With All of My Heart

“I made you up something for dinner,” Usagi chirped happily, “it's nothing fancy, I'm afraid.”

Mamoru smiled. “Don't worry about it. You go out and have fun, I do still know how to feed myself.”

Usagi ran over and gave her husband a quick kiss before running for the door again. “We'll probably only be gone until the day after tomorrow, but I will call you if that changes.”

It was summer, and the girls had decided to take a trip together. Seeing how excited Usagi was made Mamoru happy. He loved her more than words could describe. She was everything to him, so why had he spent most of the passed day thinking about...

“Mamoru? Are you alright?”

Mamoru shook his head. “It's nothing, don't worry about it.”

“You're going to miss me, aren't you? I'll miss you too, but it won't be for long.” She did up her shoes as she spoke, trying to hurry as Makoto and Ami were waiting downstairs.

“I'll survive. Have a good time.”

Usagi nodded happily and then hurriedly grabbed her bags. “I'll see you later!”

“Later.”

As soon as the door closed, Mamoru let out a breath he had been holding. He made his way to the sofa, plopped down on it, and closed his eyes. Did he want to try and remember this? He found that the more memories he found of his past life, the more he could remember with ease. 'It's only my past life, it means nothing in this one,' he reasoned with himself. What was done, was done after all.

Remembering the past was always a little awkward. It was as if you were watching a movie, but from the perspective of one of the actors, except that actor is you, but you've never seen the film before. Mamoru always had found it difficult to describe.

He started by thinking about what he already knew. The golden palace, its halls, the people. Familiar faces from so long ago. Familiar in this memory at least, which still felt like someone else's.

He was walking down one of the halls. Every servant that he passed would bow, odd how that felt natural and foreign at the same time. He could see two very familiar faces at the end of the hall. Kunzite and Zoisite were speaking together and then looked his way as he approached. A small smile crept onto Zoisite's face, while Kunzite's was much more mischievous.

“I hope you're not going to make me choose tonight,” Mamoru heard his other self say.

Kunzite's grin grew wider at this. “Not if you don't want to.”

He threw a look at Kunzite that was, while playful, also commanding. “But I'm calling the shots this time.”

A knock at his door, startled Mamoru back into the present. He got up to answer it, not really having time to process what he had just seen. As he pulled open the door, he was surprised to see Zoisite standing on the other side, though he wore street clothes and a magical illusion hid his true hair colour and length. “Zoisite, please come in,” Mamoru said as he opened the door up.

“I hope I'm not disturbing you,” his guardian said as he entered the apartment.

“Not at all,” Mamoru replied. “Would you like anything? I could make some tea.”

Zoisite shook his head, “no, that's alright, Master. Is the Princ... I mean, Usagi not home?”

Mamoru gestured that Zoisite should take a seat, but knew that the man would only sit after Mamoru had himself. His slip in speech and difficultly in dropping the formalities made Mamoru wonder briefly just how much of the past Zoisite was still clinging to.

“No, she and the girls are spending some time together.”

“I see.” Zoisite was looking off to the side, and he fidgeted nervously, Mamoru noted. That wasn't like him.

“Is something wrong?”

“No. Nothing,” his reply came too quickly.

Mamoru couldn't help but think that it was Zoisite who look uncomfortable and not himself. '[i]After all, I was the one that saw him...[/i]' He stopped himself there. That was not a train of thought he needed to go down right now. “Not that I mind, but what brings you here then?”

“Well...” Zoisite looked down at his hands, at the floor, the door to the room, anywhere that wasn't at Mamoru himself. He couldn't help but think that maybe he had been spotted last night and Zoisite was trying to figure out a way to mention it. “Besides the final battle and the Princess, have you remembered... anything else from the past life?”

Mamoru's breath caught in his throat. So it was about that after all. Deciding to play it safe for now however, Mamoru asked for specifics. “Bits and pieces I suppose. Is there something important I should know?”

“No, no. It's not important,” Zoisite stood then and bowed. “I'm sorry I bothered you, Master. I'll be leaving.”

