Minds Racing

Minds Racing...


MATT’S THOUGHTS

I lay on my bed, watching him from afar. I wonder what he is thinking. I’m always happy when I’m with him. I wonder if he feels the same way. Sometimes, I don’t think he feels the same way towards me. I will always protect him, no matter if my life is on the line. Me and Gabumon have been living with each other since our last battle in the digital world last summer. Now it’s one year later and today is my last day of school. I have Geometry homework but I can’t concentrate. I just keep thinking: thinking of what will happen if I lose him. He catches me staring at him. “Matt, you ok?” “Huh?! Wha….. Yeah I’m fine. Sorry bout that, Gabumon. I was just thinking about a History question.” “Yeah, but your doing Geometry.” I got worried. I blushed. “Matt, what were you really thinking. I’m your best friend. I won’t tell anyone, you know that.” “I know, Gabumon. It’s just that…….that…” I start to build up tears in my eyes. There’s nothing I can do to stop my feelings now. “Matt what’s wrong?” Gabumon has his worried look with concern on his face. “Matt please tell me.” I can’t take it anymore. That face of his, his body, his way of talking, thinking, loving, and knowing me. I throw myself on him, both of us going on the floor. Gabumon is shocked at first, trying to throw me off but soon realizes that I am crying my heart out. “Gabumon, I’m so glad you’re my digimon! I’m not good enough for you. I don’t deserve you. After all the things I’ve done to you, you still have the courage and friendship to forgive me! I lo……” I stop myself. I roll off of Gabumon to let him get up. He is still in shock, I can tell. “Gabumon, I’m so sorry that I tackled you but…” He interrupts me but I don’t mind “No Matt. It’s not that. I’m just happy that you feel this way towards me. Because honestly, I really haven’t had anyone tell me the things you told me to me just now.” I start to cry again but I fight it back this time. I try to change the subject, trying not to sound nervous. “We….Well I’m going to bed. You better come too. You look tired.” “Yeah, I guess your right, Matt. Let’s go!” He gives me his sweet smile again. I can’t help but smile back. At this point, I have all these emotions mixing in my gut. Love, passion, nervousness, happiness, anger, sadness. I go into my bathroom and change into my pajamas. When I return into my bed, Gabumon is already stripped down to nothing and in bed, sleeping soundly. This makes me feel even worse. I want to tell him how I really feel, what my gut says but I’m afraid. I know that he doesn’t feel the same way towards me. I get into bed, careful not to wake him. Then I get under the covers and get to sleep.
I wake up around 6:30. School starts at 7:40. I look over to my left to meet Gabumon. He is still sleeping. He is so peaceful, so sweet, and yet, so brave while he sleeps. He starts to wake up. He opens his big water blue eyes. “Hi, Gabumon. How did you sleep?” He yawned. He is so cute. “I slept pretty well. Thanks for asking.” I just want to stay in bed like this forever, but I can’t. “Well, I’m going to take a shower, Gabumon. I’ll be right back.” “Ok, Matt. I won’t leave you.” He looked up at me with concern, bravery, honesty, and I thought love.


GABUMON’S THOUGHTS

We get up, talk and he goes to school. It’s the same old, same old. I wish I can tell him the way I really feel. I felt so loved for what he did last night when he jumped on me. I wish I could tell him then but I was scared; scared that he doesn’t feel the same way. I can’t love him. What am I thinking? I’m a digimon, and he’s a human. But he is so peaceful, loving, caring, and most of all friendly and honest. I’m glad today is his last day of school. He gets out of the shower. I can tell because he turned off the water. He comes out of the bathroom into his room to find clothes. This is the closest part I get to see him next to nudity. One part of me wants to rip off the towel and another part wants to be nice and keep it on. Matt goes back into the bathroom to change, put on cologne, you know, the usual. When he comes out, he looks so handsome in his faded blue jeans, ribbed collar v-neck blue t-shirt with a white one underneath. “Matt, do you mind that I use your bathroom to take a bath? I won’t be long, I promise.” “Sure thing, buddy.” His book bag is right next to me. When he leans down to get it, our faces are so close, I can feel his breath on my furry cheek. Then he does the thing I never would have expected. He kisses my muzzled nose ever so slightly but enough to where I can feel it. He leaves his lips on my nose for quite a while. Then he quickly backs away, and flings his book bag on his shoulder. “Umm…… he he he…… I go……gotta go, Gabumon. See ya!” He hurries out the door. I try to stop him but he is already out the door going out to the sidewalk. I stand there, stunned. He has never done that before, ever, but I loved it. The feel of his wet, loving lips almost on my lips. Just the thought of it makes me shiver. Oh, I want him so bad. I want him to know that I love him and not just as a friend love but love as in relationship, I want him in me love. I never thought I was gay or even bi. I doubt it if he is gay or even bi at that. I guess I’ll have to wait and see……

