The Calm
folder
+. to F › Cowboy Bebop
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
49
Views:
2,517
Reviews:
34
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
+. to F › Cowboy Bebop
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
49
Views:
2,517
Reviews:
34
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Cowboy Bebop, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Guilt
Disclaimer: Don' own Bebop or Sith... but damnit I wish I did! They're all so cool
*****
Song: Fine Again
Artist: Seether
*****
The Calm
Chapter 36: Guilt
~*~*~*~
Julia had split. As though knowing that he and Sith were coming. It had been hell to drive her to the hospital, Amaya’s body cradled in Sith’s armhe whe was wrapped in a blanket that he kept in the back seat, just in case he needed to get out of the apartment and needed warmth. Now, it cov covering the bloodied and broken form of his friend.
“Is she even alive?” he asked, his voice barely a whisper.
Sith nodded. “She is too strong to die.”
Spike snorted. “That’s for damn sure.”
The rest of the ride was in a tense silence. The hospital had been in an uproar as soon as they saw Sith carrying Amaya. Obviously, they had been there before, and the nursing staff wanted to avoid pissing Sith off as much as possible. Strangly enough, one of the nurses seemed to be very familiar with Sith, asking about Adrian as she escorted him and the blood haired assassin to a waiting room. The nurse also sported a very familiar looking bite mark on her hand. Spike had laughed, this had been Sith’s midwife. No wonder the nursing staff avoided Sith like the plague.
~*~*~*~
*It seems that every day’s the same and I’m left to discover on my own
It seems like everything is grey and there’s no color to behold*
Seven hours in surgery. That’s how long it had taken to set all her bones and stitch up all her wounds. Her shoulders had been dislocated, but easily set, the least serious of her wounds. Her jaw had to be wired into alignment, her right ankle and left arm, broken in multiple places. She had been carved into like a Thanksgiving Day turkey. Her tattoos, removed with what appeared to be a dull knife. She had been tortured within an inch of her life, and Spike could feel nothing but guilt.
“Do you want to call them?” he asked.
Sith glanced to the mossy haired man, her expression unreadable.
*They say its over and I’m fine again, yeah
Try to stay sober, feels like I’m dying again, yeah*
Spike wondered if she felt like he did. Did guilt wrack her brain? Did she feel ghost pains through her body? The doctor had said that Amaya would never see out her left eye again, it had been so badly damaged. That she could never have children again, that she would be lucky if she could walk again. That is, if she ever woke up. There was always the chance that she would remain comatose for the rest of her life.
*And I’m aware now, how everything’s going to be fine, one day
Too late, I’m in hell*
He let his head fall into his hands. If only he had gotten there sooner, if only he had been able to save her before Julia ever had a chance to hurt her. He wept as he muddled over those sanarios. He blamed himself as the tears fell.
*And I’m prepared now how seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day, too late
Just as well*
“Mr. Spiegel?” a soft voice interrupted his pity party.
Spike looked up. Sith was gone. Where? He couldn’t tell. The nurse that had been Sith’s midwife stood before him in her candy-pink uniform. “Miss Ryu is out of recovery and is in the ICU. Would you like to see her?” she asked.
*I feel the dream in me expire and there’s one left to blame it on
I hear you label me a liar ’cause I can’t seem to get this through*
Spike nodded slowly as he followed the nurse down the hall. He’d been through a similar procedure when Jack had been born and been placed in the NICU. He donned the blue apron and the booties to cover his feet while placing a mask over his face with a practiced ease. He then followed the nurse into a dim room, filled with many beds until they came upon Amaya’s unconscious form. He took a seat in a chair, provided by the nurse and took a hold of Amaya’s uncast hand.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get there in time,” he whispered softly.
Amaya gave no response. The breathing machine made its clicking sounds whilst the other devices blinked and gave out silent readings.
*You say it’s over- I can sigh again, yeah
Why try to stay sober when I’m dying here*
“Amaya, we need you to get better. Aurora’s going to need her mother, James is going to need his girlfriend, Vicious is… well, I don’t really know what he is to you anymore, but he’s gonna need you, so is Sith, and Faye, and Jet and Ed, and Me. You have no choice in this, girl, you have to get through this. I know, you think I’m being harsh, but Amaya. We love you, we need you. Please, don’t leave us again. Vicious is catatonic without you. Do you know how annoying that is? I mean, he already says practically nothing, now I can’t even see him in his own eyes. And Sith… man is she edgy. You should have seen her when she got those guards. And here I thought she couldn’t get any scarier,” he rambled softly.
