Inevitable

Disclaimer: Hellsing belongs to Kohta Hirano, not to me. No copyright infringement is intended or implied.

Note: I\'d like to think dasaod for outstanding beta work. Any mistakes are my own.


Inevitable

Alexander Andersong was not a completely changed man yet. He had accepted a room in Hellsing manor, and inevitably the authority of Sir Integral Hellsing. Still, he had not been tamed, nor did he run free. Rumors had reached him that he had been defrocked but with London in turmoil he had not been able to confirm that. Nor did he feel the need to, he had known his life as a priest was over when he had shattered the glass around his archbishop.

But if he was not a priest, what was he? He could hardly remember being simply a man. Alexander was a regenerator and a warrior for God, though he no longer served the church and was not yet ready to dedicate the rest of his life to serving Hellsing.

If he was not a man, was he then a monster? He knew monsters; he had killed them. But the fact that his flesh regenerated, the fact that he could be overcome with a desire to shed the blood of his enemies -- surely that did not mean he was just like one of them?

He thought, inevitably, of Alucard. Now that Alexander no longer fought him, no longer let rage consume him whenever the vampire was near, did that make them more alike? It was a hateful thought, but one that he could not entirely push out of his mind.

There was a lull in the fighting currently, but Hellsing manor was still a place of tension. No one knew when the next Millennium attack might come. Integral was gathering her shattered forces around her. But on this night she was taking a moment to sit down to dinner.

It was an odd sort of domestic scene. The current captain of the Wild Geese, promoted when Pip Bernadette was believed dead, was the other regular human in attendance. Seras Victoria had been excused on the grounds that she, or they perhaps, did not eat. Alucard should have been excused for the same reason, but he sat by his master\'s side, staring at everyone in turn and toying with an empty wineglass.

Integral Hellsing was a beautiful woman, sitting still for one short hour with the light shining though her hair. There was a determined look to her even as she ate that Anderson could not help but appreciate. She seemed born to fight in a way he had seldom seen in anyone, male or female.

Yet more and more he found his eyes drawn toward Alucard. He told himself that it was for the sake of being on guard and wary, even though Integral had forbidden them to fight. But really he knew there was more to it than that. There was something fascinating about this creature who had been a horrifying man and a vampire count, a striking presence even beyond his predatory nature.

At one point Alucard looked back at him and winked, raising his glass in the priest\'s direction. Alexander felt a tightening in his chest and a rush through his system. These sensations were familiar to him, and could not be ascribed to fear or anger. But they were wrong, especially when they were caused by this old and powerful monster.

Sir Integral smiled at Alexander but it did not help him block out these reactions. The new Captain spoke to him but it did not distract him at all. His eyes were drawn back to the vampire, to the red eyes burning in the pale skin, to the fangs proudly bared as Alucard laughed.

Alexander told himself that he hated him, and that he should not let that hatred dull simply because he could not kill him. He told himself to concentrate on how horrifying it was to share a table with the beast. But his repulsion was mixed with something else that the priest refused to call by its name. Suddenly he felt tired, and disgusted with himself. He threw his napkin on the table and left without speaking. Integral called after him but even then he did not turn around.

He stalked through the front door of the Manor and began to walk the grounds. He paid no attention to the darkness or to the inquiring looks of the guards. He reached a spot near a corner of the building and leaned against it, murmuring a Latin prayer to himself.

\"This is an evil place after all,\" he thought. \"And now it has infected me.\"

He wondered if he could still leave, but dismissed the idea. He had cast his lot with Integral Hellsing and he would see that commitment through. Someday, on earth or in heaven, he would be asked to account for his actions, and he would point to that woman and her war as his explanation.

Still leaning against the wall, he thought of Alucard, and of the fact that some things could never be excused. Just then he saw the vampire himself approach. He stopped in front of him, smiling imperturbably.

\"You were very rude to leave my master\'s table without asking permission,\" said Alucard.

\"I was never a count,\" he replied. \"I can\'t claim perfect manners. Did you come all the way out here to scold me like a child?\"

\"Not precisely.\" Alucard reached out and put his finger on Andersong\'s shoulder, drawing a line down his arm.

\"Don\'t touch me,\" the priest replied.

\"But you want me to touch you,\" said the vampire. And when he said it, Andersong knew it was true. Probably one didn\'t even have to read minds to know. He closed his eyes for a moment.

\"What is it like,\" said Alucard in his smooth voice, \"to know someone that you can\'t kill. That you could grapple with forever and perhaps never destroy. It\'s rather stimulating, isn\'t it?\"

Now he put his gloved hand on Andersong\'s chin, and the priest opened his eyes. \"You\'re a loathsome creature,\" he said to the vampire.

