The Real Reason

Disclaimer: The only thing I get from writing this is something to keep me occupied and to boost my ego with lovely reviews.

Note: Ha, ha! Chapter five. Sorry it took so long to post this, but I’ve been a bit preoccupied with my other Naruto fic. So here it is, with some lovely smut between Kenshin and Sano. Enjoy!


Chapter Five: Guilty Love


Kenshin walked unhurried back to the dojo, wobbling subtly from the pain in his lower torso. His gaze was down cast, his mind deep in thought. He couldn’t believe what he just did. He actually agreed to duel Saitoh again, and for a now seemingly ridiculous reason. Kenshin wasn’t even sure if he’d be able to beat his former arch-rival. Saitoh would not hold back, and remembering their last battle, neither would he. They wouldn’t be interrupted this time, so who knew what would happen. Kenshin could very likely be going to his own death. He shuddered at the thought, and realized how stupid he was for not realizing it earlier. Not matter which way the battle went, it would end badly. One or both of them would be dead, Kenshin was sure of that.

Kenshin drug his feet, not caring that people had to walk around him and cursing him under their breath. How could he get out of this? There was not way out now. The samurai code wouldn’t allow it. He had to meet Saitoh in the forest two days from now. Good to know how and when your life will end.....

Kenshin barely noticed when he reached the Kamiya dojo, and absentmindedly walked through the gate, not caring if anyone saw him enter. But he noticed no one was around, and he realized they must all still be asleep. Tired himself suddenly Kenshin sat down on the steps to the main house, resting in the cool shade. He withdrew his sword, and leaned it innocently against the wall as he lay down on the cold wood, trying to calm his thoughts.

Kenshin started when he felt a presence near him, and opened his eyes to a surprised looking Sano staring down at him. Sano smiled warmly and said, “Watch’a doing Kenshin? Taking a nap?” Kenshin tried to smile weakly, but found he couldn’t even manage a grin. He made no move to stand up as Sano took a seat at his feet, his long legs draped over the steps of the porch.

“What’s wrong Kenshin? You seem upset about something.” The last thing Kenshin wanted was for Sano to be here. But he couldn’t bring himself to send the teen away. Sano’s presence was intoxicating, and after Saitoh had made him realize his not so friendly feelings towards the younger man, he could barely contain his lust.

Sano looked on as Kenshin sifted through his thoughts, and Sano started to become worried. He’d never seen him like this, not even when Kaoru was kidnaped by Jinei. He wondered what could have happened to the rurouni to make him act like this.

Kenshin knew he shouldn’t tell Sano about his duel, and he even was reluctant to tell him all that Saitoh had said. But he needed to know, even if he’d end up hating him for it.

“Sano?” Sano’s head perked at his name, and soft brown eyes gazed patiently at Kenshin. God how he loved those eyes. “I need to tell you something.”

“Like what?” Kenshin slowly rose to sit up so he could be face to face with Sanosuke. This was going to be one of the hardest things he’d ever have to do. “I know...” Started Kenshin, but he found it difficult to continue. He couldn’t think of a way to say what he needed to say without coming across as jealous. “Know about what, Kenshin?” Sano’s voice was laced with worry, and he knew Kenshin had something important to say.

Kenshin lowered his eyes, not wanting to see the look on Sano’s face at what he was about to say. “I know about you and Saitoh.” Sano started at the words, and his face flushed uncontrollably as he stuttered. “Oh, w-well, yeah... pretty strange, huh?” Sano tried to laugh it off, but Kenshin looked as depressed as ever. Did the fact that he was with Saitoh now bother him? Or was it something else?

Placing a hand tenderly on Kenshin’s shoulder, Sano said, “Kenshin, are you okay with that?” If anyone’s opinion mattered to Sano, it was Kenshin’s, and he wouldn’t be able to stand it if the rurouni didn’t approve. Kenshin smiled at the comforting gesture, and slowly grasped Sano’s large hand with his own, running his pale fingers over the palm. Sano tensed at the contact, and his face flushed even more when he noticed the look in the redhead’s eyes. It was loving, but it was also full of.... lust. Sano took a quick breath at the realization, and tensed even more when Kenshin’s violet gaze met his own.

“Does it really matter what I think Sano?” Sano swallowed hard, and tried to keep his voice steady with the smaller man still tickling his hand. “Of course it does Kenshin. You’re my best friend.” Kenshin nodded, and continued to ghost his fingers over Sano’s flesh. “So we’re friends?” Sano nodded dumbly. Kenshin sighed. So that was all he was to Sano? Just a close friend, and nothing more? Then why was he so nervous when he touched him like this? There was more to it.

