The Fine Line

Niamh is AMAZINGLY SORRY that she was GONE FOR SOOOOO LONG.

Lastly, sorry that I sorta invented another character. She’s not actually in the chapter, but she’ll show up later. You’ll see… I hope you like her…

Disclaimer: I don’t own D.Gray-man. If I did… Far too many characters would be emo.

WARNING: Man-lovin’-man. If you are a homophobe or just generally dislike penises, this is not the fic for you.
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Nightmares and Confessions

Lavi looked down at his suitcase with a frown, wishing that it would either grow teeth and attack him or mysteriously develop the power to council him and his mental problems. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to go on a mission, and it wasn’t that he didn’t want to find a potential shard of Innocence – it was that he found himself looking forward to the night a certain Noah would wander into his room and attempt to rape him. After coming to the conclusion that he just wasn’t normal and it therefore did not matter if someone looped his wrists with barbed wire and strapped him to a bed, he had had other things to consider – like what his reaction would be if someone else did that.

Now he was very worried.

While packing his first layer of clothes he had envisioned Lenalee – or tried to – with a sideways grin, rope in hand, being aggressive. That didn’t work at all. He had actually laughed out loud at the mental image. Next he attempted Kanda – and suddenly felt as if he should hide behind the largest piece of furniture in the room for fear of that ever happening. Sable though he could totally imagine. The rope, twisted smile, and teasing touch – it all fit her personality like a glove, if not like a second skin. And, to top it all off, he kind of liked that idea too.

Oh thank God, He thought sarcastically, putting his last shirt in and closing the lid. I’m not completely homosexual.

With a large sigh he hefted his suitcase from the bed and turned for the door. Distantly he wondered if maybe Tyki wouldn’t even come find him this time, if maybe that was part of it – that he would never know where or when to expect him. He found that unlikely though, because the Noah always did seem to be there when you wanted them gone and…well… he honestly couldn’t say that he’d wanted them there before, so he figured the guy would show no matter what. As his feet passed over the shining hall toward the main doors he mused to himself, thinking of any number of situations that might arise and an equal number of reactions he could prepare.

In the end he knew only one thing that might make it all end. And he didn’t like it.

“Lavi,” Lenalee was blinking at him, having taken up stride when he passed her room. “You’re terribly quiet.”

He gave her a weak half smile and an attempted wink. “No, I’m just taking Yuu-chan’s advice, he says I don’t listen to silence often enough and therefore cannot appreciate it.”

“Oh…that sounds…quiet.”

He didn’t try to keep the conversation going.

I can’t kill him unless he tries to kill me. So I just have to trust him. With my life. With my Innocence. With…everything… His hand tightened around the handle of his luggage, his eyebrows did little pushups that he wasn’t aware of. Just…not…

“Gah! Mr. Angsty-angst has picked up his sparkling teammate, someone shoot me now…”

And, to make his day even better, Sable – Queen of Evil, Princess of Laziness, and now Mistress of Masochistic Fantasies – was there to see them off. He silently wondered to himself how she had accumulated so many titles.

Lenalee just greeted her as if she hadn’t heard a word. The two smiled at each other, seeming to share some kind of silent language he couldn’t understand. It did make him happy though, to see that the two had become friends even if they were like night and day. As he watched they broke into conversation as if they had been talking for hours previous, the most common words being ‘hot’, ‘man’, and ‘lover’, and honestly, Lavi found that interesting.

“Sable-chan,” He chimed enthusiastically, attempting to forget his previous thoughts. It was rather difficult when she was looking at him with one eyebrow raised, one finger scratching at the place her wounds had been across her forehead, almost as if they were not fully healed. “Erm… never mind. Just wondering what you were talking about.”

Her expression was incredulous. “You’re curious about something that has to do with man-love and fangirling? I’m actually not surprised.”

Lenalee did what she could to shush Sable, waving her hands as if she were lost as to what she was saying. “Haha… you’re funny Sable-chan… ‘fangirling’…heehee...”

