The Calm
folder
+. to F › Cowboy Bebop
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
49
Views:
2,515
Reviews:
34
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
+. to F › Cowboy Bebop
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
49
Views:
2,515
Reviews:
34
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Cowboy Bebop, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Pride
Disclaimer: sorry, I wish I did, but Bebop ain't mine
******
Artist: Spineshank
Song: If It Breathes
******
The Calm
Chapter 34: Pride
* If it breathes -- Choke it*
Amaya lay prone on the floor, blood pooling about her crumpled form. The mocking sounds of Julia and her goons laughing echoed through her mind. She wanted to kick herself, if she could move her legs she could. She had screamed. For the first time since her placement in the room, she had screamed. She had cried out for help, even pleaded for them to stop.
* How do I smile this way?
I shed the light but still I rely on
The fear that starts my day
I wonder, I wonder*
Her body was broken and now, so was her pride. She had lost that which she had most cherished in all her incarnations: her indomitable pride. She could feel the hot sting of tears as they escaped her eyes and seeped into the blindfold about her head. She didn’t care anymore; she just wanted it to end, for the pain and the humiliation to end. Either through death or through the slim chance of escape, or the even slimmer chance of rescue, it needed to stop. She still clung to that fragile hope, that those that she loved would come to her rescue. But as she lay in her cooling blood and tears, she could feel it being to slip away as well.
* What has to happen to make you see?
If nothing happens would you feel?
(I've got to take it)*
How many times had she escaped death? How many times had she stared into the bleak abyss of eternity during a fight or after, only to be pulled back by sheer will and the help of outside forces? How many times had she felt the blissful peace of death, only to be awakened into the pain of living? Too many times. Perhaps, this was it, this was her end. Not in battle, not in heroic and dramatic sacrifice to save those she loved, not even in her sleep. Perhaps, broken and lying in her own cooling blood, this was it. As a tortured, mutilated, and weak creature, crying for deaths sweet release.
* If it breathes -- Choke it*
Amaya choked out a hoarse laugh. What a fitting end to her life. The feared assassin, the chosen of the Van and Mao, and the ruthless killer, dying in a pool of her own blood, chained and helpless with spirit and body broken. Oh, a fitting end indeed.
* I've stolen this abuse
All I have left is just these scars*
What would Mao think of thWhatWhat would he say to her now? She could feel her tight, blood stained, lips twitch into a grim smile. She would know soon en. As. As soon as Julia decided to kill her, or she bled to death, she would join him in hell.
* What has to happen to make you see?
If nothing happens would you feel?
(I've got to take it)*
What would Sith say to her giving up? Would she be disappointed? Maybe even disgusted that she died so weakly? She choked ano another laugh. Sith would be angry, that’s for sure. Julia was in for a world of pain once Sith got her deadly hands on her, once her feral self got its mad claws on her.
* You grow*
What would Vicious and Spike say? Would they spout memories of happy and sad times? Would they be furious? Would they be destroyed? She didn’t think the latter would happen. They had accepted her death once, perhaps this time would be better for them. They had chosen their mates, even had children with them. They had left her behind. She smiled softly at that thought. They deserved happiness, so much more than she did. It had been her fault that they had fallen out in the first place. Her fault.
*Scars*
Had she never been taken in by Mao, would things have turned out the way they did? Maybe. She then stiffened. Now thinking on it, Julia would have gotten in anyways, Vicious would have still gone crazy and, in the end, they’d both be dead. She felt tears come again at that thought. No, if this was the end, she’d have no regrets. If she had a chance, she would haven’t changed a thing.
* What has to happen to make you see?
If nothing happens would you feel?
(I've got to take it)*
No regrets. No tears. No more. She would stop wallowing in her past mistakes, she would stop feeling sorry for herself. She winced as she made herself sit up. If Death was coming, she was going to face it head on, just like she had so many times before. Julia thought she had broken her pride, even had her convinced for a moment there. But Julia forgot one thing, Amaya was no puppet, not one to be manipulated. She was the master manipulator. She felt refreshed, her pain forgotten momentarily. She could feel the dragon that had once been rise again.
