There and Back Again

November 11, 1999

She had spent all day yesterday waiting. Waiting for Beyond to come back, when she knew he wouldn’t. Waiting for Roger or Watari to talk to her about the now missing boy. She’d even waited to see if maybe L himself would come to talk to her. She had wasted the day. No one came to her. No one seemed to care. She was starting to wonder if maybe she should have left with him. Frankly, she was furious about the whole thing. What the hell kind of place was this? Did nobody care if a student ran away? Or was it just that no one cared about Beyond? She’d had enough of waiting. She knew Watari was here today, and where Watari was, so was L. And she knew where L was. She thought she was the only student who actually knew where he holed up on the few occasions he was back in England. She once more waited, but this time she knew what she was waiting for would happen. All she needed was the sun to set.
The halls of Wammy House were always quiet at night. All the children sleeping, exhausted from a day of playing and hard study. Alta was one of the few to ever really venture out of their room at night, roaming freely and exploring hidden rooms and staircases. Beyond had joined her on a few occasions, but he hadn’t been with her the night of her big find, her second biggest secret.
The upper floors had always been off limits. They’d all been told the rooms were old, and floorboards were weak. It was a dangerous place. What they hadn’t banked on was a student like Alta, one with a craving for secret and hidden places. After exhausting the secrets of the lower levels she had ventured higher and higher into the building. And, on a cold spring night two years ago, she had found two things she’d hoped to find since beginning the program. She had first found a large bedroom. She’d spent twenty minutes in that room, excitement flowing from every pore in her body. She had a pretty good idea as to whose room it was. It was a comfortable room, with very little decoration, three computers on the floor and one on a desk. She had wanted to spend more time exploring every nook and cranny of that room, but her nerves had gotten the best of her and she’d crept quietly out. She’d hidden in the shadows, waiting for her heart to slow down. She couldn’t wait to tell B what she’d found. That was when she saw B walking toward her. She’d been very disappointed, she remembered. She had thought she’d had a secret to tell. So, she’d whispered his name as loudly as one can and have it still be considered a whisper.

“B! What are you doing up here?”

He had paused, and cocked his head to the side. And then, as soon as he spoke and her eyes had glanced above his head, she knew she’d made a mistake. A Big one.

“I believe you are mistaken, young lady.”

There were many things about that meeting she hadn’t told Beyond. She hadn’t told them that they’d spoken for quite some time. She hadn’t told him that she’d really and truly preferred L’s voice over his. She hadn’t told him, well, anything of importance. Only that she had seen him and his name. It would have been strange of her to not tell Beyond that. She also hadn’t told him that whenever she noticed Watari was back at Wammy’s, she had gone looking for L. She hadn’t told him that she had actually gotten to know him, at least as much as anyone could ever really know him.
And now, she was outside his door once more. This would not be a friendly visit. There would be no polite knocking, followed by a nice chat with tea and cake. No, she wasn’t there to visit. She was there to be angry and confrontational.

********

November 20, 2004

Light was depressed. L finally came to the conclusion that, while hysterical teenage boys were no fun, depressed teenage boys were even less so. Light did nothing but mope and sigh then sigh and mope. L had tried to feel sympathetic at first. Sure, finding out you were Kira couldn’t have been an enjoyable experience. But, surely there were limits to this sort of behavior. How long could one mope about feeling sorry for themselves? How long did one feel guilty for crimes they couldn’t even remember? L heard another sigh to his left and remembered who exactly he was thinking about. Light was quite possibly the most self-centered, narcissistic person he’d ever met. And that was saying a lot. Wammy House was full of self-centered and narcissistic people. He heard another sigh and decided he’d heard enough melodramatic sighing for the day. L stood up and made his way to the hotel room door.

“Where are you going?” L wasn’t sure, but Light sounded almost frantic.

“I’m leaving this room.”

“Why? Where?”

“Why? Why? I’m leaving because your incessant sighing is driving me out of my mind and the last thing I need is to lose my mind. As to where, I have no idea. I don’t care if I just roam the hallways so long as I don’t have to listen to you feeling sorry for yourself.”

Light stood there, mouth agape.

“Are you serious? You don’t want to listen to me feel sorry for myself? Mister, I’m-so-depressed-because-I-know-Light’s-Kira-but-can’t-prove-it-yet? Why can’t I be depressed and sad over killing tons of people, which I Can’t Even Remember Doing?”