Lavi chuckled at her, not needing to try and smile. “It’s alright Lenalee, I won’t tell Komui.”

She grinned as a thank you.

There was silence for a moment.

“So…” He said, his emerald eye twinkling with mischief. “Wanna tell me what you were talking about?”
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“I swear that’s the second most attractive expression you’ve ever made.” Allen mused, taking a gentle hold on the end of his hair and twirling it between his fingers.

“What’s first, Moyashi?” Kanda asked between kisses.

Allen pulled back and pierced his lips in thought. “Hmm… the day you brought me food in Sweden and you glared like I was the bane of your existence. And then I kissed you. It’s a tie between the look you gave me when you walked in and the look you gave me after I did that.”

Kanda gave a little sound of amusement, laying soft kisses on Allen’s neck; his finger’s pulling at the shirt he had given him only moments before. “Che… did you… want to talk about it now, Moyashi?” His right hand curved around Allen’s neck and he leaned in to lay another kiss on his lips, aware that if they went much farther it would be him rendered incapable of listening.

“About what?”

“Your nightmare, baka.”

The younger boy looked up at Kanda for a moment, remembering the horror of his dream. He found it odd that he was not at all worried about his own death – Kanda would never kill him, that was obvious – but the part about suicide was horrifying. Would the Japanese man go so far if something happened to him? He hoped not. Allen wanted Kanda to have a long, healthy, happy life, with lots of soba and tempura and love, even if he wasn’t a part of it. Not being there wasn’t a worry.

“You want to hear it first?” He asked, tugging lightly on his lover’s hair. “Or can I touch you?”

“You’re mind won’t be on me if you don’t tell me, will it Moyashi?”

“Yeah… I guess that’s kind of unfair…” The Japanese man’s teeth bit sharply at his collar bone, making him yip. Allen poked him on the nose, a scolding frown drawing his eyebrows together in a mock scowl. “Bad kitty.”

Kanda glared deeply. Allen blushed.

“Spill.” He insisted, rolling away and reclining on the headboard. The silver haired boy was left bereft; his hands no longer within reach of Kanda’s still clothed shoulders, his fine ebony hair. It was the same as it had been in the dream – just the same – and the reality of it made him wince.

With a great sigh Allen pulled himself closer, reclined his head on his lover’s shoulder as he spoke. “I was standing on this snow covered hill, looking for you. I fell and couldn’t catch myself. I don’t think my arms worked properly. It was cold. I kept wondering where you were and then I saw you and…” It was hard to say it but he didn’t know why. Thinking about it was like being there, feeling the cold blood on his face, in his hair, the sear of icy metal thrust through him. And it had been Kanda, making good on all manners of death threats. But then…

“Che, and I grew so impatient I ripped off your clothes and—”

“No! Nothing like that!”

“Then what?”

The British boy was very quiet for a moment while he thought about it, building up courage that kept him from burst into tears again. It had been so real… “You took me by the shirt and held me away from you. And…you…” Why was it so hard? Why did it make him so frightened? “You killed me.”

Kanda blinked at Allen’s averted eyes for a moment, trying to comprehend.

“You dropped me in the snow, and you were crying. I tried to stop you but… you…turned Mugen on yourself too. And I couldn’t breathe to say not to. I was so scared. I didn’t see if you died but…I just know that you did. There was nothing I could do to stop it.” His right hand closed like a vice on Kanda’s jacket yet he did not seem to be aware of his bloodless knuckles. “It was so real…”

Kanda hugged him closer, glad that it hadn’t been a dream he had had. His two worst fears embodied – and suicide to top it all off. He was more likely to eat pure sugar than he was to do something like that. Hell, he’d eat sugar, wear a pink dress, and give Allen flowers before he offed himself. And he didn’t even want to think about murdering Allen. There was nothing more frightening than losing him. Not even the end of the world.