*You grow*
~*~*~*~
*****
Artist: Spineshank
Song: Mend
*****
~*~*~*~
* Forgive me for all you've done*
Eve smiled knowingly as she stalked the halls towards Mao’s office. Another successful mission completed. She ignored the secretary, sending her an arrogant glare as she strode through the doors. She wasn’t dressed ‘corprate’ enough for the damn secretary, and had, since she turned seventeen, been lectured regularly by the bitch on ‘office dresscode’.
* If I led your eyes to see
If I fed your mind with sickened thoughts*
She was currently garbed in her favorite scarlet halter top that revealed the scars that dotted her arms and the crimson colored dragon on her back. Her hair was upswept and secured with silver hairsticks that could be used as knives if necessary. Sometimes she wanted to stab that bitch behind the desk with them, but, for Mao’s sake, didn’t. Her stiletto heeled boots clicked against the polished tile on the floor as she strode through one of the rooms of Mao’s office, her black leather encased, legs moving fluidly on such dangerous shoes. She appeared sex, personified. As was her intention, for the planned trip with Spike and Vicious to her club, Ookami Ryu, before a night of furious and challenging, group sex.
* Would you consciously conceive
Everything that I have offered you?*
Mao was staring out his window, seemingly in deep thought. Only Eve knew that he was just putting off his meeting with the new chick, Julia, as she complained about Sith’s mental status again. Honestly, she didn’t know why Vicious kept the whiny bitch, but she supposed that she would make a satisfactory bedmate, not that she would bed her. Julia ‘frowned down upon’ bisexual experiences. Eve chuckled at that thought. If only she knew about what Vicious and Spike did together.
* Shame
Stronger than*
Eve grinned cattily as she tok a seat on the edge of Mao’s desk. “Thinking dirty thoughts?” she teased.
Mao glared at the young woman. “I take it you are going out later tonight?” he asked back.
Eve seemed shocked. “Why would you say that? Here I am, taking the tio dro dress up for you, and you suspect me of planning to play?”
*Pride
Stronger than*
Mao raised an eyebrow. “Out with Spike and Vicious again?”
Eve pouted. “You can see through that way too easily.”
“You make it easy. You’re almost too convincing in your lies, my dear, sta stated.
Eve shrugged. “I learned from the best.”
Mao ignored her comment and turned his chair to face the doorway. “I take it the mission went well?”
“Yup, even though I was all on my lonesome. What’s with Julia trying to get Sith committed? She trying to get killed?”
Mao sighed heavily at the mention of Julia. “Most likely. Sometimes, I wish our Sith would just kill her and be done with it.”
* Hate
Stronger than*
Eve seemed shocked. “Mao!”
“Did you write up your report?” he asked, changing the subject.
Eve nodded. “Yeah. On that bitch’s desk as we speak,” Eve grumbled.
“Mrs. Nameki probably wouldn’t appreciate that, Eve.”
Eve shrugged. “Like I care what that dried up old hag thinks. She bothers me.”
Mao shook his head. “Eve, remember that you are no goddess. You cannot control life or death, just because you deal out the latter. You must be careful, the knowledge you carry, the lives of those in your group, are far more precious than petty feelings of pride.”
*Life*
Eve nodded before kissing her only father figure on the cheek and escaping out the door. “Enjoy your meeting with Julia, Mao!” she bid as she trotted off.
~*~*~*~
*If I lied to you would you still believe?
Mend your soul from my little fucking game*
Eve smiled softly at the two, exhausted and sleeping males on either side of her upright form. The black cigarette in her fingers seemed the only light in the room, save the pale moonlight. Gently, she touched each of the men, caressing each facial feature, dragging her fingers through their tangled hair with her pale fingers.
