The first time

Jishe, dear, stay hopeful, I like you that way. Barrie18, you have many questions, rightful ones. Here\'s one direct answer: I was referring to Guy\'s promise to Raoul, to avoid hurting Iason. For the rest, read on. :)







Riki was sitting on a stone ledge, out in the open, outside the overwhelming structure, rising menacingly behind him. He allowed himself to bask into the soft light of the two moons, his features softening. Letting the wind caress his cheek, he admitted to himself with a whisper:

- I missed that.

Guy came to his side, tentatively.

- Do you want to be alone? If so, just say, and I will get the hell out.

- No, stay, Guy. I bet you have many things to ask.

His former pairing partner took a seat, leaving his arm brush over Riki’s. They both stood like that for a while. Riki was the first to speak:

- Have I told you, ever, what Ayrie told me when she was taken away from Guardian, Guy?

The man shook his head in negation.

- She told me that we only have two hands and there are only two things we can hold on to, in this life.

He sighed and Guy watched him quizically.

- I begin, only now, to understand what she meant.

- What are you saying to me, man?

- I always liked to believe I am a proud man, but that Blondie tarnished my pride to an extent I don’t think I have anything left.

Guy grabbed Riki suddenly in his arms, but the black haired mongrel did not respond in kind, much to his dismay. But Guy didn’t let go:

- You’re Riki, no one can ever change that! Fuck that asshole!

When Guy let go, finally, Riki placed an apologetic palm over Guy’s hand.

- But I am changing, Guy, and you are, as well. Maybe you are not aware of this, but you are. Your Blondie did it.

- My Blondie?!

Riki sighed again.

- My pride, yes, it was one thing that I used to hold on to. And the other one was my freedom. And now, because I know you will not ask, I will tell you that, somehow, …. I left you behind. Not because you weren’t important, but maybe because I was too stupid to realize that Ayrie was right. I gave up on my pride the night Iason poisoned you, because I wanted to save you, and there was no way to keep my pride and you with the same hand.

Riki’s features were marred by sadness.

- So, you see, Guy, I’m really stupid.

- Why are you saying that?

- Because, tonight, I chose freedom.

Unspoken words floated like poisoned gas between the two. So Guy just stood up and left.



Raoul was awaken by the buzz of the intercom. A hardened face appeared on the screen. It was Katze.

- Daryl is on his way to your house. Pack up your medical bag. Iason is badly hurt. He cannot be moved.

No time for asking, he jumped to his feet, his mind reeling. “What happened?” A fleeting hurting thought passed his mind. Guy! He rushed to the door, still half dressed, just in time to answer to Daryl.

- I’m on my way.



In the sterile environment of Katze’s hide-out, Raoul moved quickly and efficiently. Mute, Daryl and Katze served as his assistants, and they were good at it. Iason was shot badly, and he had lost a lot of blood. Stabilizing him had been a pain in the ass, but Raoul succeeded.

- We will wait now.

Raoul took Katze aside and asked in a low tone.

- Where did you find him, Katze? What’s with all this mystery?

- He was in a brothel in Midas, Raoul.

- How…?

- Riki called.

- And him?

- For now, nowhere to be found.

Dark realization hit Raoul in the pit of his stomach. The bile gutted in his throat. “Guy, what have you done?” And it was not just hurt there, but anguish and fear, too. “Why did you lie to me? Have you felt nothing for me, at all?”



Sitting on a cot, in one of the scarcely appointed rooms of Dana Bahn, Riki held his eyes closed. He thought about Iason, and he could not escape the feeling of dread. “He cannot be dead! Katze must’ve saved him!” But he could not opress the dark clogging his heart, thinking that he might never see Iason again.

In the stillness of the room, Guy moved towards him. He snuggled close to Riki, embracing him and kissing him, but Riki did not respond.

- Why are you so cold, Riki? The plea in his voice was painful.

- Guy, please.

- What did he do to you? Was sex with him so great that you cannot stand me touching you?

- It would be a lie, Guy, and you know it.

- No, I don’t! I want to hear it from you!

And Guy pressed over Riki’s body, groping him, kissing the tight lips, biting in despair. Riki felt a surge of anger through his body and flipped Guy over, rising to his feet.

- I don’t want to say it! But you are pushing me! I wasn’t in love with you! You can kill me, if you want, for using you, but know one thing, Guy! I cared about you, I still do! For so many years, you have been ‘home’ to me! But it makes me want to crawl out of my skin, thinking that you might have killed him!

Guy was sitting on his ass, his eyes cast down, not daring to face Riki.

- Do you think this is easy for me? I should have told you, but I did not know it myself!

- What, Riki? Guy’s voice was nothing but a whisper, his body cringing at the words that he was about to hear.

- I … am in love with that Blondie asshole!

A loud growl came of Guy’s throat. Riki pleaded with him.

- I don’t know what’s wrong with me, Guy! The things he did to me … I thought I hated him with all my heart! But he sneaked inside, somehow, always breaching my defenses, he carved into me his crazy passion! I cheated on him, with Mimea, in spite, but, when he punished me, and I realized I was losing him, … it dawned on me. That, all the time I tried to push him away, I became aware of his constant obsession over me, and it drew me, poor moth to the flame! Trust me, Guy, being free, being here with you, makes me think it was all a dream! But I’m thinking about him, and I hate myself, … and even you, because you took me away from him!

- No, Riki, please!

- I’m sorry, Guy, it’s all my fault! Don’t blame yourself!

And now he dared aproach Guy and hold him, trying to give assurance, as best as he could.



The next day, Riki awoke to the sound of laughters. Guy entered the room and said, all a smile:

- The boys from Bison are here, Riki.

He grabbed him by the shoulders.

- Your choice for freedom will not be in vain. Be our leader, once again!

And Riki felt his shredded pride raising in his gut; his eyes gleamed passionately, making Guy respond with a smile.

- We both have our sins to chew on. But leave them for later! Now, get ready to become again Riki the Dark!