“I want you to listen to me, Moyashi-kun.” He said softly, pulling Allen’s head to his chest and wrapping his arms around his back. He felt the heave of a silent, suppressed sob but pretended not to feel it. “No power on Earth would make me hurt you. Not Noah, not Exorcist, no power in Hell or Heaven. And as for myself…” He leaned his chin on Allen’s head; his hands ran up and down the boy’s back reassuringly. “I have too many things to live for.”

“Two?”

“Yes.”

“Like what? Sex and destruction?”

“Che, love and revenge.”

“Revenge?” He looked up at Kanda and his cat ears, amazed at the level of calm in his voice and expression.

“You shouldn’t be interested in that right now.” He lifted a delicate black eyebrow, but Allen didn’t understand.

“What should I be interested in?”

The mattress creaked when Kanda slid down the headboard, the smaller boy falling easily onto him.

“Oh…”
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“Oh my goodness! That’s – so – hot!”

“Seriously? I thought it was kind of cheesy…”

“I just can’t believe that you were interested in this sort of thing and never told me! We’ve known each other so long!”

“Well… I only realized recently.”

“Heh. Mr. Angsty-angst discovers that he’s Ms. Angsty-angst. I’m going to start calling you Lala-chan!”

“Aw…what a cute nickname.”

“No it isn’t. I don’t get nicknames, I give them. Besides, who said anything about me being female?”

“It’s obvious isn’t it?”

“I’d say so…”

“If anything were obvious I would have observed it by now, so what am I missing?”

The two girls looked at each other sidelong, winked opposing eyes. “Uke!”

“Oh like Hell!”

“Don’t worry Lala-chan,” Sable gave his shoulder a little pat, bobbing her head as if in approval. “It only hurts the first few times. Even less if you use good, water-based—”

“I know! It’s not like I haven’t read about it. Now stop treating me like I’m your pet gay man, I happen to be attracted to a woman too.” He crossed his arms, casting the book aside with a scoff. Why had he chosen to spend the last half an hour in the tower with these two? They were sexuality sucking leeches, fangirls, snakes to purity – and perfectly alright with it when he said he thought one man kissing another man was something he wanted to look at.

“A woman, eh?” Sable tapped her lip at him, uncrossing her legs as she leaned forward on the bed. The three of them had gone to her room when Lavi made his half-confession, being it was the most brimming with material to test on him. She kept the place odd looking, but it wasn’t completely unlikable. One might have thought her personality would demand dark colors, and a black rug, red bedding and curtains marked with skulls or chains, but that wasn’t how she chose to decorate. Instead the curtains were a soft peach, covered with pink roses and bordered by heavy lace; she had no rug, but instead kept two chairs by her astoundingly large bookcase and a small tan mat in front of her closet, the black doors of which remained closed. Her bedspread matched the curtains down to the kind of roses on them, and her oak headboard contained both more books and few childish trinkets, a crystal unicorn among them.

But she did have a four-poster.

“Yes, what’s wrong with it?” He demanded.

“You said, a woman. That means you like one, Lavi, not all of them in general.” Lenalee observed. “I think Sable wants to know who you have in mind.” She leaned forward in her chair ever so slightly, attempting to look innocent. “And I honestly wouldn’t mind knowing either.”

“Heh… Er-ah-he-sh-ya-nerma-durpa-doo…” His mind did not quite understand what was being asked of it because he refused to let it, so when his mouth attempted to spit out the answer, chaos fell out instead. One thing he could not say was that she was sitting in front of him, looking interested, but he couldn’t tell them no one because then they’d never believe him. And once again, He thought, letting his head sag as if he were embarrassed. I’m fucked.

“Lavi?”

