live. On the other hand, if Ryuzaki disappears, the one who holds the power to run the headquarters would be Light and he can control the investigation in a way that would not lead to Misa. Even revealing everything I know now would most likely not make Misa’s sin any lighter. Collusion will undoubtedly lead to capital punishment…

However, Light told me once not to kill Ryuzaki until he says so. So he can’t assume that I will do it when not asked; that can’t be his plan. Plus, if I kill Ryuzaki, wouldn’t it be suspicious? I will die and they will most likely realize that I was the one who took his life. If Kira’s shinigami suddenly kills the only person who suspects Misa, it might actually draw the others’ suspicion to her instead of clearing her. Ryuzaki must die, that’s the only option, but Light probably has his own plan how to do it without casting suspicions on Misa and himself. So… perhaps what he expects me to do is not kill Ryuzaki, but give him means to do it… Give him Ryuzaki’s name. It’s against the rules, but it’s a lesser crime than saving Misa directly. Maybe this way I will save my own life as well.

Is that what you want me to do, Light Yagami? Even if it isn’t, it’s the best thing I can think of right now. Surely for Light it’s much more convenient than if I killed L myself.

* * *
His tea was cooling down, forgotten on the panel. Next to it, lay the notebook, their acquisition from the round-up, and it was at the moment attracting all L’s attention. It was open – on a page from which a piece was cut off. Ryuzaki’s mind was working at full speed.

There were things that were gained by talking to the shinigami, but the important parts that I wanted answers to were always ‘I don’t know’. When I asked if you could kill with a piece of paper that was cut out, the answer was again ‘I don’t know’. If you could kill people by writing on a cut-off piece of the notebook… It’s not impossible…

A picture appeared in his mind. Picture from the camera monitoring Light Yagami’s room a few months ago. Light sitting at his desk. Studying. Writing. His hand reaching into the bag of chips now and again. Disappearing there for about three seconds every time. Three seconds to take a crisp?

If you can do that, then if you are careful, you can kill everywhere and anytime. You could have even killed Higuchi at that spot…

Another picture, a very fresh one. Him and Light in the helicopter. He didn’t really observe his prime suspect all the time. Light had a chance to turn and scribble Higuchi’s name on a little piece of paper he could hide positively everywhere… But that would mean that at that moment Light already had his memory back. So fast? How could that happen? When? Something had to stir it. Ryuzaki twitched. What if… what if it was touching the notebook? If it made you see a shinigami, it surely had some… supernatural impact. Maybe it could return your memories too. The piercing, horrified shriek Light gave out back then seemed something more than just a reaction upon seeing Rem. But that would mean – L’s gaze found Light and he struggled to keep his face blank, as it suddenly wanted to twist – that would mean that he was already dealing with Kira again.

However, if someone who has written in that notebook once does not write in it again within thirteen days, that person will die. The murderer’s notebook… it’s a given that it should have at least that much compensation… And Light Yagami and Misa Amane are still alive. Even if it’s a cut-off piece of the notebook, if you write a name on it, the person with that name will die. But thirteen days… that’s the only thing…

It hurt to think that Light was Kira again, it hurt like hell. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to bring this case to the end. And to do that he had to act. Quickly.

* * *
Ryuzaki leaned to the comm-unit and pressed the button.

“It doesn’t matter which country. Let’s negotiate with them. If we get the proper approval, there should be no problem. We will have them use this notebook in an execution.”

A few gasps sounded in the room. The policemen, as expected, were shocked.

“You mean to test it?!” Soichiro Yagami exclaimed.

“Impossible. Even if you don’t do that now, isn’t the power of this notebook real?”

“In any case, who’s going to write in it? Once you write in it, you’ll have to continue doing it in a 13-day cycle for the rest of your life!”

L stared at the panel, without gracing them a glance. He looked slightly exasperated, but when he spoke, his voice was even. “The one who will write in the notebook will be the one who has at least thirteen days until their execution and if they are living after thirteen days, they will be absolved of their execution. That is the legal trade that we will make.”

