Secret Confessions

It was a few days after the giant had appeared in Tokyo-3. Everything was back to normal or at least as normal can get.

“Shinji! Kaworu! Wake up; it’s time to help do some morning chores you two.” Misato called knocking on Shinji’s door a few times.

“Yeah, yeah Misato in a minute.” Wait…Misato? My homeroom teacher, why would she be living with me!?

“Something is wrong” Shinji whispered. Kaworu poked his head from above; apparently Shinji was sleeping on a bunk bed with his lover on the top bunk and Shinji on the bottom.

“Morning, love.” Kaworu smiled angelically.

Shinji jumped out of bed, “Hurry Kaworu we gotta get ready or Misato will skin us both.” He frantically grabbed some clothes and started to change. Kaworu jumped down from his bunk and did the same, neither caring to glance at each other. Shinji stepped out of the room, Kaworu soon followed.

“Misato what did you want?” Do I even question why she’s here, where my mother and father went?

Misato chucked a bag of trash at Shinji, “Its burnable trash day, please put that outside and Kaworu could you vacuum the house?” Misato handed Kaworu the vacuum and he hurriedly went to work. Shinji quickly walked down the stairs carrying the heavy bag of trash, it was full to the brim of instant dinners and ramen noodle cups.

Slowly Shinji returned reluctant to get another chore. When he entered the apartment Misato sat in the kitchen chugging down a beer and Kaworu was finishing with the vacuum.

“Please sit down Shinji” Shinji walked over to a chair and sat down across from Misato. “I-…is this about what happened to my parents? Why aren’t they here??” Shinji showed concern in his eyes and Misato sat up straight staring with seriousness at Shinji.

“I am in current custody of you, you’re mother…last night she was found dead deep in NERV. Don’t worry about your father though he wasn’t hurt and he gives his condolences to you but…because of how work has been increasing he has assigned me as your current guardian and that of Kaworu Nagisa. I-…I’m sorry Shinji” Misato stated like a conversation over coffee.

Shinji just stood there, the words not affecting him until Misato became concerned,

“Are you okay Shinji?” Misato asked and lightly shook Shinji. Kaworu had just put away the vacuum when he noticed tears streaming down Shinji’s face; Kaworu quickly ran over to Shinji and embraced him.

“I know it’ll be hard but please pull through for everyone Shinji, I told the school you and Kaworu wouldn’t be coming in today so you could be comforted…” Before Misato could finish, Shinji was grieving loudly, his breathing becoming irregular and the sharp heated pain in his chest reminding him of his existence continued to pierce his soul. Kaworu picked up Shinji from the chair and walked off to their room,

“I’m sorry that he’s like this Misato.” Kaworu said before entering the bedroom. He gently placed Shinji on his bed and joined him on top of the mattress, running his fingers through Shinji’s soft chestnut hair to comfort and lull Shinji to sleep.

Misato finished her beer and walked off to her room, she sat down in a chair at her desk staring at her phone.

“I’m not cut out for this crap; even the beer leaves a sour taste in my mouth. What are you thinking…commander?” she whispered to herself huddled over her desk. In Shinji’s room Kaworu kept on holding onto Shinji tightly. Shinji’s tears damping their clothes as he kept on whispering

“It’s all a dream, it’s all a dream. This isn’t my reality, give it back, give it back God.” Later in the night,

“I’m going out to drink with Kaji, you guys behave now.” Misato only glanced at the closed door and ventured off, wallowing away her problems in alcohol and ending up in Kaji’s arms. Shinji had been quiet for awhile lost in the embrace of Kaworu.

“Are you alright now my love?” Kaworu reassured himself, Shinji was asleep in his arms.

“Kaworu” Shinji whispered as he slowly opened his eyes. There he was wrapped in Kaworu’s arms lying on the couch. Everything was but a vivid dream and on the rooftop a man could be seen grinning wickedly at his desires. Shinji got up to look around the apartment, he found his mother Yui sleeping soundly in her room.

The day was marked Saturday on the calendar in the kitchen and the digital clock flickering 2:30 a.m. Shinji walked back to the couch and noticed his lover wasn’t there anymore. He turned away and felt someone pinning him against the wall,

“Thought you could get away from your nest huh?” Kaworu replied in a sexy tone. He kissed Shinji passionately, his silky hands wandering up Shinji’s shirt. Shinji let out soft moans signaling for Kaworu to enter, he plunged into Shinji’s mouth. Somehow Shinji ended up back in the couch pressed against the cushions, while Kaworu brushed up against him.