“You look a little green around the gills…”

“Oh! Look at the time! We’re going to be late Lenalee!” He chimed as soon as the idea had come to his head. “We best be off!” He took her by the hand and stood up, dragging her away from Sable nearly too fast for her to grab her suitcase. “Don’t wanna miss our train!” He kept right on yanking even when she protested, Sable just sat in half stunned silence, chewing her lip. He prayed that his thoughts were still has hidden as ever, because he didn’t want her knowing them.

“Have fun... you two…” She just waved.

When Lavi had closed Sable’s door and they were a goodly distance down the hall, he unhanded Lenalee. She demanded answers immediately, but he wasn’t forthcoming – he was once again losing himself in his thoughts. But it wasn’t his most recent disaster that plagued his mind; it was a question that brought a ponderous frown to his lips.

He did like Sable. But did he like her because she was like Tyki? Didn’t that make him even more broken than before?

“I’m sorry Lenalee,” He said at last, cutting her off short. “I… just… I’m sorry for my silence.”
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Allen kissed Kanda deeply, even though his throat hurt from holding back the tears. Kanda’s hands ran slowly up and down his back, not in a hurried manner and not in a demanding way, just in a way that made him feel very trusted, very safe, as if his lover did not want anything from him but just to be. When he pulled back he looked at Kanda’s face, holding himself up on his hands.

“I cannot believe you actually want to make love after what I just told you.” He smiled though, even though his words were somewhat severe.

“Che,” Kanda narrowed his sapphire eyes and lifted his lips in a half-smile, giving a gleam of teeth. “I could make love to you anytime, anywhere, under any circumstances so long as you were willing. I could do you if my mother was in the same room.”

“Kanda! That’s horrible!”

“What? Honestly. She would most likely have a small heart attack though.” The thought brought a small smile to his face as he imagined her, hard woman that she was, learning of her son’s soft spot for Allen Baka-Moyashi Walker. He could see her, five feet tall, black hair hanging down around her scowling face, katana at her belt, unwrinkled face flushed from surprise and amazement. And hearing that Allen was British would most likely get him hit over the head with the bunt side of her sword as well. “Or beat me.”

“Why do you smile when you say that?” Allen asked as he played with the collar of his lover’s jacket, gently tugging at it in order to slide it off his shoulder.

Kanda’s hands were still rubbing at his back when he spoke, but he shrugged his left arm out when the boy prompted him to. “She shows her love with violence. Her last words to me before I left were ‘don’t get killed and don’t bring anyone home with you,’ and she kicked me in the back, but that doesn’t really do what she said justice.” As he spoke Allen started on his other shoulder, listening as he worked. “The word she used for you is closer to your word for bastard, and the word for home was more like house. And there was cursing.”

“Don’t you die or bring anyone back to the house, bastard?”

“Something like that. Maybe… ‘Don’t do anything too stupid and die, and don’t bring any dumb idiots back with you, bastard.’”

“She sounds lovely.”

“Oh, you’ll be the best of friends.”

“What?”

Kanda laughed. “Eventually, many, many, long years down the line, when you maybe eventually accidentally bump into each other in the street – I think you’ll like each other.”

“Love.”

“Hm?”

“Do you want me to meet your family?”

How did Allen always do that? Steal his thoughts even at the most intimate of moments and act as though Kanda had said exactly what he meant to say and not something sarcastically different. He thought about it for a moment. It seemed like a good idea, and Allen seemed like he would be one to want to do such a thing. And it wasn’t as if his mother wouldn’t get over it eventually. “Che, might be nice.”

“You know what I want, Love?” Allen’s voice was dangerously low as he laid his lips on Kanda’s chest, kissing slowly downward until he reached the farthest point he could without scooting down.

“You want me to shut up and touch you.”

Allen’s assent was nothing but a questing hand pushed beneath the line of his belt. “Might be… nice…” He whispered between kisses. The Japanese man smiled at him and let his hands quest more vigorously, following the lines of Allen’s body until he received a gentle sigh of appreciation, and felt warm hands spread across his still damp chest as his lover moved higher on his body, straddling his hips. “Very nice.”