CH. 2

MATT’S THOUGHTS

I can’t think, but it’s only the last day. Our big exam is today, but I’m not thinking about that. I’m thinking about him. Him who will always be there for me but I’m the one whose afraid of telling him. I stare out the window, waiting for school to end. I’m waiting to see him. Waiting to bust out of this school and run into his arms and……. “Matt, why aren’t you doing your exam?” “Huh……wha…..oh sorry Miss Tangent. I was just thinking.” Whew. That was close. I just can’t concentrate. I can’t believe what I did this morning. He probably hates me. The seventh period bell rings. I’m caught off guard. I don’t even have my stuff ready. I finally gather my stuff and head off to eighth period. On the way I stop to see some of my friend, or so I thought he was my friend. “Hey man. What’s going on?” “Matt, shut the hell up! We know your secret. We know how you keep your digimon with you. Why don’t you put it back to the digital world and forget about that thing?” “Shut up man, he’s a friend. He was always there for me and I want him to be with me. He’s like family.” The next thing I know, I’m pinned to the locker. I wanted to scream for help but I was afraid that I would also get in trouble. “You listen up, Matt. You get rid of that thing of what you call a friend or I’ll get rid of you!” “You can kiss my a…” I got B-slapped across the face. Wrong thing to say. “Right after school, Matt. By the back-way doors.” Shit, that’s the door I have to go out to get to my house. Finally the bell rings for eighth period. He shoves me off the wall and on to the floor violently. “Just be there, jackass.” This was my friend. My best friend at that. Now I have no friends besides Gabumon. I walk into eighth period. My teacher just glares at me, telling me with his mind to sit down. It was Mr. Guily. I’ve always hated him because he’s always hated me for really no particular reason. Luckily, this class is just study hall. I get out a piece of paper and start to doodle. I start to draw Gabumon. I get lost in my drawing. I start with his face: his loving, caressing smile, his sweet muzzle that always shows bravery, his big, water pools of eyes that I would love to look into forever, and finally his ears. Yes, his ears. I love the way they stick up, like two lightning bolts of love. I move on to the rest of his body: his muscular, smooth hair arms, his sexy, silk soft legs, and his feet, oh his feet. I would love to caress his feet and massage them with my hands and my tongue. My masterpiece is finally done. Time must of went by long because the bell rung and like before, I wasn’t even ready. My thought of my drawing was all lost and I came back to after school. I slowly get all my stuff and head for my locker, which is right by the back-side doors. I get my book bag and put my binder in it. I get my drawing and shove it partly into my pocket. I start to go out the door as fast as I can, hoping my “friend” won’t be there. I ease open the door and peek out. He doesn’t seem to be there. I hurriedly walk out the door. To my luck, he is standing by the dumpster beside the door. He stands there, smiling evilly. He waits until almost everyone is gone to come up to me. My heart is in my throat. He finally comes up to me and slams a punch onto my face. I’m so stunned at the blow, I fall back onto the ground. He jumps on top of me and just starts pulverizing my face to shreds. I try to fight back but I’m useless. All I can do is block my face. My drawing accidentally comes out of my pocket. He picks it up, looks at it and laughs. “Man, you must be in love! Ha! I never would have guessed but that’s just pathetic. A human in love with his digimon. GROW UP MATT!” He starts to punch me again but luckily, a teacher comes from behind and pulls him off of me. “Gary, what were you doing?” I’m sorry Mr. Guily. He tried to hit me first.” “What!? Mr. Guily, I did no such thing!” “I know Matt. You go on ahead and go home, Matt. Gary! You come with me!” I was saved by a teacher that I thought didn’t like me but I guess I was wrong. I put my hand up to my face and feel around. I’m bleeding right above my right eye and below my lower lip. It’s pretty bad. I hurry home, hoping that Gabumon won’t be there as soon as I walk in so I can at least try to clean up, but that didn’t happen. Almost as soon as I walk into the door, he comes down the stairs. “Hi, Matt. Why are your clothes all dirty? O my god, Matt! What happened! What did you do? Who did this to you?” “I just fell, Gabumon. It’s nothing.” I hurry upstairs but Gabumon is right behind me, still trying to make me tell him what really happened. “Matt, just tell me what….” “I TOLD YOU! I JUST FELL! PLEASE STOP BUGGING ME! GOD!” I just realized what I’ve done. Were already in my room. He sits on my bed, tears filling his eyes. I put my book bag in my closet, trying not to make eye contact with him. I know that he’s watching me, giving me a look of why. Why did you do this towards me? I’m just trying to help. He’s saying this in his mind. I know it. I can feel it…….


