Eden

~*~


Losing; the New Winning


Summary: Loyalty falters.


Disclaimer: I don't own Yami no Matsuei, nor do I have anything to do with it. Mm-mm. I wish I did, though. Cause then maybe I'd have more pictures of Muraki in my folders...

~*~


He drowns in his dreams
An exquisite extreme, I know
He's as damned as he seems
But more Heaven than a heart could hold

And if I try to save him
My whole world would cave in
It just ain't right
Lord, it just ain't right


~*~


"Stop making excuses, Tsuzuki!"

Hisoka had jumped right down his throat not two seconds after Tsuzuki had returned to their room.

"Hisoka-"

Tsuzuki hadn't gotten a word in edgewise. Hisoka was hyped on caffeine and positively livid.

"I want to know where you keep going, and I want to know now!"

"Well, you won't-"

"Don't! Don't beat around the bush!" Hisoka was starting to sound like a jealous housewife. "I know you're not out there investigating like you say you are," he pointed in the direction of the bolted door.

"I'm not that stupid... You'd let me go with you if you were looking into this ghost woman business. So where are you always running off to?!"

Tsuzuki stared at him, aghast. Maybe it wasn't the fact that he was just found out that was shocking him. It was Hisoka, in all his caffeine-disoriented glory. He didn't sound like himself, that was for sure. It was more than a little frightening, and Tsuzuki's silence only provoked Hisoka to rant again.

"Don't looik at me like that!" the teenager darted forward, grabbed Tsuzuki's shoulders and gave him a good shake. "Where have you been going, and tell me the truth! As your partner, I'm demanding that you tell me!"

"... I..." Amethyst eyes darted away, as not to look the boy in the face. "Muraki..."

Breath hitched in Hisoka's throat at the very mention of the man. He stepped back. "Muraki?" I don't understand...

Tsuzuki heaved a sigh, tugged at his tie in a lame attempt to choke himself, realized it wasn't going to happen and sighed again. He supposed the only thing to do was... vent. "The other night, he approached me with a proposition; one game of poker."

Hisoka raised an eyebrow.

Tsuzuki cringed.

"If I won, he'd give me the information he had on the ghost." Shit. I never did try to get that information from him, either... "And if I lost..." Tsuzuki shook his head. "I'd have to sleep with him."

Hisoka growled at the very prospect. "Bastard..."

The brunette shut his eyes and dropped back to the wall.

"Tsuzuki," Hisoka muttered as he stepped forward. "Tell me that you won."

"I..." he had to force the word out, "... lost."

Hisoka went white and recoiled on the spot. "Ts- Tsuzuki..."

The elder shinigami held out his hand as a shushing gesture. "I accepted defeat, but... I..." His arms crossed defensively. "I don't know what happened..."

Green eyes were glazed, and he stared in Tsuzuki's direction almost blankly. Something in his head just. Barely. Clicked.

"... Where were you tonight?"

Tsuzuki fell silent.

"Tsuzuki... Where were you?"

Hazy eyes of violet pried open and he caught the younger boy's gaze again. "With Muraki."

Another blow to Hisoka's heavy mind and he took a few more steps back. Any further and he'd run straight into the chest of drawers. "Why...?"

Tsuzuki held himself steady, took a breath, and answered sincerely, albeit hesitantly, "Because I... wanted to."

Hisoka's back did indeed collide with the furniture with a thump. His heart stalled. His mind raced. "You're... my partner... My friend..." His voice shook. "And you're running around... having some midnight rendezvouz with my fucking killer?!"

And there was his anger again. Tsuzuki had no choice but to look away. His worst fears were being realized. At least some of his worst fears. He could hear Hisoka yelling, but he couldn't decipher the words. All he heard was gibberish; like he was a puppy just learning what his master meant when he shouted, "no!"

"Hisoka, I..." he managed between the teenager's sudden gasp for air. "I'm sorry..."

"You're sorry..." Hisoka growled on his trek to the door. "No, I'm sorry, Tsuzuki. Sorry I thought for even a second that I could trust your unreliable ass..."

He reached for the door and turned it, but Tsuzuki's strong hand on the door prevented him from escaping. "I've heard you enough for one night. Now you get to hear me."

The outraged teen glared coldly up in the brunette's direction. "I don't want to hear-"

"Well, you're going to!" Tsuzuki declared while he bolted the door again and shoved the boy back from the doorway a little more.

"I understand what he's done to you, Hisoka. He's messed with me, too."

"Ya think..."

"But," Tsuzuki growled, "I've seen a side of him that you could never get close to."

Hisoka thought he'd wake up now. With that sentence, he could've sworn that this was just some horrible dream that he'd be snapping out of any minute. Any second. Any second now... There was a sternness behind Tsuzuki's voice that he wasn't accustomed to. Tsuzuki was usually laid-back, but utterly serious at work. Serious, he could handle. But this tone was defensive. And it wasn't himself he was defending.

"He's crazy, alright? At least in what he does... I understand that. Just as well as you do, I understand that. But I..." his voice faltered, for only a second. During that second, he could clearly remember how tender the doctor had been with him. He'd put aside his madman mask and shown Tsuzuki his soft side; the side that could be a perfect gentleman without question. "I don't know how to say it. Your real side surfaces when you're actually... when you're actually in love."

Emerald eyes screwed shut and Hisoka's shoulders fought not to tremble. "Well... Here's my real side..." A mere second passed before the back of Hisoka's hand came in collision with Tsuzuki's face. The smacking sound that resounded was enough to send Tsuzuki stumbling back a little, holding his cheek. His mouth was agape, if only slightly.

"Hisoka..."

"Get this through your head, you moron," Hisoka snapped as he switched the lock's direction again. "If you wanna give yourself over to that psychopath every night, by all means, do. Just remember how he operates."

Tsuzuki felt a catch in his throat.

"He's a spider; he lures in his prey with his charm and well-strung words. Let him keep talking and you'll just get tangled in his web. So don't come crying to me when he eats you alive."

Tsuzuki could only listen to the slam of the door behind the teenager's retreating form. Each word was lingering like an odor in the air and each word stung just as badly as the one before. He did have a point. That was how Kazutaka Muraki preyed on his victims. No, but he was different. Tsuzuki was different. Muraki had made that clear.

But... what if that's part of his plan...?

He clutched at the side of his head and dropped down against the edge of the bed.

"Muraki..."


~*~


I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
He's such a beautiful disaster...

And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster...?


~*~


Afternote: I credit the idea for Tsuzuki defending my dear Muraki to Jollyolly. =)


Review. And stuff. Yeah. More to come! ^^