*Forgive me for all you've done*
She could hear the faint sounds of club downstairs being closed up for the day. The place had been packed, as it usually was, raking in a new tidal wave of money her way. Silently, she pondered Mao’s words.
‘You cannot control life or death, just because you deal out the latter. You must be careful, the knowledge you carry, the lives of those in your group, are far more precious than petty feelings of pride…’
She didn’t understand him. Sure she was careful with the knowledge she held on each of them. She protected it like a most precious gem. She would never let anyone, even those the information pertained to, have it. But pride? Why would he lecture her on pride? Was it not her pride that kept her alive? That made her horde that precious information from syndicate anuntyunty hunter alike?
*Have I made your life a mess?
Is your soul perverted just like mine?
Inconvenienced by distress
Let it go, there's nowhere left to hide*
She wondered many things. Why Julia insisted that Sith be committed? Why she thought that she was so sneaky, that she had passed beneath Eve’s radar, when she was well aware of Julia’s plans, only didn’t care. Julia would try to tear them apart. She would attempt to break the bonds of Vicious and Spike, but in the end, she would lose. Julia was an idiot, and Eve knew that. It was her pride that told her so. So, why did Mao think it was bad?
* Shame
Stronger than
Pride
Stronger than
Hate
Stronger than
Life*
Eve felt a tug on either side of her waist. Spike and Vicious were being attacked by their nightmares again. Their memories of a time long past, but still traumatic. She sighed and extinguished her burnt down cigarette. She then snuggled down and let them curl into her arms. She felt loved at these moments. She wouldn’t give up these moments for anything. She wouldn’t give them up. Niether the boys, nor Sith. They were hers, and if she had any say, would remain so until her death.
*If I lied to you would you still believe?
Mend your soul from my little fucking game*
Julia was a fool if she thought she could take her favorite toys away. If that blonde bimbo thought she could destroy all she, Eve, had built. She was the master manipulator, and one of the most feared assassins out there, next to Sith. If Julia thought she could destroy her, she was sadly mistaken.
* Stronger than life*
No one took what was hers.
~*~*~*~
******
Artist: Spineshank
Song: If It Breathes
******
The Calm
Chapter 34: Pride
* If it breathes -- Choke it*
Amaya lay prone on the floor, blood pooling about her crumpled form. The mocking sounds of Julia and her goons laughing echoed through her mind. She wanted to kick herself, if she could move her legs she could. She had screamed. For the first time since her placement in the room, she had screamed. She had cried out for help, even pleaded for them to stop.
* How do I smile this way?
I shed the light but still I rely on
The fear that starts my day
I wonder, I wonder*
Her body was broken and now, so was her pride. She had lost that which she had most cherished in all her incarnations: her indomitable pride. She could feel the hot sting of tears as they escaped her eyes and seeped into the blindfold about her head. She didn’t care anymore; she just wanted it to end, for the pain and the humiliation to end. Either through death or through the slim chance of escape, or the even slimmer chance of rescue, it needed to stop. She still clung to that fragile hope, that those that she loved would come to her rescue. But as she lay in her cooling blood and tears, she could feel it being to slip away as well.
* What has to happen to make you see?
If nothing happens would you feel?
(I've got to take it)*
How many times had she escaped death? How many times had she stared into the bleak abyss of eternity during a fight or after, only to be pulled back by sheer will and the help of outside forces? How many times had she felt the blissful peace of death, only to be awakened into the pain of living? Too many times. Perhaps, this was it, this was her end. Not in battle, not in heroic and dramatic sacrifice to save those she loved, not even in her sleep. Perhaps, broken and lying in her own cooling blood, this was it. As a tortured, mutilated, and weak creature, crying for deaths sweet release.
* If it breathes -- Choke it*
Amaya choked out a hoarse laugh. What a fitting end to her life. The feared assassin, the chosen of the Van and Mao, and the ruthless killer, dying in a pool of her own blood, chained and helpless with spirit and body broken. Oh, a fitting end indeed.