Zoisite turned and left the room so quickly, Mamoru barely had time to react. He too got out of his seat. “Zoisite, wait.” The Tennou stopped and looked over his shoulder. There was a spark of hope in his eye, and Mamoru suddenly had the urge to explain that he knew, that he thought he knew what was going on. “Please. I... need to tell you something.”

Zoisite returned to his seat, and Mamoru was suddenly the one on edge in the room. It was his turn to avoid eye contact. “I should start by apologizing.”

“Master?”

He took a deep breath before continuing. “Last night I went over to your house. I didn't bother knocking, I... heard and saw some things I probably shouldn't have.”

Mamoru waited. How would Zoisite react to this? Any normal person would be outraged that someone had spied on them during such an act, but Zoisite was far from a normal person. In fact, Mamoru couldn't even fathom Zoisite being overly upset about anything. Then again, until very recently, he also wouldn't have been able to fathom Zoisite and Kunzite being sexual with each other.

“How much did you hear?”

This made Mamoru look up. Zoisite was looking at him so intently, hope still in his eyes. It shocked Mamoru that he didn't look the least bit upset. “Well... enough, I guess.”

“Do you remember any of it?”

What had Mamoru been remembering anyway? A conversation between himself, Zoisite and Kunzite. Had it been related to this? “No, I don't think so,” he said, a bit unsure of himself.

“Do you want to?”

“I...” True, that was what he had been trying to do right before Zoisite showed up, but did he really want to now? “I don't know... I'm afraid of what it means.”

Zoisite looked down, a little disappointed perhaps. “It doesn't have to mean anything, Master. I know that things are different now compared to how they used to be.”

It seemed safe enough. These were events that had already happened, and that others around him already knew about. It only made sense that he should remember them as well, if at all possible. “Alright. What should I do?”

Zoisite got up out of his seat, and Mamoru wondered for a moment if he should do the same. “Just relax, and close your eyes.”

He did as requested, or relaxed as well as he could. He took a couple slow, deep breaths before Zoisite spoke again. “Try and think about the past, the happier times.”

He thought that he could hear the distant sound of the piano, but before he could be certain, Mamoru was back in that hallway, speaking with the two more senior members of his Shitennou. “But I'm calling the shots this time,” he heard himself say again. His comment was met with a knowing smile from Zoisite, and a raised eyebrow from Kunzite.

“As you wish, Master,” the elder of the two replied, before gesturing that the prince should lead the way.

If he were put back in the Earth Palace now, Mamoru doubted that he would be able to find his way around, but Endymion had no problem, and navigated the many halls with ease. Eventually, he stopped at a door, and Mamoru realized that it must be his bedroom. This room he was familiar with, as it had been recreated for him while he was in the Dark Kingdom. The only difference was that this room was much brighter, and had an almost golden shine to it.

Once his entourage was also inside, he closed and locked the door. Kunzite closed the distance between them quickly, close enough that Mamoru felt uncomfortable, but Endymion didn't seem to mind as much. Feeling two sets of emotions at once was another odd effect of remembering the past.

“Now, then,” the Tennou leader said, his lips almost brushing with Endymion's own.

He reached up and brought his fingers to Kunzite's lips, stopping him from landing the kiss. “Have you forgotten already?” he asked.

Kunzite backed off a few inches. It was obvious that he preferred to be the one in control, even with his own Prince. Seeing as how that wasn't going to be the case tonight, Kunzite waited until given further instruction, not hiding his displeasure.

Endymion gave him an understanding grin, and then looked over at Zoisite, who was patiently awaiting his orders. Looking back at Kunzite then, Endymion said, “why don't you start with him instead?”

Kunzite's eyes lit back up and Endymion relocated himself to a plush sofa and watched the two with a satisfied grin. Kunzite immediately went for Zoisite's lips with the speed of a serpent. The white-haired Tennou showed wide eyed surprise at this sudden move, but it didn't take him long to almost melt into Kunzite's embrace.

Endymion just watched them. Piece by piece, the two Tennou undressed each other. Slowly at first, but soon their actions showed their desperation. Endymion smiled to himself, and began removing the less comfortable items from his own uniform. A low groan from Zoisite caused Endymion to look up curiously. Unfortunately, Zoisite's back was to him.