Kanda was amazed at the speed he could undo the button’s of Allen’s shirt. Mentally he noted that it must have been all of the practice he was getting, always taking the shirt off of his lover.

It took all of Allen’s will not to rush things, but he chose not to. Last time, on Christmas, he had learned that Kanda was a patient person, so he would do what he could to respect that patience. It meant he could spend more time running his hands over his skin, gliding them through his wet hair, and his lips could find places they had never discovered were remotely sensitive. Like when he brushed lightly across his lover’s ear – the shiver and goosebumps that spread down his neck and arm were a new form of entertainment.

Meanwhile, Kanda pushed Allen’s shirt down his shoulders. This was a new angle for him, but it wasn’t too difficult to get used to. He knew that sitting there the British boy would be able to feel when his passion was highest even through his tight pants, and he would be able to feel him there, pressing back. That alone encouraged him to lift his hips ever so slightly when a warm and searching mouth found the alerted surface of his left nipple.

Allen smiled at the short sound his lover made, a sudden ironic thought passing through his mind. Kanda had put on the cat ears in order to seduce him – but he was now sitting up on top of him, hands caressing, leading them on into further acts, having control. He wondered vaguely if Kanda even realized that he had actually managed to seduce himself.

None of that mattered anymore when Kanda took him around the shoulders and pulled him down into a long kiss. His lips parted but his tongue played lightly back when Allen found entrance, and the two did not separate for more than an instant before Allen kissed him back again, relishing in the sensation. It was easy for the smaller boy to lose himself in that touch, for more than one reason. He wanted it, yes, but it wasn’t as if he would want it from just anyone. He wanted Kanda to kiss him, and only Kanda, because he really did love him.

“Love,” He husked when they at last broke for more than an instant. His lover’s fingers drifted to the fastener of his pants but did not open them, just ran slowly up and down the place of entry, drawing a slight gasp to his throat. Words were meaningless with that pressure there, promising ecstasy. So instead of words he rocked forward, placing a margin of his weight into the motion and eliciting a low moan from his lover. The hand against him stopped in that instant, stalled by the pleasure. “Do… you think…the pants…should—” The hand against him pulled a button open before going back to caressing. He bit his lip instinctually but the growl in his throat still escaped him. His hips gave an involuntary jerk that cause Kanda’s voice to join his.

“Yes.” The word was less than vocalized, more than whispered. At that prompting he let his fingers glide down Kanda’s chest until he came to the top of his belt, which he proceeded to unbuckle as slowly as his will would let him, sliding it from the loops before he started on the buttons of his lover’s pants. When those too were cast aside he rolled off of Kanda for the sake of discarding his own garment, but he rolled back again, as soon as they were gone. It was then that Kanda’s true patience took hold.

“Hold it, Moyashi.” He breathed when Allen was perched atop him once more, right hand going for his outer thigh. He stopped short, surprised by the sudden interference in his plans.

“Yes?” He was almost gasping.

“Let me see you for a moment.” The Japanese man ran delicate lines over his shoulder; his left had looping back to the base of his spine. Allen watched his dark eyes travel the curves of him the sweeps and lines, pausing in the oddest of places – the turn of a knee or the shadow of a small and yet well defined muscle – then passing over his neck until their eyes met each other again. “I don’t tell you often enough that you are beautiful.”

Allen blushed despite his urge to ravage. “Says the girly man…”

“Che,” Kanda reached up and took him by the shoulders, pulling down with a sigh. “Shall I remind you how womanly I am not?”

The British boy smiled, rolled his pelvis against Kanda’s, a motion that made his lover clench tightly to his skin, the air caught in his lungs. “That won’t… be necessary, Love.” He flicked the other man’s nose with a free finger. “The ears will render me incapable of remembering any lesson you try to teach me today.”

