Broken Thread

Lost in the Woods

Snow covered the ground as we began our walk, warm sun turning the crystals under our feet to slush. My feet quickly became numb from the melting, watery snow seeping into my boots. Robin seemed to be having a difficult time picking one foot up, moving the other in foreword. “Robin.” She flinched, her head snapping up quickly. “Can you go on?” She nodded, beginning to walk again. She did not get far before I saw her stumble. Reaching out my arms, I caught her before her gloved hand could touch the snow. “Wrap your arms around me” I ordered, carrying her like a small child against my chest. This woman, so lite, I barely feel her in my arms. “Can you think warm thoughts? Warm us up a bit?” I tried to nudge a smile from her. She nodded, closing her eyes and wrapping her arms tightly about my neck. Before long, the warmth of our bodies spreads through me. My steps became easier, the weight of my charge barely registering in my arms.

“I see the border check ahead,” I tell Robin, hoping to easy her mind. The check station was little more than a hut, painted the yellow of a three day old bruise set beside a wooden fence. ‘This is what they are protecting, one lone dirt road leading to nowhere?’

Two guards ran out yelling at me in staccato voices. I only understood a few words here and there, but their demeanor spoke volumes. “We are looking for someone” I began before one guard jerked Robin from the safety of my arms, her feet hitting the ground, her head still against me. “Huh?” she squeaked, still half asleep.

****

Being in Amon’s arms, the steady rocking back and forth, the warmth of our bodies must have lulled me to sleep. I dreamed of smoke. Cigarette smoke, wood smoke, the smoke from the incense used in the temples, grey, stifling smoke like a pillow against my nose. This life, my life, was supposed to be a beacon to others like us, a fire in the night so to speak. So far, I had put off little more than smoke.

I was jerked from my warm sleep, my feet hitting freezing water. I felt Amon holding onto my arm while someone else pulled on my other arm. Voices boomed, excited, angry sounds.

Amon caught me on the way to the ground when I began to fall. I still did not know who had me or what was going on but the smoke in my senses was beginning to clear. Looking up, I saw the guard shack and the Russian emblem on the shoulder of one guard. It was then I realized how far Amon had carried me. I turned to gaze at him, amazed once more by his strength but was rudely jerked away once more toward the shack. “Take care Robin, cooperate and I will be with you as soon as I can.” I heard him call out to me. Considering I had two options at that moment, one being to burn down the pine forest about us, going with the guard seemed the safer bet.

He led me into the shack, and I discovered it to be quite warm and cozy. The guard led me to one of two doors against the back wall showing me in roughly. For some reason, maybe due to the lack of sleep in the last several weeks or because I knew Amon was close by, I felt no threat from this man. Looking closer at him, I realized he could not be much older than me. Perhaps he was out here in this lonely outpost because he was just beginning his career? I never had the chance to find out. He sat across a long table from me, just staring and never moving. I felt time tick by, seeing the moments of my life slip away like smoke up a chimney. He seemed to be mesmerized, never moving his wide eyed stare from my eyes. After awhile, it just infuriated me. “Where is Amon? Why are we being held?” His jaw dropped, he leaned in closer to me and that is when I saw what he had been staring at the whole time. Yellow, orange flames licked his irises, reflecting the unbidden flame dancing about in my own. “We are leaving now, understand?” I commanded, voice solid even as my legs shook beneath my skirt. The young man stood and moved toward the door opening it for me the way a gentle man would.


****

In broken Russian pieced together with the Chinese tongue, I tried to tell the guard we were looking for someone. Bringing out the slip of paper the driver handed Robin earlier, the guard snatched the paper from my hand, greedily reading the artistic lines.

I guess he did not like what he saw. I saw his arm fly up, before angle toward my face. I was not about to take any abuse from this flunky, moving my head easily as he plummeted toward me. The look in his eyes when realization kissed his mind, made it apparent he was not used to not getting his way. He flailed on his way down, trying to catch himself on the corner of the table, pulling papers over on his head.

He pulled himself up quickly, reaching for me once more. “Empty your pockets!” he bellowed. I could take this man in less than three movements and be on my way but I had no idea where Robin was. I complied but not willingly. There lay the contents of my life. A no longer working cell phone, blocking me from communicating with the rest of the world, wallet with an I.D. bearing my picture but not the name Robin called me, keys to a luxurious room I could not enter and my gun, kept to protect us. The irony of it all left its taste in my mouth.

The guard searched through my meager things, all that was left of an accomplished life I had left behind. “You are lover with this girl?” he smirked, sliding his eyes to me, searching for a reaction. Gripping my hands about the edge of the tabletop, I spat out “No.” He did not believe me, raising an eyebrow before asking, “Kidnap maybe?” I would not let his taunting bother me. I knew how I felt about Robin. She was my ward, that and simply that.

