Remember my Love

Remember my Love
Chapter 4


Fussing around in the kitchen was just a little bit of a distraction, but Cho Hakkai needed something bigger. He was seething inside. If he could find out who had done that damage to his best friend he would gladly remove the limiters he always wore. He would not stop until every last person was dead. It would not be the first time and certainly would not be the last time he truly let him self go.

He had found long ago that bread making was very therapeutic. The dough had to be kneaded so an occasional extra pounding could be forgiven. Usually by the time he was ready to set the dough aside to proof a lot of frustration was worked out. And the innkeeper, bless his heart was more than willing to allow Hakkai use of the kitchen as long as he shared what was being made.

It was now two days since Sanzo had brought Gojyo back. He was beginning to heal physically but mentally…Hakkai just shook his head. Mentally Gojyo was no where near back to normal. He slammed his fist into the elastic dough on the work surface. "Dammit it all to hell and back again."

A hand settled on his shoulder. "Hakkai?"

Surprised, he swung around. He met the steady but tired gaze of Sanzo. "I'm sorry Sanzo, I'm just so frustrated."

"Believe me I know."

"Can I help you with something?"

"More tea please." Sanzo held out the empty teapot.

"You need to eat too; you know that very well Sanzo." The blond was looking everywhere but at the healer. "Sanzo." He said sharply. "You've got to eat more than you have been."

"Stop being such a mother hen. I'm fine."

"Bull." He snapped. "Don't you think I've noticed that you don’t even bother wearing jeans under your robe? Is that because they just fall off anyway?"

Sanzo gave a light chuckle. "Actually you'll be happy to know I have been eating some." He ran long fingers through his hair. "I've been mooching off of Gojyo's plate once in awhile."

Hakkai blinked several times. "You've been snitching food?" he tried to suppress the mirthful snort from escaping. "Dear god what's the world coming to?"

"Hakkai how long do you think it'll be before he's back to normal?"

The green eyed man could only shake his head. "There's no telling."

"I was afraid you'd say that."

"You know I was thinking…we ought to send a message to his brother that he's been found." Hakkai wiped his hands dry. "I believe it would be common courtesy."

Sanzo sighed. "I suppose you're right. But I'm not crazy about seeing any of them again."

"Seeing who?" asked a voice behind them. They both turned to find red eyes looking at them intently.

"What are you doing out of bed Gojyo?" Hakkai asked.

"I was bored and all alone and needed to piss so I thought I'd get up and walk around." He leaned on the doorframe. "So what's going on?"

"Well…" Hakkai began.

"We were just talking about letting some acquaintances know that we found you." Said Sanzo.

"Ah I see." Gojyo was inching his way closer to Sanzo. "Are you going to help me into bed? I like when you're close."

Sanzo froze. "What the hell…?"

"Gojyo!" Hakkai reprimanded.

"Well isn't that why you bought me back? Cause I'm only useful to someone like you as a whore right?" he pressed him self tightly to Sanzo's back. "I bet you're fun with all that pent up frustration…priest."

"Injured or not I'll kill you for that. But I'll leave to save the others the heartache of loosing you again." He stormed away.

"What'd I do? really. I thought that's why he wanted me so bad."

Hakkai shook his head. "No Gojyo you're so much more to all of us. And you were never treated like a whore of any kind. We all love you."

Gojyo hung his head. "Damn I guess I read that all wrong."

"Read what wrong?"

"Well I'd wake up and he'd be touching me and all. So I just thought that he wanted me that way. Everyone else does."

"He's been worried sick about you." Hakkai then pressed his lips together in annoyance. "It's not my place to explain your relationship with Genjo Sanzo." He turned away.

Gojyo shrugged and turned. Spotting Goku he called out. "Hey kid I could use a hand to get back up stairs." He hobbled to where Goku was waiting at the foot of stairway. "You don't have to hold on or nothing just be close by in case okay?"

"Sure Gojyo no problem."

In the kitchen Hakkai was gingerly taking the baked to perfection bread out of the oven. "Why is this so difficult? When will he remember?" the bread rolled out of the well greased pan with ease. "Why did he have to pick Sanzo of all people?"

That day, two years ago was burned deeply into his memory. Much like the death of Kanan.

He had noticed Yaone was trapped by some falling rubble and in spite of his own injuries tried in vain to reach her in time. Then there was Gojyo throwing her to safety…right before the castle was entangled with the Maten scripture. He knew he screamed for Gojyo but Sanzo's anguished voice rose the loudest drowning out every other voice.

He secretly but not strongly held Sanzo responsible for Gojyo's apparent death. He knew the degree of Sanzo's grief and that he languished in his guilt over what had happened. But somehow still in a tiny little corner of his subconscious Hakkai felt that it was partly the fault of Priest Genjo Sanzo.

No Sanzo was just doing what needed to be done. It was not his fault that Gojyo happened to be there. He did try to stop it but was not in time. Hakkai also was guilt ridden. If he had not allowed him self to be injured I could have been him. He could then be by his beloved's side. That would have been for the best after all. Not Gojyo. He did not deserve death like that.

Well enough of that he chastised himself. Gojyo was back and recovering nicely sans memory.

Sanzo reentered the kitchen holding a slip of paper. "I've written a short note to his brother letting him know we found our missing pain in the ass."

"Sanzo!"

"Hakkai don't start with me…"

"I was just going to ask if you were alright. I do know how upset you were with that little stunt Gojyo pulled."

Sanzo shuddered. "It's like being touched by a stranger."

Hakkai nodded. "But it is still Gojyo."

"Yeah I know. But it's a bit creepy. There's someone else staring out of his eyes." The blond shuddered slightly. "Even if he is still a smart ass, he's not our smart ass."

"I know what you mean." He took the note from Sanzo's fingers. "I think Hakuryu can find them where ever they are." Sanzo nodded and turned away.

"Thank you Hakkai."