“If I remember correctly, you decided that punching me in the face was the best therapy for my depression at that time. Should I do the same for you?”

“Pffft,” Light scoffed. “And if I remember correctly, it didn’t work! That or I just didn’t hit you hard enough!”

“Wonderful. Now you’re going to start throwing a tantrum! Bollocks, that’s what this is!”

“STOP SAYING WORDS I CAN’T UNDERSTAND! AND I’M NOT THROWING A TANTRUM!”

L needed to get the hell out of there. Light was very clearly gearing up for, if not a tantrum, then a definite fight. And L had no desire for either one at the moment. He knew Light was angry. He knew Light felt horrible. He knew Light wasn’t too happy about having to leave Japan for a very long time, possibly for the rest of his life. He knew Light was crushed that his father knew what he had been and had been horrified. But, at this moment in time, he was mentally exhausted, hungry and Watari was no where to be found. L knew this was his fault as well. The hotel didn’t have his favorite type of pastry and he’d sent Watari out to procure said pastry. He really hated this hotel right now.
Then, Watari opened the door, balancing four boxes in his arms.

“Watari! Thank God. I’ll be right back. Could you watch him?”

“I don’t need babysitting L!”

“You do too.” L turned once more to Watari. “Just lock him in the closet if he annoys you.”

L heard Light gasp behind him. Well, a gasp was a step up from a sigh at least.

“You wouldn’t dare!”

L turned around. “Try me.”

Watari, in the meantime had already meandered into the kitchen area and began brewing tea. He smiled softly at L.

“I take it you boys are having a bit of a tiff?”

L blinked once, twice. “A tiff isn’t what I’d call it. He’s gone into Mello-mode. Hell, imagine four Mello’s in Mello-mode and that could maybe come close to how he’s acting.”

“What the hell is Mello-mode!”

L chose to ignore Light, instead he made his way to the door.. Watari heard him mumble the word ‘teenagers’ under his breath before leaving. He looked from the closed door to a very shocked looking Light and he softly chuckled to himself. He had been uneasy with L’s decision at first. Who wouldn’t have been really? But, over the course of the week he’d come to terms with it. Light may have been Kira, but now he wasn’t. He was just Light Yagami, and a slightly scared Light Yagami at that. And if there was one thing Quillish Wammy knew about, it was scared and lonely children. Granted, this wasn’t exactly the sort of child he dealt with. Light was neither orphaned nor very young. But, the emotions were the same. Yes, he thought, these two were very well matched.

“Would the young mister Yagami care to have some tea with me? It will give you a chance to calm down. I can also tell you a bit about where you will be traveling.”

“Are you allowed to do that?”

“Of course I am. Now, drink some tea and I’ll tell you about England.”

********

August 15, 2001

Los Angeles. It was a bright, sprawling city, full of people and palm trees. The sun seemed to shine everyday. Everyone here seemed so hopeful and full of dreams. People waiting for their big break, waiting to be discovered.
Beyond hated it.
He hated feeling like a member of the crowd. He hated that he could feel this lonely surrounded by so many. He hated the people and the palm trees and the sun. He hated feeling insignificant. Even after making his way across an ocean and a continent, he hated that this place was where he’d had to go. He hated that he missed her.
He’d been living in a small second floor room above an abandoned storefront. It wasn’t fancy, but it was comfortable, it was enough for him. He slept on a grubby mattress he’d found in a back alley. His blanket, his pillow, everything in the room was something he’d found. It wasn’t that he didn’t have money. He’d made sure to bring plenty with him from England, and earned more since, doing odd jobs for cash under the table. But, he’d made a sort of deal with himself to not live as he had before. No more living like some special orphaned prince. No more having what ever he wanted at his beck and call. No more living like L. He would be better than L, and if he had to do it by crawling from the bottom rung of society, he would.
His plan was set. He’d already met the three people that would be the living pawns in his chess game. A chess game with L. A game L didn’t even know he was playing, was responsible for.
He’d met Believe Bridesmaid last and he’d been so excited. He’d been missing one piece. He’d thought he’d have to start over, come up with another plan. But, there he was, standing there browsing the shelves in a small comic shop that Beyond frequented. He’d almost laughed aloud in pure glee when he saw the man’s name and the numbers changing slowly above his head. The name was perfect. The dates were perfect. He had less than a year now. Less than a year to prove to the world, prove to L, that he was better.
He watched as Believe chose a book and began flipping through it.