“But I’ve seen the way you look at me.” Sano blushed even more. “W-what do you mean?” Kenshin smiled as he brought Sano’s other hand to his lap, and held both of the younger man’s hands as he continued. “You don’t have to hide it Sanosuke. I know that you’ve wanted me for some time now, that I have.”

Sano quickly took his hands away, and said angrily, “That may have been, but I’m with Saitoh now. You just can’t spring this kind of thing on me right when I’m finally in a relationship. What, now that I’m taken you finally feel something for me?” The accusation cut through Kenshin like a katana. Sano did have a point. He hadn’t realized his dormant feelings for Sano until he saw him with another man. But they were genuine, and had been there all along. “I love you Sanosuke.” Sano stopped fuming at the words, and all his anger melted away with the confession. He could see how hard it was for the rurouni to say, and he said, “I love you too Kenshin, but.... it’s too late. We can’t do anything about it.”

Kenshin shook his head. How naive Sano still was. He actually fell for Saitoh’s lies. If he even took long enough to even talk to Sano. “Sano, Saitoh, he....” Kenshin felt ashamed suddenly. It wasn’t his place to tell about Saitoh’s infidelity, but he knew he had to tell him before Saitoh did.

Sano stared at the redhead. His heart was beating fast in his chest, and he dreaded what Kenshin was about to say. “Saitoh what, Kenshin?” Kenshin placed a small hand on his forehead. He suddenly had a raging headache, and he took a deep sigh before continuing. “He.... doesn’t love you.” Sano’s eyes went wide. “What the hell do you mean? How the hell would you know?”

“I had sex with him this morning...” Kenshin closed his eyes and prepared for the outburst that was sure to come, but surprisingly it didn’t. When he looked up he saw a hurt Sano shaking slightly, and when he tried to place a hand on his shoulder Sano viciously brushed it off. “How could you?” Sano’s voice was filled with anguish and betrayal, and unshed tears sprung to his eyes. Kenshin felt like crying himself, but kept it inside as he explained himself. “It was the only time Sano. It just.... happened.” The excuse didn’t seem to make the young man feel any better, and Kenshin decided not to say anything more.

Sano’s shoulders convulsed from his crying, but he didn’t make a sound as the tears fell silently to the wooden porch. Kenshin couldn’t stand to see Sano like this. It was the only time he had seen the young man cry. Without even thinking Kenshin leaned forward, wrapping his small arms around Sanosuke’s shoulders. Sano surprisingly didn’t resist, and let Kenshin draw him closer. Kenshin could feel Sano’s own arms snake around his torso, and he let out a gasp at the contact.

After being held for several more minutes Sano’s crying ceased, and he clutched his friend closer to himself, loving how sweet Kenshin smelled. He was mad at him for betraying him, but it was more than likely that Saitoh had forced him into it. Kenshin would never be the type to just outwardly seduce someone out of the blue. So they were both to blame, but Saitoh to a higher extent. It made Sano feel a little better, but not much. He was a fool for believing that bastard was capable of loving anything. And he deserved this for being the ahou he now knew he was. But at least he had Kenshin, who seemed to truly care for him, unlike Saitoh.

Kenshin was shocked when he felt Sano’s lips graze his own. He looked up into the younger man’s eyes, and all he saw was sadness and need. Kenshin knew he shouldn’t be doing this to his friend with Sano in such emotional turmoil, but his body acted of it’s own volition, kissing Sano back and grasping the back of his head. Kenshin opened his mouth to Sasnosuke, and he felt the youth’s delving tongue caress his own. Not breaking the kiss Kenshin lowered Sano on top of him, but Sano paused, and withdrawing from Kenshin said, “No Kenshin. I want you to take me.” Sano was blushing furiously, and Kenshin smiled as he flipped Sano over, reversing their previous positions.

Sano moaned as Kenshin parted his legs, and he could feel himself becoming more and more hard by the second. Kenshin smiled as he felt Sano’s erection through the fabric, and ghosted his hand over it to make Sano slightly buck into him He then started to untie Sano’s pants, and had them off and flung aside in a heartbeat. Sano whimpered at the cool morning air hitting his heated flesh, and almost screamed when he felt Kenshin wrap his small hand around his shaft.