GABUMON’S THOUGHTS

Why did he yell at me? I’m starting to think that he doesn’t love me, nor want to be my friend or tamer anymore. I hope he’s not sick of me. I just want him to tell the truth. He finally turns around and looks at me. “Matt, please, just tell me what happened.” He sits on his bed, head hanging down low. A deep black aura starts to form around his body. I start to get scared. “Matt!?....... Matt what’s wrong!?......” “Just leave me alone, Gabumon. No one loves me……. I can see that now; not you, my mom, my dad, or anyone else….” “That’s not true, Matt! You know your parents love you and you should defiantly know I love you!” “Gabumon, don’t say those things when they’re not true.” MATT, STOP IT! YOU’RE SCARIN ME!” “Just go away Gabumon…..” He trails off, lost in his deep depression. I only have one thing in mind. I lean over and bite his leg. “OWW! What was that for!?” “Matt, just listen to me……. You shouldn’t say those things. They’re not true…….and…… if you really want me to go……. Then I will.” I start to build tears in my eyes. “No Gabumon, don’t leave. It’s just that……… I’ve never been this close to anyone like this and I’ve always been taught to not cry…….. but in all honestly…….. that’s all I’ve wanted to do……. is just cry. Ever since my parents left me, that’s all I have wanted to do.” “Then cry Matt. If that’s all you wanted to do, then just cry!”

NARRATOR

Then, Matt starts to cry. He feels so miserable, so helpless. Gabumon takes him down to the floor. Matt went onto his knees and buried his face into Gabumon’s fur and starts to bawl. Gabumon strokes Matt’s silky brown hair. “Matt, I will always be there for you, know matter what. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, come to me. I will be there. I will never leave you.” “Oh Gabumon……. I feel so worthless…….I only get through life because of you. You’re my only reason for living. My mom or my dad have never been as close as you have.” “Matt, you should know how much I love you. I would never depart you in any way. I will always love you and I will always be your friend.” Matt pulls apart from their grasp. “Do…………do you mean that, Gabumon?” Matt starts to build more tears in his eyes now. Gabumon only answers by leaning over and kissing Matt very passionately and fully on the lips. They kiss for what seems like an eternity. Finally Gabumon pulls apart and smiles. Matt is dumbfounded but also very happy. He realizes that someone does love him, and it’s Gabumon. “Oh Gabumon, I’m so sorry for the way I acted to you. It’s just that…….. that…….. I…….. love you…..” Gabumon’s mind is racing now. His mind plays those words over and over again; I love you, I love you, I love you…….. Gabumon didn’t even know that Matt had the same feelings for him but he was wrong; he does……

OOOHHH cliff-hanger…. I’ll finish this one when I get time…. For now BYE BYE!!!

DigimonDudeBC