*And I’m aware now, how everything’s going to be fine, one day
Too late, I’m in hell*
“Mr. Spiegel, I’m afraid that, until we can move her to another room, you can’t spend much time here,” the nurse warned. “The doctor has asked me to escort you out of the ward for now. You can visit her tomorrow.”
Spike nodded. He then squeezed Amaya’s hand and pressed a kiss through his mask against her clammy, pale cheek. “See you tomorrow, Amaya. I’m bringing the entire group too. Please wake up soon, sleeping beauty,” he bid silently to her as he followed the nurse outside the ward.
*And I’m prepared now how seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day, too late
Just as well*
The nurse gave him a gentle squeeze on the shoulder before leaving him to the stoic looking woman in the waiting room. “Did you see her?” she asked.
*And I’m not scared now*
Spike nodded. “Did you call them?”
Sith gave a curt nod. “How does she look?” she asked.
*I must assure you, you’re never gonna get away*
Spike smiled. “Better than when we found her, believe me. You’ll get to see her tomorrow.”
“Where is she?” she asked.
*And I’m not scared now*
“Intensive care… Katy, she looked so helpless, so small. I mean, I’ve seen her in the hospital before. God knows she gets into enough scrapes that she needs one every now and again, but Katy, she… she… I thought I could break her with a touch, she looked so fragile. I felt really helpless in there. About as helpless with Vicious’ state.”
Sith nodded, seeming to ignore his calling her Katy. “I’ll drive home,” she commanded.
*And I’m not scared now*
Spike nodded. He couldn’t drive if he wanted to, he felt so unhinged. He kept a slow, steady pace behind Sith, his mind wandering as he bid each of the more than helpful nurses goodbye. All he could think was that he had failed Amaya, that he should have done something to prevent her, now comatose, state. He cast Sith a sideways glance as they drove towards the apartment. Facing the others was going to be hell. He then noticed that both he and Sith looked horrible. Hair mussed, clothes rumpled and bloodstained. They looked as though they had been through hell and back. And for all the others in the seemingly crowded apartment, they had been. And hell had scarred them both.
*And I’m aware now, how everything’s going to be fine, one day
Too late, I’m in hell
And I’m prepared now how seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day, too late
Just as well*
~*~*~*~
Levii: A sad chapter, yes. But Amaya has at least been recovered, and is alive. If you want to hear Sith's thoughts, read Shadows. Natakamani is just an amazing writer and she captures things in a way that I don't. Just a little something for you chica! REVIEW ME PEOPLE AND MAYBE I'LL GIVE YOU A SHOUT OUT! REEEVIEEEW MEEE! REVIEW!
*****
Song: Fine Again
Artist: Seether
*****
The Calm
Chapter 36: Guilt
~*~*~*~
Julia had split. As though knowing that he and Sith were coming. It had been hell to drive her to the hospital, Amaya’s body cradled in Sith’s armhe whe was wrapped in a blanket that he kept in the back seat, just in case he needed to get out of the apartment and needed warmth. Now, it cov covering the bloodied and broken form of his friend.
“Is she even alive?” he asked, his voice barely a whisper.
Sith nodded. “She is too strong to die.”
Spike snorted. “That’s for damn sure.”
The rest of the ride was in a tense silence. The hospital had been in an uproar as soon as they saw Sith carrying Amaya. Obviously, they had been there before, and the nursing staff wanted to avoid pissing Sith off as much as possible. Strangly enough, one of the nurses seemed to be very familiar with Sith, asking about Adrian as she escorted him and the blood haired assassin to a waiting room. The nurse also sported a very familiar looking bite mark on her hand. Spike had laughed, this had been Sith’s midwife. No wonder the nursing staff avoided Sith like the plague.
~*~*~*~
*It seems that every day’s the same and I’m left to discover on my own
It seems like everything is grey and there’s no color to behold*
Seven hours in surgery. That’s how long it had taken to set all her bones and stitch up all her wounds. Her shoulders had been dislocated, but easily set, the least serious of her wounds. Her jaw had to be wired into alignment, her right ankle and left arm, broken in multiple places. She had been carved into like a Thanksgiving Day turkey. Her tattoos, removed with what appeared to be a dull knife. She had been tortured within an inch of her life, and Spike could feel nothing but guilt.
“Do you want to call them?” he asked.
Sith glanced to the mossy haired man, her expression unreadable.
*They say its over and I’m fine again, yeah
Try to stay sober, feels like I’m dying again, yeah*
Spike wondered if she felt like he did. Did guilt wrack her brain? Did she feel ghost pains through her body? The doctor had said that Amaya would never see out her left eye again, it had been so badly damaged. That she could never have children again, that she would be lucky if she could walk again. That is, if she ever woke up. There was always the chance that she would remain comatose for the rest of her life.