* I've stolen this abuse
All I have left is just these scars*
What would Mao think of thWhatWhat would he say to her now? She could feel her tight, blood stained, lips twitch into a grim smile. She would know soon en. As. As soon as Julia decided to kill her, or she bled to death, she would join him in hell.
* What has to happen to make you see?
If nothing happens would you feel?
(I've got to take it)*
What would Sith say to her giving up? Would she be disappointed? Maybe even disgusted that she died so weakly? She choked ano another laugh. Sith would be angry, that’s for sure. Julia was in for a world of pain once Sith got her deadly hands on her, once her feral self got its mad claws on her.
* You grow*
What would Vicious and Spike say? Would they spout memories of happy and sad times? Would they be furious? Would they be destroyed? She didn’t think the latter would happen. They had accepted her death once, perhaps this time would be better for them. They had chosen their mates, even had children with them. They had left her behind. She smiled softly at that thought. They deserved happiness, so much more than she did. It had been her fault that they had fallen out in the first place. Her fault.
*Scars*
Had she never been taken in by Mao, would things have turned out the way they did? Maybe. She then stiffened. Now thinking on it, Julia would have gotten in anyways, Vicious would have still gone crazy and, in the end, they’d both be dead. She felt tears come again at that thought. No, if this was the end, she’d have no regrets. If she had a chance, she would haven’t changed a thing.
* What has to happen to make you see?
If nothing happens would you feel?
(I've got to take it)*
No regrets. No tears. No more. She would stop wallowing in her past mistakes, she would stop feeling sorry for herself. She winced as she made herself sit up. If Death was coming, she was going to face it head on, just like she had so many times before. Julia thought she had broken her pride, even had her convinced for a moment there. But Julia forgot one thing, Amaya was no puppet, not one to be manipulated. She was the master manipulator. She felt refreshed, her pain forgotten momentarily. She could feel the dragon that had once been rise again.
*You grow*
~*~*~*~
*****
Artist: Spineshank
Song: Mend
*****
~*~*~*~
* Forgive me for all you've done*
Eve smiled knowingly as she stalked the halls towards Mao’s office. Another successful mission completed. She ignored the secretary, sending her an arrogant glare as she strode through the doors. She wasn’t dressed ‘corprate’ enough for the damn secretary, and had, since she turned seventeen, been lectured regularly by the bitch on ‘office dresscode’.
* If I led your eyes to see
If I fed your mind with sickened thoughts*
She was currently garbed in her favorite scarlet halter top that revealed the scars that dotted her arms and the crimson colored dragon on her back. Her hair was upswept and secured with silver hairsticks that could be used as knives if necessary. Sometimes she wanted to stab that bitch behind the desk with them, but, for Mao’s sake, didn’t. Her stiletto heeled boots clicked against the polished tile on the floor as she strode through one of the rooms of Mao’s office, her black leather encased, legs moving fluidly on such dangerous shoes. She appeared sex, personified. As was her intention, for the planned trip with Spike and Vicious to her club, Ookami Ryu, before a night of furious and challenging, group sex.
* Would you consciously conceive
Everything that I have offered you?*
Mao was staring out his window, seemingly in deep thought. Only Eve knew that he was just putting off his meeting with the new chick, Julia, as she complained about Sith’s mental status again. Honestly, she didn’t know why Vicious kept the whiny bitch, but she supposed that she would make a satisfactory bedmate, not that she would bed her. Julia ‘frowned down upon’ bisexual experiences. Eve chuckled at that thought. If only she knew about what Vicious and Spike did together.
* Shame
Stronger than*
Eve grinned cattily as she tok a seat on the edge of Mao’s desk. “Thinking dirty thoughts?” she teased.
Mao glared at the young woman. “I take it you are going out later tonight?” he asked back.