Rem watched the scene from the place where she stood, at the moment forgotten. She didn’t like this turn of events the slightest bit… but she’d known this moment would come, hadn’t she? The moment she would have to act. If they do that, then the lie about thirteen days will come to light and the innocence of Misa will be doubted… If it is doubted, then the matter concerning the video, the notebook, the story of the eyes, the story of the shinigami… it will all lead back to her.

Ryuzaki seemed unmoved by the commotion his actions caused in the room. He leaned to the comm again. “Watari, contact the heads of all the states which fit into that situation.”

This time it was Aizawa, who raised the loudest protest.

“Ryuzaki! That’s unreasonable. Wait. What do you plan by doing that right now?”

Actually it was very reasonable, but no one except for the detective seemed to acknowledge it.

“It would be a verification of the murderer’s notebook, of course,” Ryuzaki stated with the condescending patience that was reserved for dumb questions.

Rem moved towards the wall, trying to remain as inconspicuous and invisible as she had been for the last few minutes. If they continued to prod L with their unnecessary moral correctness, they should be distracted for a while longer. Five minutes at most – it was all she needed.

There are no cameras in the private rooms, so it's easy for me to sneak out while no one is looking and leave Light a note… I will give you this name, Light Yagami, but I still hate you. The way you used Misa… if she wasn’t so deeply in love in you, I would have simply killed you instead.

With that, she stepped through the wall.

* * *
They received the answer just a couple of hours later.

“Ryuzaki, all is settled,” Watari announced over the comm. “Fortunately we don’t have to look for help in another country. The Japanese government has allowed us to test the notebook here.”

Light barely managed to stifle a gasp that threatened to escape him. His hand tightened on the panel as he struggled to keep his cool composure. This was happening fast. Too fast.

Next to him, Ryuzaki was eating some red jelly and spoke with his mouth full.

“Great. Have they already chosen the convict who will be writing in the notebook?”

“They have. He is due to be executed in exactly two weeks. The prisoner whose name will be written is scheduled to be executed tomorrow, exactly thirteen days before the scheduled execution of the writer-convict. So, not to shorten any of their lives, it was decided that we will run the test tomorrow.”

“Good. You know the objectives, don’t you?”

“Yes, I will settle everything as you told me.”

“Thank you.”

L disconnected and swiveled in his chair to face the others. Light turned around as well. The team stared at the detective, standing in one-line front as if they wanted to fight him. Ryuzaki looked at them, undisturbed by their silent defiance.

“As you heard,” he spoke, “Watari managed to come to terms with the government and they agreed to test the Death Note the way we want to. Watari will take the notebook today and deliver it to the place where it will be tested. For safety reasons, only he and I will know the name of the convict who will write in the notebook. If in two weeks the man dies, I will publicly declare my mistake about suspecting Misa Amane. And it will be final, at least on my part. Are you satisfied with such an outcome?”

They murmured quietly between themselves. Their could-be protests were silenced by L’s promise. Of course, they believed Misa was innocent, and the final confirmation from the grand detective was exactly what they needed.

Finally Light’s father spoke up. “If that means that you drop your suspicions about Amane… and my son, then I suppose I can accept that.”

“Yes, I will drop suspicions about your son as well, Yagami-san.”

Aizawa nodded. “Then I agree to that too.”

Matsuda nodded uncertainly, and Mogi remained silent. But he didn’t protest. The mask on Light’s face was perfect, but inside him rose panic. Dammit, what should he do? Rem, don’t you know that now is your part to play? On impulse, he cast a glance at the shinigami— and was surprised by the look on her face. It wasn’t unrest, or shock as he’d expected. It was self-assured calm. Rem nodded minimally at him and Light was momentarily flooded by relief. She knew.


Author’s note: From this point the story splits. Version A (chapters 3 to 6) is the one I wrote first. It’s simpler and more romantic. Version B (chapter 7 to 13) has in my opinion better (more complicated, more twisted) plot and is more in character. That’s the version I consider main, so please read it first, otherwise version A may work as unnecessary spoiler. Sorry to make you jump like that, it’s because – like I said – I wrote version A first.