He began a series of questions in rapid Russian, most I had no way of understanding, much less a way to respond. He began his train of attempted intimidation, swatting at me with a short, thin stick. His blows contacted my face twice, splitting the skin like a whip cutting the air. I could feel the welts rise up but ignored the pain. My greatest concern at the time was finding Robin and escaping this. When we were first ‘greeted’ outside the shack, the muzzle of his rifle stuck deep between my ribs convinced me to let her go without me. Concentrating on her helped me deal with the pain. No answer I gave satisfied the man and he was determined to find something.

He raised his hand to me once more, daring me to speak. This man was more show than substance and I felt no danger from him. Growing tired of this childish game, I slowly stood bracing myself against the table. His face turned the same sickly yellow as the building itself. He knew he was about to be bested.

“You have no power over me” I let him know. He curled into himself, trying to push his body away from me. “Sasha!” he bellowed over his shoulder to his comrade. The door flew open, revealing an excited ‘Sasha’, his face beaming. “Iyosif it is she! It is Eva!” ‘Iyosif’ was quite perplexed becoming more so as we saw Robin walk in the door behind Sasha, unscathed. My ward ran to me, tossing off her normal cloak of proper demeanor, slipping her arms about my waist, laying her head on my chest like a child seeking comfort from her father.

Sasha chattered on, as Iyosif’s face changed color once again, this time a shade of red I have only seen on tiny, new plums.

“Amon!” Robin whispered, tugging on my sleeve. Turning to look her in the face, I saw the small, white flame rising and falling in her eyes. What was going on? Was she losing her grip? No, I could see her control as the flames never crept any higher.

She pulled on my arm again, pulling my attention toward her words. “Sasha knows who I am!” Robin whispered, standing on her toes to reach me. I felt a momentary tightening of my stomach before Sasha slapped me on the back.

“Drink, da?” he held up a bottle of clear liquid, taking a swig before offering it to me. I declined, keeping an eye on Iyosif. He looked none to happy. Walking over to Sasha, Iyosif jerked the bottle from the younger man’s grasp. “Iyosif, why did you do that? We are honored to have her here! She is our savior, the one that will bring about the new age of freedom and equality for us all!”

I take a cup of the clear liquid, holding it more than drinking. Things stayed in this surrealistic frame with our captors alternately celebrating our arrival and glaring at us, never trusting us.

****

Sasha poured more and more vodka for Amon, calling his family, his friends, anyone who would listen to him. Amon drank, conciliatory sips belying his true intake. While Sasha would celebrate, Iyosif still glared at Amon and me, chilling the fire I have inside of me.

My stomach gurgled. “Eva, you are hungry?” Sasha was doing his best to take care of me. Within moments, he had arranged for a feast to be brought to me. Suddenly, a noise from the corner, Iyosif stood a look in his eyes that spelt trouble. He snapped a small whip he had held concealed in his hand. “Call your sister back, tell her not to come. You have made a big mistake. This is not your Eva you search for, only an imposter” he finished. I look over to Amon and saw a familiar hard look on his face. He was in defense mode with only a moment needed to change to attack. I readied myself, watching for his signal.

“What do you mean Iyosif? Of course she is the one. She of the fire eyes!” Almost imperceptibly, Amon pulled his personal things from the table top. “Iyosif, brother! Why are you acting like this?” Amon grabbed me by my wrist, ‘shh’ silently on his lips as I listened to the conversation between the two men. Sash began “We should be honore…” but never finished, Iyosif cracked Sasha across his cheek with the back of his hand. Amon reacted, moving from his chair, pulling me along, dashing out the door as Iyosif continued to attack Sasha.

Out into the main room, out the front door, Amon pulled me. I do not believe my feet touched the floor, but only flew behind me. The cold night air burned my lungs as I tried to gulp it in. “Come along Robin!” I look up to Amon, he moves so fast, he does not look as if he is actually touching the ground. Together we must have appeared as a great black raven, pulling along his catch.

We rounded the corner as we hear three gun shots from the guard hut. I could feel Sasha beginning to fade from this world and it caused me to stop in my tracks. “Get in!” Amon ordered me, flinging us into the cab of a military truck. I crawled on my hands and knees across the bench seat, trying to keep my head down. Amon fiddled with some wires underneath the dash, bringing the monster to life with a roar. “Stay down!” he commanded me, pushing the old stick shift into gear. With a loud groan, the truck began to move.

“Stop! Stop!” Iyosif screamed, running out the front door. He tried to jump in front of the truck but Amon was able to avoid him, swerving away from the building. Iyosif was not so easily scared. I heard two shots only moments before the window cracked before my eyes. One of his bullets had met its target, just centimeters from Amon’s face. The snow had refrozen, causing us to slip about in front of the building.