Their members screaming to be used, they both quickly discarded their clothes and Kaworu scavenged Shinji’s body, suckling at the nape of Shinji’s neck. Then Kaworu moved further down enjoying the sweet taste of Shinji, he teased by licking at Shinji’s inner thigh.

“Kaworu…do-don’t taunt me” Shinji managed to whisper. They both knew not to wake Yui up especially while doing such an act of passion together. Kaworu silently wrapped his tongue about Shinji’s member while slipping a finger into Shinji.

Shinji had to bite on his knuckles to stop himself from screaming with ecstasy. Kaworu bobbed his head up and down and added a digit or two into Shinji as he pulled in and out. After Shinji started to buck his hips against Kaworu more and more, he pulled his fingers out. He held Shinji just above his member,

“This is going to hurt a little and I’m sorry but…” Shinji just lowered himself in response quickly taking Kaworu into himself. Shinji didn’t care about pain; he only wanted to pleasure Kaworu.

Shinji pushed himself up and down Kaworu’s length, his hands against Kaworu’s chest. While Kaworu lay there on the couch releasing soft moans as he became closer and closer to climax. He decided to play a more active role, Kaworu held Shinji against his chest and he bucked his hips, he went faster and harder against Shinji. He pleased Shinji’s mouth, their tongues battling while Kaworu hit that sweet spot that always sent a shiver through Shinji’s entire body.

“I love that face you make when we’re like this.” Kaworu whispered in between kisses, his eyes open to admire the beauty of the blushed boy in front of him.

Shinji’s eyes were closed as he went over the edge,

“Kaworu” he moaned in a kiss as his seed spewed over their stomachs. Kaworu quickened his pace, face flushed and finally he released himself inside as Shinji’s ass continued to spasm after ejaculating. Kaworu slowly exited Shinji and licked the remainder off of their stomachs. They lay there as the Sun finally could be seen over the hills. Everything was at peace for now and so they returned to sleep enjoying the weekend, the days without tests, homework, or teachers.

The weekend was those days spent together, and to happily make new memories. How many new happy memories were to come is unknown.

It was mid afternoon; the Sun was almost beginning to set when:

“Unidentified object heading for Tokyo-3!” screeched the electronic voice of the Magi. Time seemed to flash with the ringing of Shinji’s phone, the clatter of feet on pavement down to NERV and the zipping of plug suits. All of the children entered their EVAs,

“Shinji you will be sent out and the others will be on stand-by if you need help.” Ritsuko announced over the intercom.

“Evangelion Unit 01 launch!” Misato ordered. Shinji skyrocketed out of NERV through various passages until he came to ground level with a thud, his EVA was unhinged from the launch pad and standing before him was an angel.

“What the hell is this!?” Shinji stammered, his EVA backing away.

“It’s an angel Shinji, mankind’s enemy. You must destroy it so that humanity can continue to live, now go!” Misato shouted via video feed. The angel had a giant red gem in its chest, a skull of a head with unnatural yellow eyes shining back at Shinji, its ribs were wrapped around the gem in its chest and the angel had green skin with shoulders of bone showing.

Shinji moved forward trying to punch the monster only to be caught by its strong hands, the angel twisted the EVA’s arm and a snapping of bone could be heard.

“Crap, Shinji why didn’t you use your AT Field!? Quick someone cut off his nerve connections with the EVA’s right arm.” Misato commanded. Shinji pulled out a progressive knife, the metal began to vibrate and glow a hue of pink. The EVA slashed at the angel with its left hand slicing through the angel’s skin and spewing blue blood on the ground. Shinji continued to advance on the creature and jumped on it, pinning it to the ground.

Shinji sliced the ribs encasing the red gem and began to thrust on the gem causing it to crack and shatter. Once shattered the angel became silent, Misato came on through Shinji’s video feed

“Good job Shinji, you can come back now.” She smiled. Shinji was full of sweat and he looked at the EVA’s left hand to see blue blood smothered over it, he looked back at the angel and the gem or core. There was a person that floated out of the cracks; he had short black hair, piercing yellow eyes and an evil grin.

“So we meet at last Shinji Ikari, I’ve been watching you for a long time.” The demon spoke.

Shinji’s EVA took a step back, “Ju-just who are you?” he questioned.

“I am here to show you reality, I am Regna.” Within a flash Shinji was warped from EVA to ground and into darkness with Regna.

“You see this, is what your life is meant to be like.” Regna said. Shinji looked around, he saw himself lying down on a bed listening to music then the scene changed, he was on a cruiser in the sea with Toji, Kenske and Misato as they met Asuka. Shinji saw Rei sacrifice herself to save Shinji and he saw Toji die because of his father’s orders, he saw Kaworu and how they fell in love.

