Bobbing for Apples

It had been three weeks since L had left, and Light had gotten nowhere. He was just so lost as to why L had to leave that it seemed impossible to figure out where he had gone. There were many reasons he had to know why L left but he refused to admit to himself that he missed him. He had lost himself in thoughts about everything they have ever talked about.

"No worries, Yagami." Light suddenly sat up straight in his chair, previously unaware that he had been resting his head on his arms on the table. "I placed first in England's Junior Tennis Championships..." He fisted his hair. Was it possible that he would return to England? He seriously doubted it. "Lived there for five years..." He could have felt at home there, assuming that Light had forgotten or maybe forgotten himself that it came in conversation. However, "Don't worry, this bit of information is useless as far as finding the identity of L is concerned." The question became 'Is this bit of information useful as far as finding the whereabouts of L?'

No way, he wouldn't be so daft as to do that. Or is it genius? He felt like if he chased after him, he'd be on a wild goose chase. At the same time, what was he doing here? Just jeapordizing everything. Somehow pretending to be interested in the case was stupid because L wasn't around. It's because I only joined in order to find out his name. Light had finally fully convinced himself of this... In other words, he was in complete denial. Yagami had told himself he only cared because he was in mortal danger so many times that he had stopped fighting with himself, which really seemed silly considering that he had that fire that always seemed to never burn out. Now it was blown out like a long forgotten birthday candle someone had left in the drawer because it was still usable. Yet next time, you know they would buy new candles anyways. Behind false smiles and speeches to hide himself, he was essentially walking around the building thinking and frowning. Basically, he was moping. Now that he remembered this, it was like someones birthday was around the corner.

He might be useful again, though it was unlikely. However, there was hope.

Truthfully, he had little memories of the next two days. He had basically told everyone he's leaving and not to follow him. "It's something I must do alone, no one can be put in harms way. Currently, he has no grudge against you. Let's not change that." It was as simple as that to make them go back to where they belonged. He had been on a plane and had ended up in England without really thinking. He was suddenly very happy he had done so well in school because this was a culture shock to him - at least he knew English. He was quite suddenly in his eyes in Southampton with no idea where he was going next. He sat on a bench for a moment and thought, lightly running his finger over his briefcase. Of course, he had to bring the other Death Note. In case of a stand off or something of the sort. He sat and stared as people walked by. He had studied the maps from around here but didn't know how to decipher which way was better than another.

In all actuality, this was the first time Light had jumped headfirst into something on gut instinct. This was the first time he was thoroughly confused. Ryuk was in the background, laughing at him constantly. He had for over three weeks now. Light had given up asking why and just got into the rental car and started driving. A half hour later he was in some old styled city, Ryuk munching on apples int he back. He looked it over with slight interest but now he felt less enthusiastic than before. He really reminded himself of L when they were first chained together. He passed a building, it was slightly fancy but really it was just something about it that made him stop. There was a wrought iron gate and children playing outside. It was a nice day. The strange thing about this place was that all the children weren't playing like normal children. There was a girl with a rubix cube, using the swing as just a chair. A boy sat on the field reading a book upside down. They all seemed off-kilter somehow, unearthly. They all sat in strange ways with a bored look in their eyes. They reminded him of L. Though he figured it was just his wish to find L that made him think that. That is, however, until someone yelled out. "K, get back here!" As two ran from each other in the background.

K? No, it has to be Kaye or something, a name. "No way, D!" D or Dee? That's impossible, they can't all have one-syllable names that just so happen to sound like letters! Furthermore, that look on their faces was that same boredom, that listlessness, that... L quality that angered him so much. Why am I so happy to see that expression now? He was able to keep himself steady as he walked to the iron gate. Eyes pierced him as he entered the entrance of the barrier, as if he had just walked into another world unexpectedly. He was an intruder, or so it seemed. He slowly and calmly approached the one who reminded him most of L, though shorter and definitely the hair was contrasting. He had white hair that was curly but his eyes had that same intensity. And to be honest, he dresses as simply.

"I'm looking for L." Light said in English. Somehow, the lazy-like gaze didn't change. Light was caught off guard - feeling as if he had been predictable. "Where is he?" The dead eyes of the child returned back to what was in front of him. It was some sort of animal skeleton toy that you construct the pieces together, usually using instructions. However, he had forgone them and was going quickly still.

"He's not here, Kira." Light stopped breathing. The kid put the last part in place then stood, staring at him blankly. "Come with me."

Light began breathing again somewhere between that playground and an office upstairs. The doors opened to a man behind a desk looking serious and expecting. "Yagami Light, welcome to Wammy's House." It was Watari.

