A Greater Need

Title: A Greater Need
Pairing: BanxGinji
Summary: Out of the limitless fortress and back to the Honky Tonk. Everything seems to be back to normal, until Ban notices an unusual change in his partner.
Warnings: Shounen-ai, a ton of angst, and slightl spoilers if you haven\'t seen all the MakubeX episodes- but nothing too big.
Disclaimer: Do not own Getbackers or any of it\'s characters.

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It was raining again, just like it was last night. Only the two recovery agents weren’t walking down long and seemingly never ending hallways of the limitless fortress. Both young men were seated at the counter inside the Honky Tonk. A clock that was on the wall ticking away, but the silence that filled the café made it seem louder than usual. It was almost 10 o’clock; almost closing time.

Ban’s cerulean blue eyes shifted to the left of him, looking at his friend, then glancing down at the four untouched sandwiches and a half empty cup of coffee. The steam no longer rising from the medium sized white ceramic cup.

Something was wrong. Usually Ginji would have downed his food and coffee in less than five minutes. And yet he was sitting somewhat slouched over the counter, staring at his food as if it wasn’t even there.

Ban lifted his gaze to Ginji’s face again, a distant look plastered on the blonde’s features. Brown eyes filled to the brim with something Ban was unaccustomed to. Even though Ban was used to his work partner’s eyes being almost constantly full of emotion, this was different. Ginji seemed almost unreadable. And Ban didn’t like it.

The more stoic of the two glanced behind the counter to see Paul reading his newspaper for almost the third time that day. The glint of light in his small round sunglasses telling Ban that every time Paul looked up from his newspaper, his eyes were looking in Ginji’s direction. Ban then glanced over to a rather tired looking Natsumi, drying off his coffee cup that she had already cleaned a short while ago. The dark haired girl would occasionally look over at Ginji. A concerned look on her pretty face every time she saw that those four sandwiches she had made for Ginji were still untouched after almost an hour.

Ban bit down slightly on the unlit cigarette in his mouth. The silence almost getting to be too much, even for him.

“So are you going to tell us what’s wrong? Or are you going to continue staring a hole through your food?” Ban said, not turning his head to face Ginji, but his eyes on him from a side angle.

To everyone’s surprise, Ginji didn’t respond. Just continued to look down, lowering his head further, his blonde spikes obscuring his eyes from everyone’s view.

Natsumi took Ban’s words as an opening and finally perked up.

“Ban’s right, Mr. Ginji. You haven’t touched your food yet. Is there something wrong with it?” she asked, her soft voice full of concern, her right hand clutching the front of her apron.

Nothing could be heard but the slight rustle of Paul’s newspaper as he lowered it ever so slightly to peer over it at Ginji. Then bringing it up again by a hair’s breath.

Ban continued to watch his friend from the corner of his eye, and noticing Natsumi looking more and more worried as Ginji didn’t respond.

Finally after a few moments of more torturous silence, Ginji lifted his head, a big smile on his face, directed towards the young girl.

“Well of course there’s nothing wrong with the sandwiches you make, Miss Natsumi!” Ginji said enthusiastically as he proceeded to swallow all four sandwiches whole.

Natsumi smiled and laughed, seeming relieved at Ginji’s usual goofy behavior.

But it didn’t fool Ban for one second.

He turned his head to Ginji, the now supposingly happy and cheerful recovery agent having his back to him. Delighting in the food he had just devoured.

“So you answer to Natsumi but not to me? That’s pretty rude, Ginji. Doesn’t do any good for business if we can’t even communicate properly” Ban said, almost taunting his friend and work partner to speak up.

Ginji suddenly paused, his posture slacking some as he was about to turn to face Ban, but stopped. There was that deadly silence in the air again. Deciding to not cause anymore of a scene, Ginji slowly stood from the seat at the counter.

“Thanks for the sandwiches, Natsumi” Ginji said as he nodded in her direction, his voice sounding almost blank of emotion. He slowly started walking towards the door of the café and opening it, the small bell above it ringing as he walked out.

“Mr. Ginji, where are you..” Natsumi trailed off as Ginji made no attempt at answering her. She stood behind the counter and watched as the former lighting emperor walked off in the rain.

Ban looked at the door his friend just walked out of, a strange expression on his usually emotionless features.

Natsumi turned to Paul.

“What do you think is wrong with Mr. Ginji, chief?” Natsumi asked.

Paul continued to read his newspaper, then eventually answering to the teenager’s question.

“I think he’s scared of something, Natsu’”

Ban eyed Paul from behind his purple sunglasses, then looking back at the small bell above the door that was still swaying slightly. Before he could have a second thought, Ban stood from the seat and walked out of the Honky Tonk.

Natsumi watched as Ban too left, watching the rain get heavier.

“But what could Mr. Ginji be so scared of?” Natsumi asked, more to herself than to Paul.

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Ban almost ran down the street, something tugged inside him. A desperation telling him that he had to find Ginji. He thought about what Paul had said, and it seemed to make perfect sense. After the long tiring encounters inside the limitless fortress… of course it made sense.

Ban turned the corner of the street the Honky Tonk was on. Looking around in the increasing rainfall.

“Damn that idiot, where is he?!” Ban cussed to himself.

He almost jumped out of his skin as he heard something move behind him. He whipped his head around to see a near-drenched Ginji, his back to a concrete wall.

Ban almost breathed a sigh of relief.

“There you are…” was all Ban could say. He knew Ginji had purposely waited in his spot for him to come. Not wanting to involve Natsumi or even Paul with the matter. Ban waited patiently for Ginji to speak.