Then finally he saw his nightmare, Kaworu was an angel. Shinji was ordered to kill him for they couldn’t co-exist and how betrayed he felt for believing in Kaworu. “You see, this is what reality is meant to be. But, someone is kind to you and has changed the world to make you happy, that world can’t go on any longer. You must accept reality Shinji, in order to do that you must…forget Kaworu.” Regna’s eyes sparkled; he leaned over to Shinji and kissed him. Shinji pushed Regna away wiping his mouth, “No, I don’t want this.”

Shinji put his hands over his ears screaming “Stop this! It’s not true, I didn’t kill Kaworu! Father did it, he made me…”

Regna just looked at Shinji huddled in a corner of darkness, “How pathetic, happiness doesn’t last forever Shinji, all good things have an end.” With that Regna disappeared and Shinji was inside his EVA.

“Shinji! Shinji! Are you there?” Misato screamed, Shinji looked over to see Misato concerned through the video feed, “I’m alright Misato” Shinji said returning to the launch pad and descending back to NERV.

Small tears fell from Shinji’s cheeks, “What does this mean? Why…” he whispered to himself. Shinji exited his EVA and quickly went to the changing room and put on his usual school uniform. He was confronted by arms and became wrapped around a warm body, “Kaworu…” Shinji whispered.

“I-I was worried about you Shinji.” Shinji noticed a fleeting tear from Kaworu.

“I’m alright now Kaworu, you don’t need to worry.” Shinji gave Kaworu an innocent peck on the lips and they walked home together.

“So what do you think Ritsuko?” Misato said taking a seat next to her childhood friend.

“Well he has potential; I think that he didn’t respond because of post-dramatic stress, he didn’t want to accept that he killed something.” Ritsuko was flipping through files on her computer checking the data acquired on the angel.

“We’ll have the intelligence division keep an eye on Shinji for now, if anything bad happens or if he’s deemed useless we’ll discard him like the others.” Ritsuko pulled up files on the children.

“It’s sad that only Asuka, Mana and Rei are the only others besides Shinji and Kaworu. Everyone else didn’t want to go through the turmoil and save humanity. But, then again we keep them under our protection now so they don’t need to worry too much.” Misato said sipping a can of coffee. Shinji and Kaworu entered the apartment, everything was normal. No one was home and both Kaworu and Shinji walked to Shinji’s bedroom, they collapsed on the bed once they entered and shut the door.

Both were too tired, they fell asleep upon impact of the soft sheets. Hours passed and Kaworu woke in the middle of the night, he had a gnawing presence telling him to go out onto the balcony. Kaworu went out and stared at the city, and then a person with black hair came floating down from the heavens.

“We meet again Kaworu Nagisa.” A smirk crossed Regna’s face.

“Regna, why did you leave Sachiel? Did you want to give reality back to the humans and let us, the angels return to nothingness?” Kaworu grabbed Regna from the air and threw him to the floor.

“Maybe I did, it’s better than living in a false world I’d rather be non-existent if it meant having the universe in order.” Regna said getting up from the floor and pushing Kaworu down; he gave Kaworu a few punches to the stomach and then kicked him at the legs and in his groin.

“You’re the one that doesn’t want things to change, but I want things to change. You need to learn to stop making yourself the victim from what had happened and stop writing your tragedies.” Regna picked up Kaworu by his hair and looked him in the eyes, gold staring at crimson.

“Aren’t you going to get up? Stop running away like your little Shinji did and go back to the way things were, you’re less than shit to me.” Regna spat at Kaworu and chucked his head back to the floor.

“I hope you choose soon before I make the decision for you, to live in a made up world or to return things to reality and allow Shinji to grow and move on.” Regna laughed and disappeared into the dark skies. Kaworu sat there thinking; licking his wounds and then went back inside. He decided to sleep on the couch because it was closer and he didn’t want Shinji questioning the wounds he was given by Regna.

While Shinji was sleeping the room he was in flickered back and forth from a bunk bed to a normal twin set. Existences wavered and the world now was being threatened. EVA pilots were limited to NERV, there’s no telling when the next angel will strike and what misfortune rests in its core. Kaworu sat there on the couch, in his dreams he thought of accepting death at Shinji’s hands. The feeling of his body becoming cold and his head snapping from his spine as the world was saved by one human teenage boy; then he woke up to the new day only hoping happiness would come around again to him.

TBC…