Eve seemed shocked. “Why would you say that? Here I am, taking the tio dro dress up for you, and you suspect me of planning to play?”
*Pride
Stronger than*
Mao raised an eyebrow. “Out with Spike and Vicious again?”
Eve pouted. “You can see through that way too easily.”
“You make it easy. You’re almost too convincing in your lies, my dear, sta stated.
Eve shrugged. “I learned from the best.”
Mao ignored her comment and turned his chair to face the doorway. “I take it the mission went well?”
“Yup, even though I was all on my lonesome. What’s with Julia trying to get Sith committed? She trying to get killed?”
Mao sighed heavily at the mention of Julia. “Most likely. Sometimes, I wish our Sith would just kill her and be done with it.”
* Hate
Stronger than*
Eve seemed shocked. “Mao!”
“Did you write up your report?” he asked, changing the subject.
Eve nodded. “Yeah. On that bitch’s desk as we speak,” Eve grumbled.
“Mrs. Nameki probably wouldn’t appreciate that, Eve.”
Eve shrugged. “Like I care what that dried up old hag thinks. She bothers me.”
Mao shook his head. “Eve, remember that you are no goddess. You cannot control life or death, just because you deal out the latter. You must be careful, the knowledge you carry, the lives of those in your group, are far more precious than petty feelings of pride.”
*Life*
Eve nodded before kissing her only father figure on the cheek and escaping out the door. “Enjoy your meeting with Julia, Mao!” she bid as she trotted off.
~*~*~*~
*If I lied to you would you still believe?
Mend your soul from my little fucking game*
Eve smiled softly at the two, exhausted and sleeping males on either side of her upright form. The black cigarette in her fingers seemed the only light in the room, save the pale moonlight. Gently, she touched each of the men, caressing each facial feature, dragging her fingers through their tangled hair with her pale fingers.
*Forgive me for all you've done*
She could hear the faint sounds of club downstairs being closed up for the day. The place had been packed, as it usually was, raking in a new tidal wave of money her way. Silently, she pondered Mao’s words.
‘You cannot control life or death, just because you deal out the latter. You must be careful, the knowledge you carry, the lives of those in your group, are far more precious than petty feelings of pride…’
She didn’t understand him. Sure she was careful with the knowledge she held on each of them. She protected it like a most precious gem. She would never let anyone, even those the information pertained to, have it. But pride? Why would he lecture her on pride? Was it not her pride that kept her alive? That made her horde that precious information from syndicate anuntyunty hunter alike?
*Have I made your life a mess?
Is your soul perverted just like mine?
Inconvenienced by distress
Let it go, there's nowhere left to hide*
She wondered many things. Why Julia insisted that Sith be committed? Why she thought that she was so sneaky, that she had passed beneath Eve’s radar, when she was well aware of Julia’s plans, only didn’t care. Julia would try to tear them apart. She would attempt to break the bonds of Vicious and Spike, but in the end, she would lose. Julia was an idiot, and Eve knew that. It was her pride that told her so. So, why did Mao think it was bad?
* Shame
Stronger than
Pride
Stronger than
Hate
Stronger than
Life*
Eve felt a tug on either side of her waist. Spike and Vicious were being attacked by their nightmares again. Their memories of a time long past, but still traumatic. She sighed and extinguished her burnt down cigarette. She then snuggled down and let them curl into her arms. She felt loved at these moments. She wouldn’t give up these moments for anything. She wouldn’t give them up. Niether the boys, nor Sith. They were hers, and if she had any say, would remain so until her death.
*If I lied to you would you still believe?
Mend your soul from my little fucking game*
Julia was a fool if she thought she could take her favorite toys away. If that blonde bimbo thought she could destroy all she, Eve, had built. She was the master manipulator, and one of the most feared assassins out there, next to Sith. If Julia thought she could destroy her, she was sadly mistaken.
* Stronger than life*
No one took what was hers.
~*~*~*~