Kanda winced and chuckled, having forgotten that he was wearing them. Regardless of that though, he made up his mind and pounced.
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“Silence? Why are you being silent?” Lenalee asked as the boarded the train. “I don’t understand, Lavi! And I won’t unless you tell me what’s going on.”

The redhead plopped himself down in his seat, putting his suitcase beside him, trying to come up with some half believable lie before the girl attacked him or ripped out all of her hair in worry. He almost cried when he realized that nothing short of the truth would satisfy her. He didn’t want to tell the truth. Not to anyone. Ever. But he would if it meant someone would be happier because of it.

“I can tell by how you’re acting that it’s not just the fact that you like a girl,” Lenalee said flatly, confirming that she was indeed more observant than she let on. “There’s something else too. You’ve been very reserved for this last six days – maybe even longer for all I know – and I just can’t tell what’s bothering you. Why won’t you tell me the important part? Why won’t you tell someone? Please Lavi, I’m your friend. I don’t need to know who you like but I’d like to know what’s been chewing you up inside. I’m here to talk to about whatever is bothering you.” Her eyes were intense, her hand scampered across the fabric of her skirt as if it wanted to touch him, but she didn’t do it. “Please.”

He licked his lips, thinking. What was he supposed do? He couldn’t lie to her. She was his second closest friend, falling behind Yuu by about half the secrets he knew. She would still be able to catch a lie though, unless he tried to go all Bookman and tell her with an honest face. He was bad at that though, very bad. She’d see through that too because she’d seen him in truth telling mode too often.

He would have to tell her, even if he hadn’t told Yuu.

But he wouldn’t tell her everything.

“It’s… not what you think.” He said, leaning back into his red upholstered seat. She relaxed a bit, seeming to know that he wanted to go on. “There’s something wrong with me. I know there is. I…” The words came out so easy that he had to wonder why he wanted to keep them in. “On my last mission I had an unfortunate turn of luck that no one knows about. It was no big deal, nothing I can’t handle with a little thought, but it taught me something about myself that scares me that isn’t supposed to be true.”

“What?” She prompted gently; her voice lacked any serious curiosity.

How does one make that sound nicer? He thought for a moment. “I…for one don’t care if a person is male or female.”

She smiled, giving a light laugh. “Honestly, I don’t think most people do.”

He smiled back for that note of encouragement. “And secondly…” He swallowed hard, aware that his heart was pounding at just the thought of it. “I enjoy… being unable to interfere. I hate it with a burning passion, but at the same time… I liked it.”

I hope she doesn’t notice that I said that in the past tense.

Her smile did not fade and her eyes did not blaze with the conclusion that he had come to. “Is that why Sable gave you that rope for Christmas?”

He deftly nodded.

She laughed again, covering her mouth with her fingers as she giggled. This was not the reaction he had been expecting. He didn’t see the humor. Sure, he had left out the part about Tyki, and the fact that it had actually happened, and a lot of other stuff, but it did not deserve a giggle fit in answer. “Sorry,” She gave one last bubble before settling for a wide grin. “You had me so worried, and really it’s nothing at all.”

“What?”

“It’s alright to like rope or feathers or cat ears or men or girls or frustration. It doesn’t make you anything that you weren’t two weeks ago. So long as you accept it, everyone else who likes you will.”

“But it’s not normal.”

“It’s your normal.”

“I’m not sure if I should take that as an insult or a compliment.”

She tilted her head, still grinning. “Neither.”
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Patience is only a virtue until someone else has more than you. Allen thought as he met Kanda’s kisses vigorously, acutely aware of the hand traveling lower and lower on his spine. After that, it’s nothing but clothes.