"Wa-Watari? Wha- Where's L?" That was the first time he could remember actually stuttering. Today's just packed with fun little experiences...

"My name is Quillsh Wammy, Light. I own this orphanage so you could figure it out anyways, though I'm surprised you even found it." He stood up and walked around his desk to look out a window. "Killing me, however, will not do you any good and will definitely reveal you as Kira. Especially since we are surrounded by children with minds almost as elite as L's." Ryuk cackled from across the room and Light realized he was eying some apples on the desk. "However, Light, I cannot allow you to know where L is, even if I knew his exact whereabouts."

"Wata... Mr. Wammy, I need to know!" He didn't say why. Quillsh Wammy wouldn't care about his life being in danger and probably didn't think L would kill him. He came up with something on the fly. "He deserves the police department an explanation!"

Watari looked onto him with old eyes. "Light, you are Kira. You wish to kill L, who is like one of my many children. Why would I give you the chance to kill him when he obviously is trying to avoid killing either of you? You're just warmongering now." His eyes somehow became more intense. "However, you have not murdered anyone in the last three days.

That's right, I usually do so at night now and I haven't since I decided to come to England...

"Have you given it up? Or are you just preoccupied. Ever since L left, you have killed less and only ones with massive charges against them. If this continues, why should I lead you to him? He's being more productive away from you." Somehow, that stung the young Japanese man and it only got worst as the old man continued. "L obviously does not wish to see you." Pain. "Given the situation, he certainly does not and will never trust you." Stomach twisting. "You cannot repair what you have done, the sins you have committed." Truth. "And therefor, L's only desire is to bring justice upon you." Sadness. "Which will ultimately lead to your death." Light stopped, or at least he would have if he had been doing anything. His brain stopped and he was overcome with one emotion. It was the most ridiculous given the situation.

He felt betrayed.

"He only doesn't want to be by his hand. He wants to do it the right way, using justice and not homicide." But these words seemed to just be lost and unimportant. Light tried very much tried to keep his mind and face composed but he was wavering.

One last try. "Watari, do you have contact with L?"

"If I so choose."

"Can you call him once I leave?"

"I most likely will."

"Tell him something for me?"

Watari looked all over in his mind as to what he could say that would swing in Light's favor, however he decided if it came out to be obvious to him, he wouldn't relay the information. "I can."

"The question was only fuel. The answer is irrelevant. The outcome would be identical. Leaving things unfinished is immature - even for us." His eyes hadn't blinked in a long time so he slowly closed his eyes and sighed.

"Is that all?" Light nodded. "Very well, I will tell him." Light walked out the door without another word.

What did I just say? I was obviously talking about the gender issue - but did I just say that I want to have sex with him (her?) either way? Furthermore... Did I come all the way here just for sex? Watari had kept calling L a man even after giving his own real name. Does that answer my question? Should I go home?

He had been driving and ended up in a city, he wasn't sure where, and gotten a hotel. It had been around three hours since he left Wammy's House. He was in his room. He might as well pass judgement since he hadn't in awhile. He opened his laptop. A message was in his inbox. Wondering what his father wanted, he opened it. It wasn't from his father, it was from L.

Fuel burns out. The answer is unattainable. The outcome is indeed identical. Leaving things unfinished is just our style. Risking everything is below us.

Kira glared at the screen. He himself typed back deciding that L obviously wanted to speak in short. A game of wits almost - trying to say as much in less than a paragraph as needed to prove your point. He was hesitant, there was so much he wanted to say yet he himself wasn't sure what those things were. He erased the message in the reply and started his own.

My fire's been blown out. Sore losers don't give up hope so easily. The outcome rests in your hands. We never leave anything alone until it is concluded. Risking everything is what we've always done. With that, he crawled ino bed. He was anxious for L's answer but forced himself to try and sleep. However, it was midnight six hours later and he hadn't gotten a wink. He resigned himself to looking back at the screen.

The detective has the upper hand. And without thinking, Light started a new email and typed it and sent it. He had totally been out of his mind, obviously, when he done so. What have I done? Was that a confession? A confession of what? It could be taken all sorts of ways! Angrily he fisted his own hair, pulling tightly until his head hurt. He reflected on it so much that he fell asleep in that chair, lightly sleeping with his laptop as a pillow.

You always did.

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Fufa's Notes:

Ack! Long time no see! Sorry! I've been working hard (or hardly working). I cut my finger. I don't know if I did that before last time. Made it difficult to write. Also, I've started some new projects for myself. :D This one is all Light (Raito) and I kind of hate it. It's so OOC a lot of the time, especially Wammy. D: It's all for the greater good. I think.