Ginji looked down at the puddles around him, shivering as the rainwater dripped through his hair; staining his clothes.

“I almost lost myself in there, Ban” Ginji said quietly.

Ban just stared at his shorter friend, not saying anything as he knew Ginji had more to say.

“That place… I was never able to call it home. I was never my true self while I was there. And I came to a realization those few days ago, and it’s why I’ve been acting a little weird today…” Ginji paused before he continued, lifting his gaze to meet Ban’s.

Ban’s eyes widened slightly as he saw tears in the corners of Ginji’s.

“When you appeared before me and Akabane, it felt as if I was waking up from a dream, only to find myself in a nightmare. I had no idea what was going on, the only knowledge I had in that instant was that you were dead. In those few moments before I heard you speak, I didn’t have anything left. Not even the energy to try and kill Akabane for what he had done. I had nothing, Ban!!” Ginji yelled at his partner.

Ban wasn’t startled however, but inside his thoughts were reeling. An invisible force squeezing his heart, feeling like it would burst any moment.

“While we were in the limitless fortress, I realized that you are the only person in this world who can stop this terrible power in me. And that without you… I return to nothingness.”

Ban sighed silently, closing his eyes for a moment to realize the truth of what Ginji had said.

“I know I cling onto you a lot. That I act as if you’re all that matters, and that I need you to be around me constantly or else I’ll lose my mind. But the truth of the matter is… I do need you, Ban. I cannot afford to let myself turn into the lightening emperor again, or else I’ll lose myself completely. I- I don’t want to hurt people, Ban. I-“

“You realized you need me that much more, huh?” Ban interrupted, causing Ginji to look up in shock at his closest friend. Ginji didn’t know whether to nod or not. He knew Ban’s statement was true. He needed him. If something were to ever happen to Ban, Ginji’s current existence would seize. Chaos would ensue. Losing Ban would mean losing himself.

Ginji lowered his head, clutching his gloved fists at his sides, the only sound to be heard was the pounding rain.

“I… I don’t mean to be dependent on you, Ban. That’s not fair on you…” before Ginji could carry on, he found Ban right in front of him. The blonde recoverer pondered to himself just how Ban had made it this close without him hearing anything but the rain.

“Ban, I-“

“Ginji” Ban spoke firmly.

Ginji felt helpless to say anything, his back against the cold hard wall.

Ban looked into Ginji’s eyes, determined. Slowly bringing up his right hand to gently cup Ginji’s rain and tear stained face. Ginji gasped slightly, wondering just what Ban was doing.

“What have I told you countless times now? What the ‘s’ in getbackers stands for?”

Ginji relaxed some, knowing what Ban meant, but his partner reminded him anyway.

“It means, Ginji, that you never have to be alone.” Ban said softly, his voice barely audible over the harsh sound of the rainfall that increased further with every passing minute.

Ban looked down at Ginji, the cigarette that was still in his mouth being beyond repair now. Ginji hesitantly reached up and took the soaked item from Ban’s mouth, dropping it to the ground. Ban’s hand that was still cupped to the side of Ginji’s face rubbed slightly at the soft skin beneath his fingertips. The movement caused Ginji to look up at Ban again, then suddenly found his partner’s forehead pressed against his.

“God Ginji, you know I could never leave you anyway” Ban spoke just as softly as he did before.

Ginji gasped again, watching as Ban’s unique eyes moved over the features of his face, feeling himself weaken to Ban in that moment. Something was at work between them, and as they continued to just stare at each other, nothing could have stopped Ban closing the small distance between them, their lips just barely touching.

“I need you just as much, Ginji. I know I don’t show it… but I think it’s about time I did” Ban finished as he fully pressed his lips to Ginji’s.

Ginji’s eyes widened to almost the size of two tennis balls, fresh tears and rain still clinging to his dark eyelashes. The blonde felt the other kiss him again, only more insistently, causing him to snap out of the current shock that prevented him from even comprehending the moment.

Ban pulled back a mere few inches, his hand slipping behind Ginji’s head, sinking into wet blonde spikes. He stared down at Ginji, his eyes no longer bulging out of his head, rather they returned to their usual soft gaze.

“Now, shall we get out of this rain?” Ban asked, his voice almost returning to normal, but still a slight softness to it.

Ginji lifted his head up, staring at Ban for a moment before nodding silently, a smile on his lips.

Ban took his hand away from Ginji’s head, stepping back out of his friends personal space and started walking along the footpath. Ginji just watched as Ban walked off slowly, his heart beat still beating rather fast from the encounter that took place between the two of them.

The more and more Ginji just watched Ban walk away, the more he felt that same sadness inside him whenever Ban wasn’t around.

Ginji peeled himself off the wall, starting to walk hurriedly to catch up with Ban, then soon started running. Once Ginji was walking beside Ban, both walking at the same speed, Ginji smiled to himself, tears almost filling his eyes again. Even though they were both drenched with rain, shivering cold, knowing they weren’t going to a flash house or apartment to spend the night, but rather to Ban’s subaru bug- Ginji had never felt happier. He needed Ban, and he had him. He no longer felt hindered by his emotions, worrying about what Ban would think about his inner demons and desperation’s. He could honesty say that he could trust Ban with his life, with anything. Every negative thought that ever drifted into Ginji’s mind disappeared when Ban was around. He was like a flash of the brightest light, shunning away the dark thoughts that sometimes often consumed his thoughts.

Ban was right; Ginji did need him more than he first thought. But no longer felt weighed down by the thought, for he had him. And by the special bond they shared, he always would have him.