*And I’m aware now, how everything’s going to be fine, one day
Too late, I’m in hell*
He let his head fall into his hands. If only he had gotten there sooner, if only he had been able to save her before Julia ever had a chance to hurt her. He wept as he muddled over those sanarios. He blamed himself as the tears fell.
*And I’m prepared now how seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day, too late
Just as well*
“Mr. Spiegel?” a soft voice interrupted his pity party.
Spike looked up. Sith was gone. Where? He couldn’t tell. The nurse that had been Sith’s midwife stood before him in her candy-pink uniform. “Miss Ryu is out of recovery and is in the ICU. Would you like to see her?” she asked.
*I feel the dream in me expire and there’s one left to blame it on
I hear you label me a liar ’cause I can’t seem to get this through*
Spike nodded slowly as he followed the nurse down the hall. He’d been through a similar procedure when Jack had been born and been placed in the NICU. He donned the blue apron and the booties to cover his feet while placing a mask over his face with a practiced ease. He then followed the nurse into a dim room, filled with many beds until they came upon Amaya’s unconscious form. He took a seat in a chair, provided by the nurse and took a hold of Amaya’s uncast hand.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get there in time,” he whispered softly.
Amaya gave no response. The breathing machine made its clicking sounds whilst the other devices blinked and gave out silent readings.
*You say it’s over- I can sigh again, yeah
Why try to stay sober when I’m dying here*
“Amaya, we need you to get better. Aurora’s going to need her mother, James is going to need his girlfriend, Vicious is… well, I don’t really know what he is to you anymore, but he’s gonna need you, so is Sith, and Faye, and Jet and Ed, and Me. You have no choice in this, girl, you have to get through this. I know, you think I’m being harsh, but Amaya. We love you, we need you. Please, don’t leave us again. Vicious is catatonic without you. Do you know how annoying that is? I mean, he already says practically nothing, now I can’t even see him in his own eyes. And Sith… man is she edgy. You should have seen her when she got those guards. And here I thought she couldn’t get any scarier,” he rambled softly.
*And I’m aware now, how everything’s going to be fine, one day
Too late, I’m in hell*
“Mr. Spiegel, I’m afraid that, until we can move her to another room, you can’t spend much time here,” the nurse warned. “The doctor has asked me to escort you out of the ward for now. You can visit her tomorrow.”
Spike nodded. He then squeezed Amaya’s hand and pressed a kiss through his mask against her clammy, pale cheek. “See you tomorrow, Amaya. I’m bringing the entire group too. Please wake up soon, sleeping beauty,” he bid silently to her as he followed the nurse outside the ward.
*And I’m prepared now how seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day, too late
Just as well*
The nurse gave him a gentle squeeze on the shoulder before leaving him to the stoic looking woman in the waiting room. “Did you see her?” she asked.
*And I’m not scared now*
Spike nodded. “Did you call them?”
Sith gave a curt nod. “How does she look?” she asked.
*I must assure you, you’re never gonna get away*
Spike smiled. “Better than when we found her, believe me. You’ll get to see her tomorrow.”
“Where is she?” she asked.
*And I’m not scared now*
“Intensive care… Katy, she looked so helpless, so small. I mean, I’ve seen her in the hospital before. God knows she gets into enough scrapes that she needs one every now and again, but Katy, she… she… I thought I could break her with a touch, she looked so fragile. I felt really helpless in there. About as helpless with Vicious’ state.”
Sith nodded, seeming to ignore his calling her Katy. “I’ll drive home,” she commanded.
*And I’m not scared now*
Spike nodded. He couldn’t drive if he wanted to, he felt so unhinged. He kept a slow, steady pace behind Sith, his mind wandering as he bid each of the more than helpful nurses goodbye. All he could think was that he had failed Amaya, that he should have done something to prevent her, now comatose, state. He cast Sith a sideways glance as they drove towards the apartment. Facing the others was going to be hell. He then noticed that both he and Sith looked horrible. Hair mussed, clothes rumpled and bloodstained. They looked as though they had been through hell and back. And for all the others in the seemingly crowded apartment, they had been. And hell had scarred them both.
*And I’m aware now, how everything’s going to be fine, one day
Too late, I’m in hell
And I’m prepared now how seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day, too late
Just as well*
~*~*~*~
Levii: A sad chapter, yes. But Amaya has at least been recovered, and is alive. If you want to hear Sith's thoughts, read Shadows. Natakamani is just an amazing writer and she captures things in a way that I don't. Just a little something for you chica! REVIEW ME PEOPLE AND MAYBE I'LL GIVE YOU A SHOUT OUT! REEEVIEEEW MEEE! REVIEW!