\"Oh, we both are, I suppose. But we serve the same master now. Come inside with me.\"

\"I don\'t know what you have planned,\" began Andersong.

Alucard cut him off. \"I think you do know. And I think you will come inside with me now.\"

Hating himself, Andersong followed him inside, where Alucard led him to a small room with only a desk and a bed.

\"This isn\'t your room. You don\'t need a bed at all,\" said the priest.

\"I don\'t know whose room it is. So we\'d better be quick,\" said Alucard with a grin.

He walked forward until Andersong had his back to the wall. His hands ached for the feel of his blades. What had happened to him, that he wasn\'t trying to kill Alucard? That he was letting him near, letting something forbidden seem instead inevitable?

\"You\'d like to cut me right now, wouldn\'t you?\" the vampire said. He finally moved forward and pressed his body against Andersong\'s.

\"You can\'t read my mind,\" snapped the priest. His body was reacting strongly to this contact. Andersong didn\'t like that, he had little enough control over his body as a regenerator. Now his heart was pounding and he felt a feeling like fear. But he hadn\'t felt fear in a long time, and this feeling made him press closer to Alucard rather than run away.

\"I know a great deal without even reading minds.\" Alucard reached boldly under Alex\'s coat and began to run his hand up his inner thigh. Andersong was instantly hard, and stood stock still as Alucard touched him through his clothes.

\"What do you think I\'m going to let you do, monster?\" he said, knowing it was not rhetoric but a real question.

\"We\'ll see,\" said Alucard, grasping him harder.

Andersong was starting to ache, wanting release, yet dreading the thought of Alucard seeing him even weaker. Suddenly he made a decision and tore the vampire\'s pants open. Alucard was also aroused, and the priest grabbed Alucard\'s erection in his gloved hand.

\"So fast already,\" muttered Alucard. He then drew away, and began to push Andersong down on the bed while unfastening and lowering his pants. Andersong didn\'t even struggle; the time for that had passed.

\"You will not penetrate me,\" said Andersong. Though he had let himself be bedded by a monster he was not yet desperate, he thought to himself. He could still draw a line somewhere.

Alucard shook his head, and began stroking Andersong\'s sac with small strokes of his gloved fingers. The priest closed his eyes as Alucard teased him, his excitement and frustration growing. Suddenly he felt the vampire\'s long tongue on him also. That wet touch, surprisingly warm, felt even better, but he didn\'t want Alucard\'s mouth so near him.

He moved to sit up, and opened his eyes. Alucard shook his head, gestured to him to stay where he was, and moved to lie on top of him. Again he noticed that the vampire was not cold. In spite of everything, the feel of his skin was pleasurable. Tje priest could feel Alucard\'s shaft next to his, and then Alucard began to move.

He had been taught to fear sex, and now it had taken over his body. The friction was pleasurable and fulfilling, and he didn\'t even consider ending it. He lay there as Alucard pushed against him, and finally began pushing back himself, wondering what Alucard was thinking of this, and of him.

He could feel fluid leaking from his tip as he neared his peak, and Alucard put his hand between them to spread it over both their erections, increasing the ease of their rubbing. Andersong wanted to end this, and he thrust hard against Alucard\'s skin and came. The feeling was an overwhelming relief. But they weren\'t finished. The vampire looked down at him with a grin and rocked a few more times before he finally spilled his own seed on the priest\'s body.

Andersong didn\'t want to think about where he was and what had just happened. As Alucard got up, he still lay with his eyes closed.

\"You\'d best wipe yourself up,\" the vampire said. \"Unless you want the person who sleeps here to return and find you half naked and covered in my semen.\"

Andersong made a disgusted noise and wiped himself with his shirttail. He got up and pulled his pants on, then walked through the door.

\"This will never happen again,\" he said to Alucard. He wasn\'t sure he meant it, because the fascination and lust might pull him in again in the end.

Alucard laughed. \"Well it\'s never the same way twice, you know.\"

\"I don\'t know!\" Andersong yelled. \"I don\'t do this.\"

\"Except with me.\"

Andersong went through the door and walked down the hall alone. He had turned his back on an enemy, which was always a mistake, but that was nothing compared to the other events of the night. All he wanted now was his own bed, his own thoughts, and the safety of familiar Latin words. He still hated Alucard, and he still wanted him, and all the holiness he could think of didn\'t seem enough to cleanse his sin.