I turned to take care of Iyosif. He had his gun raised once more. I felt the fire rush around me, out from me pushing it toward him. The truck slid, causing me to miss my target but hitting a large, white tank sitting beside the building before the fire bounced up to a dry spot on the roof, igniting the building. For reasons I do not understand, Iyosif ran back inside.

Amon drove on quickly, skidding out of the yard onto the road. It was only moments before the earth shook, the night sky light up as if it were midday. The tank sitting beside the building must have been some sort of fuel.

Amon never looked back, and drove thru the forest, hands gripping the wheel. “Amon?’ I asked, ‘Do you have any idea where we are heading?” “East’ he answered, adding after a long silence, ‘toward the coast.”

I wish I had something more to say to the man sitting next to me, but words failed me. Every time I think I have him figured out, he surprises me with his willingness to another take another step for me. I still think about the day Rave’s Flat was attacked and the incredible risk he took in rescuing me. He believed the STN-J was only using plastic pellet bullets, but he did not know that for certain. Why does he risk himself so much for me? Could he care for me that much? Or maybe…no, of course not. I am his ward and nothing more. He stays with me to make certain I do not become too powerful. I am grateful for the company, the friendship. But I am sad to see how many lives are burned in the after burn of my touch.

The moon shines brightly, lighting the road before us. Amon drives with the headlights off, hoping to keep from any more attention being drawn to us. It is cold in the cab and I long for some heat, but the truck heater does not work very well. Amon saw me begin to shiver and patted the seat next to him I scoot over, thankful for the extra body heat.

I must have drifted off to sleep, feeling safe next to him. I awoke to the truck bumping up and down roughly. “We are going off the road. The truck ran out of gas” Amon told me. “Huh?” I heard myself ask. ‘Very intelligent sounding Robin’ I berated myself. “The truck ran out of fuel and I am parking it in the trees on the side of the road” he clarified. “Why?” I ask. He let the vehicle coast to a complete stop.

“The forest will give us a little camouflage from anyone searching for us.” “Oh…” “Get some sleep Robin, we will need to begin walking as soon as it becomes light” Amon said, folding his long frame up against the door. I tried to sleep as the body was willing and the flesh was weak. But the flesh being weak was part of the problem. I was so cold; I could not go back to sleep. I hated to worry him, so I said nothing, hoping to fall asleep sooner or later. I guess my shivering told him how cold I really was. He sighed, stretched and said, “Sit up Robin; I will see if there are any blankets in the back.”

He slid out of the truck cab, booted feet hitting ice frozen snow. His weight broke thru the crust, crunching sounds punctuating each step. I felt the end of the truck go down with his weight. Peeking through the back window, I could just make out a dark figure moving about in the canvas covered bed of the truck. Soon the truck bounced once more as he pumped off the bumper. “Here’ he said, flinging two wool blankets toward me, ‘we may need to move closer to conserve heat.” He tucked one blanket around me, draping the other about his shoulders before sliding back against the door. “Come here” he said, patting the spot between his legs. I could feel the heat rise in my face, suddenly wishing to freeze until morning rather than sit there. He mumbled something before dragging me over and depositing me there bodily. “Urgh!” I protested. “We can share body heat easier this way than if we sat side by side” he told me, the heat of his breath on my neck causing me to shiver. “Still cold?” he asked his concern showing. Having lost my voice, all I could do was shake my head no. I sat straight up; worried I would touch some place I should not. “Relax Robin. I can not sleep with you straining against me.” I lay back, wondering if I could ever fall asleep sitting here between his legs. I stared into the bright night for what seemed hours, finally closing my eyes just to take a rest. Only a little rest.


She is still such an innocent child. Wise beyond her years in ways, so naïve in others. I woke to find her curled up between my legs, finally having let herself trust me. Her hair, always in her face, hid her gentle smile. I could see dark circles beginning to form under her green eyes. No one should have to go thru what she has gone thru. I want to protect her from the bad things in life, knowing I only have the power to a certain point. I just hope I can do her justice. I hope she always knows she has me to protect her.

She sighed, soft and gentle, just like the rest of her demeanor before beginning to move. “Amon?” she asked, before realizing where she was and how she curled up to me in the night. A bright flush flooded her face as she scooted away from me. Inwardly, I sighed. Will she ever trust me? Had I really given her enough reason too?

“We must get moving” I remind her, anxious to find proper shelter for her. A bath for me would be nice too. She nodded her head, sliding the blanket about her shoulders before jumping into the snow after me. “Shouldn’t we cover our tracks somehow?” She does remember her training well. I walked over to an evergreen tree and quickly snapped off two branches. “Drag this over your tracks as we go.” I must have been exhausted not to have realized this little trick before Robin brought ip up. Once we were on the road, the truck tracks were deep enough to cover any tracks made by human or animal.

We walked into the rising sun, soaking up the heat like a couple of hot house flowers, toward a new day, a new hope for life.