Kenshin gently stroked Sano, making the young man moan in pleasure. Kenshin could feel himself starting to get hard, and it was difficult to hold himself back, especially when Sano had offered to be the one receiving. Kenshin had never been the one ‘on top’. Saitoh would never allow it. In a way Kenshin was a virgin again, and very much looked forward to finally having Sano.

Sano was feeling immeasurably guilty about doing this, but he had always desired Kenshin even from the start. And it didn’t matter what he did now; him and Saitoh were through. Sano’s heart ached at the thought, but he knew it was over. He wasn’t even really sure it had been anything in the first place. He tried to banish all thoughts of the wolf from his mind as Kenshin’s hand moved faster, and Sano could feel himself on the brink. But Kenshin stopped abruptly, and before Sano had time to protest he was flipped over onto his stomach, his throbbing arousal hitting the cold wood. Kenshin smiled as he leaned over Sano, and grazed a finger over the young man’s entrance, making Sano plead for more. Kenshin slowly slide his finger into the tight ring, wiggling his digit around to find Sano’s perfect spot. He finally did find it, and rubbed it incessantly to make Sano rock back into him. He was still so tight, and Kenshin figured that they probably had only had sex once or twice. Kenshin slide in another finger, stretching Sano to further prepare him.

Sano couldn’t take much more. He needed Kenshin inside him; and NOW. “Ken, ah... Kenshin, just do it already.” Kenshin grinned warmly at Sano’s eagerness, and he deftly withdrew his fingers to untie his hakama. Sano whimpered at the loss of Kenshin’s probing fingers, but he knew it would soon be replaced by something even better.

Untying the knot Kenshin rolled down his hakama, not taking them off all the way but just enough to free his arousal. Sano gasped as he felt Kenshin aim himself at his entrance, and had to cover his mouth to stifle a scream as the rurouni thrust into him. Kenshin went slow at first, establishing a pace both their bodies seemed to naturally move to. Sano muttered incoherent sounds of ecstasy into his palm, trying to keep himself from climaxing as long as possible.

Kenshin marveled at the feel of Sano surrounding him. He was being gripped so tightly, and Kenshin now knew why Saitoh had enjoyed it so much. No girl could ever compare to this feeling. Kenshin thrust harder, almost making Sano fall of the steps of the porch. Kenshin could start to feel himself losing control, and he went as deep as he could into the younger man, stifling gasps as he approached his long awaited release.

Sano couldn’t hold it anymore. With one last shudder he finally came, his essence spilling onto the smooth wood. Kenshin tried to hold out, but found it to be too much, and with one last thrust, going in as deep as he could, he finally climaxed in Sano’s body. Sano hissed at the sensation of being filled with the warmth, and fell back onto the porch as Kenshin withdrew his now flaccid member from Sanosuke.

Both men simply laid on the wood, both panting heavily. Sano slowly rose on his elbows, and quickly recovered his white pants, ruefully slipping them on while he was still covered in his own seed. Kenshin followed suit and hastily retied his hakama, weary of Kaoru or Yahiko coming on the scene with them both disheveled and half naked.

Neither said a word as they dressed, until Sano finally broke the silence. “Kenshin...that... was great.” Kenshin gave Sano a weak smile as he said, “I enjoyed it too, that I did.” Sano looked at Kenshin, wondering why the redhead was acting more depressed from before. “Kenshin, what’s wrong?”

Kenshin shook his head unconvincingly. The rurouni thought that after finally being with Sanosuke, he’d feel somewhat at peace. But he almost felt more hollow than before, and he didn’t know why.

“I don’t know Sanosuke. I don’t feel very good all of sudden, that I do not.” Sano went to wrap an arm around his lover, but Kenshin gently pushed him away. “I think I need to be alone for a while, that I do.” Was all he said before leaving a confused Sano out on the porch.

As he walked to his room, Kenshin ran into Kaoru, and he couldn’t help but lower his gaze from the girl. He knew she would be able to detect that something was wrong with him, and didn’t say a word as he passed. Kaoru looked after him with a worried expression on her face, but brushed it off as she headed to the bath.

Sano sat where he was dumbfounded. Had he done something wrong? Why would Kenshin leave so suddenly? He felt inadequate, and his heart felt like it was going to break for a second time that day. Trying to suppress more tears he walked out of the Kamiya gate, not even looking back once as he made his way home.

A/N: This originally was going to be the last chapter, but it would have taken up too much room to write in the duel with Saitoh too. So one more chap after this, and that’s it!! Oh, and sorry to any Sano fans out there for making him kind of a crybaby. But I think he’s just a big softy inside anyway, so I don’t think it’s THAT out of character.