They were both attempting to run things at least a little, Kanda by coaxing Allen into frenzy, Allen by trying to outlast his patience. In the end neither succeeded in his goal – they both gave in at the same instant. The smaller of the two did so by leaning ever so slightly to capture the nearly three-fourths gone bottle of massage oil that they kept on the nightstand, while his larger lover wrapped his legs around him to pull him close. The British boy let out a small giggle when their chests collided, sending his left hand just a tiny bit too far and knocking the oil to the floor. He couldn’t rescue it with Kanda holding on to him like that, but he couldn’t do anything with Kanda without it. He stretched as far as he could without activating his arm, ignoring the lips on his throat, the hands that had given up on his spine entirely. A slight pain, beginning in his wrist and traveling his whole arm alerted him that whatever had been making it twitch earlier wasn’t entirely gone, but he ignored it for more pressing matters.

The bottle was at last captured.

When the Japanese man saw the innocent bottle he felt himself grin – he hadn’t totally lost the war just had something of a draw. It amazed him. Allen really could keep up with him if he knew there was something to keep up with, and Kanda found himself perhaps more eager than he had known himself to be. The two were rubbing off on each other, he thought as he watched his lover uncork the bottle with his teeth out of mild frustration. He was still unable to imagine him holding a katana, or wearing a kimono, or even saying more than ‘please be kind to me’ in Kanda’s native tongue – but it was a start.

The warmth of a finger against him brought him back to the moment, and he moaned into Allen’s lips as it slid gently within. His lover responded in kind, pressing deeper, his free hand curving around Kanda’s hip as he leaned into the kiss. With most of his weight on his knees Allen pitched forward slightly; Kanda tensed beneath him, his back arching away from the mattress like a bow at the touch. It was enough. It was either now or never.

Kanda let his hands move upward, fingertips dancing over ribs that expanded as Allen replaced his fingers with his length. He had learned by now that the presence within him was not something to be rejected or feared, so their love making was much smoother than it had been in the past. Allen was amazed by it; Kanda had so much self control he could will himself to the point of shared rapture, his muscles tight but not pressing, his eyes close to the pleasure that poured through him. All the while Allen lost himself to the torrent. The legs that hooked around the back of his pulled him as close as they could, helping with the first thrust, but after that he was on his own, gone astray as he watched the bliss on his lover’s face, felt the same ripple through him like a wave.

He heard himself moan into Kanda’s collar bone, felt the fingers on his shoulders curl as his hand at last found his lover’s erection. He rubbed in time with his thrusts – which was difficult with Kanda arching into him at every wave, head pushed back in the pillows. The sight of Kanda’s release sent him plummeting over the edge. His world shrank to nothing but the two of them, here, in this moment, and not in the cold, dark world outside. There was nothing but them.

Kanda sighed deeply as Allen fell to the bed beside him, rolling on to his back, his expression warm. He turned slowly so that he faced him entirely and could reach over and trace gently shapes on Allen’s pale skin. He could still find the place that he had cut his skin with Mugen, though it was hardly more than a whiter place on the boy’s skin. His fingers followed it unthinkingly, down to Allen’s hip and up again, gently.

“You’re very touchy-feely today, Love,” The object of his affections said with a yawn.

“Che, is that so bad?”

Allen smiled sideways at him. “Nope, just means we have to shower more.”

Kanda laughed.

He never used to laugh, Allen thought, twirling a bit of his lover’s hair through his fingers. Or smile. Or grin. Or anything. Did I… do that?

“Well then… whoever’s cleaner should go get the water warm. And I should lie here waiting.”

“What?!” Allen we incredulous. “Who decided I was cleaner?”

Kanda che’d and shrugged, his hand stopped its trek down memory lane. “I did.”

“Have you not noticed that I have your love-juice all over my stomach?”

“Love-juice? What a horrible name. Is that why you’re sticky? Oh… I couldn’t imagine where that had gone…”

“Kanda, are you…being sarcastic? That’s… kind of scary.”

The Japanese man scowled. “Baka, just go get the shower ready before I kill you.”

Allen smiled. “Aw, good…you are the same beautiful man I fell in love with…”
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Thanks for reading! And for waiting :) And for getting through my GIANT chapters of DOOM.