“Ah, that one’s very good.”

Believe looked up at the strange man speaking to him.

“Excuse me? Were you talking to me?”

Beyond smiled his best shy smile.

“Yes, I’m sorry. It’s just that I’m a fan of that series.”

“Really? I was starting to think I was the only one.”

Beyond held out his hand.

“I’m Ryuzaki. It’s nice to meet a fellow fan.”

********

November 20, 2004

L had spent the last four hours on the roof of the hotel. He hadn’t planned on staying that long, but the thought of going back to the room where a still potentially huffy teenager was had kept him from leaving. For as long as he could remember, high places had been his sanctuary. As a small boy it had been trees, and as he grew more and more reclusive the trees had become rooftops. He was quite aware of the similarities between himself and a certain Parisian humpback, but he didn’t care. The only time a city was ever truly quiet was when one was high above it.
He still had doubts about his plan for Light. There was still a nagging voice in his head, screaming at him that he was harboring a mass murderer. He was allowing something evil to escape justice. But, for once in his life, his heart was louder than his head. He knew, right now, this very moment, that Kira was not downstairs waiting for him in a suite. Light Yagami, a young, egotistical and intelligent spoiled brat, was. And he was about to be whisked away from everything he’d ever known, probably forever.
L stood, listening to the sound of the wind blowing softly by his ears. There were no bells today. Maybe, he thought, just maybe, I have more time than I had been led to believe. Hell, even if he only had one more day left, it would be alright with him. Just one more day with Light. That would be enough.
He felt arms circle around his waist and a chin leaning onto his shoulder. Normally, he would have known someone was behind him. Normally, he would have thrown the person to the ground. Normally, it wasn’t someone he cared about.

“How did you find me?”

Light smiled softly.

“It was a guess, really. But, I remembered you went to the roof before. It seemed the most logical place for you.”

L moved his hand behind him to softly stroke the soft hair that was tickling his cheek.

“Is there something that you needed?”

“No, not really. Well, actually a couple of things I think I should tell you.”

“Such as?”

“Well, Watari has fallen asleep in his chair.”

“Which would explain how you were able to look for me. Anything else?”

“I. . .I’m sorry, for throwing a. . .”

“A what?”

L really knew he shouldn’t be trying to antagonize the boy. Apologizing wasn’t something that came naturally to Light. It didn’t even come naturally to himself. But, he was sure that apologies were going to be few and far between and he was going to milk this moment for all it was worth. He could practically feel the grimace on Light’s face.

“A tantrum. I’m sorry I threw a tantrum. There, happy?”

“Not really, but it will do. I too am sorry. For yelling and comparing you to Mello.”

“What is a Mello anyway?”

“It’s a who, not a what. And you’ll know soon enough I suspect.”

A comfortable silence descended between them and they both simply looked at the city below. Quiet moments too, would be few and far between. Light began grazing his lips gently over the crook of L’s neck. L decided that, while it was very pleasing, he would rather be the one doing the kissing and turned to face Light, giving his lips the full attention they deserved. L was still amazed at how tightly Light would cling to him when their lips touched. He reached for the top of Light’s shirt when he pulled away slightly.

“Don’t pull this one apart.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t think even I could come up with a good excuse as to why all my buttons have suddenly gone missing.”

“You’re no fun,” L said and instantly began carefully and slowly unbuttoning the shirt. Light was unhappy with L’s speed and began fumbling with denim, zipper and button. L smiled at his impatience and merely continued slowly divesting Light of his own pants. Light always seemed to be in a hurry now. Ripping clothes off, heated kisses L could barely taste, rushing to a climax, speed equaled passion to Light. L figured now was as good a time as any to teach his young lover a lesson.

********

A/N: Ah, I do apologize that it took me so long to get this to you. I had lemon issues, and as you can see, I gave up. Don't you just hate when you have a lovely image in your head and yet lack the words to convey it? Oh well. And, yeah, a bit of a silly moment as well. Frankly, I needed it, I don't know about you though. But, if I had any more angst at that moment, I was going to scream. So...yay for getting L to say bollocks XD. I hope you enjoyed and I'm still hard at work for the next bit. Just a warning, I will be moving soon, so there will be a HUGE block of time where I'll be unable to update, so hopefully this and the next bit will be enough. XD