“Kunzite, I can't see what you're doing,” he said. “Zoisite, why don't you sit next to me?”

Zoisite looked over his shoulder. The look in his eyes told Endymion that whatever it was Kunzite had been doing to him, he didn't want it to stop any time soon. “Yes, Master,” he replied, and as soon as Kunzite released him, he joined Endymion on the sofa.

The only piece of Zoisite's clothing that remained in place were his white trousers, but those too were undone. Kunzite still managed to keep his jacket, though it hung open as well. After Zoisite was seated comfortably, Endymion noticed that Kunzite was moving to join them, but he turned and took Zoisite's lips with his own before Kunzite could reach them.

Remembering such close and intimate moments like this was new for Mamoru. Everything felt very real, as if it were really happening now. He could feel Kunzite slide onto the sofa behind him, and his lips were on his neck and his hands reached around to remove what Endymion had not yet gotten around to. Soon Kunzite's bare hands had slipped under the fabric of his shirt and played with a nipple while Endymion continued to kiss a rather lustful Zoisite.

Most of his concentration was on Zoisite, so when Kunzite's hand found its way into his pants, the sudden contact surprised Endymion, and he broke his kiss with Zoisite. He knew then that his plan to keep control of the situation away from Kunzite had failed. As soon as Kunzite began to stroke up and down, Endymion had fallen right into his hands.

Kunzite's breath was hot on his neck and Endymion couldn't help but tilt his chin up and rest his head back against Kunzite's shoulder. “Should I take that to mean that I can do as I please then, Master?” he purred in Endymion's ear.

“Go ahead.”

“Then why don't you lie back? Make yourself comfortable.”

Endymion felt Kunzite pull away and off the sofa, and so he obliged. Zoisite crawled on top of him then, straddling his hips. He gave Endymion a soft smile before beginning a trail of kisses at his collarbone and traveling down his chest. Now that Kunzite was no longer stroking him, Endymion was aching for some kind of contact. Zoisite drew closer, but was moving far too slow for Endymion's liking. He started to reach down in hopes of persuading Zoisite to pick up the pace when he heard Kunzite chuckle.

“Zoisite, don't keep the Master waiting.”

Zoisite looked up into Endymion's eyes then and apparently saw the desire that must have been in his expression. Mamoru could feel every part of it. “My apologies,” Zoisite said, sliding down the rest of the way.

Endymion didn't have a chance to say anything before he felt Zoisite's warm mouth around him. Mamoru knew that he too had gasped then, but he didn't particularly care.

Something caused Zoisite to moan, and Endymion to respond in like as a result. He opened his eyes just enough to see that Kunzite had situation himself behind Zoisite. While he couldn't actually see what Kunzite was doing exactly, Endymion had a couple theories.

“So you both like that, I take it?” Kunzite said, with a satisfied grin on his face. Mamoru could see that Kunzite moved his arm a bit then, causing Zoisite to moan again. This time his eyes opened for a brief moment before closing again as if he was trying to focus. “Don't forget what you are supposed to be doing,” Kunzite reminded him.

Zoisite's breathing had deepened, and his moaning betrayed his own desire that needed to be fulfilled. At the same time however, Zoisite's vocalizations were producing a lovely sensation for Endymion. A sensation that was pushing him closer to the brink. He didn't want this to end so quickly for him, but he couldn't bear to tell Zoisite to stop.

“He's ready for you, Master,” Kunzite's voice said.

“I... I don't think that I can...”

Mamoru opened his eyes and cried out when he felt his orgasm grab hold of him. The intensity of it was shocking. It took him a minute after his body began to calm again to realize what had happened exactly. He was back in the here and now. The piano music he thought he had heard at one point had vanished. Zoisite sat next to him in his Tennou form, though fully clothed in his uniform.

“I'm sorry,” Zoisite said, just as Mamoru was coming to the same realization. “Sometimes the memories can feel a bit too real.”

Mamoru sat up then, uncertain as to what he should do next. “Excuse me,” he said quietly, before standing and leaving the room quickly for his bedroom.