I'll Try

Title: I'll Try
Anime: Haru wo Daite Ita
Rating: Mature (for male on male incest lemon)


I'll Try


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Author's Note: Oh my gosh, shortly after I posted this tale, that same plotbunny that gave it to me beat me about the head and shoulders with this one important little fact that I apparently forgotten:

There is no way in hell that Nagisa Sawa would allow anyone, not even his dearest love and probably not even his parents (but we don't really know that, do we?), to call him “Tsueno”. Nothing would kill the mood for this particular scene like calling the one you're about to top “Always Male”.

So, yes, major finding and replacing happened, and here's the revised version for your enjoyment!

For those just tuning in, this takes place during the Swissland chapter.


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“If that's what you wish, I'll try,” I said, pressing our lips together. With a sigh of what I hope was relief, Nagisa opened his mouth, giving me room to slide my tongue inside to duel with his. His moan vibrated through my body as I increased the pressure, determined to take what was so freely given to me.

I was still feeling just a bit unsure. I've never taken the initiative before, and I've never shown just how badly I wanted him until we were naked and he was sliding inside me. He's always been so patient, showing me so much caring and passion whenever we made love. Now I had to-

No, I take that back.

Now I wanted to return the favor. I wanted to take my lover.

“Are you sure, Nagisa?” I whispered against his lips.

Smirking the way he always does when he's thinking of something dirty, he leaned back from his kneel on the floor until his hands were holding him up. The proof was obvious between his spread legs.

“I know I've asked you to do some things that made you a little uneasy at first, but I know you'll enjoy this.”

I quirked an eyebrow. That's what he always says. Though most of the time, he was right and I ended up enjoying myself anyway.

“What's wrong, Yukihito? Don't you trust me?” Nagisa raised his turtleneck a bit, running his hand on the pale skin underneath. His expression was meant to be pouty, but the blood red hue on his lips turned it into something sexy and beckoning. “I've always wanted you like this. I've wanted you to touch me just like this...”

I watched his hand as it moved higher under his shirt and pause in the middle of his chest. “I imagine those soft hands of yours all over my body.” The hand slid to the left, pulling at his nipple. The soft, whine that fell from his mouth destroyed my objections. He was sure, all right.

“Nagisa.”

“Yesss?” he hissed as he toyed with the right nipple. God, seeing him enjoy himself turned me on so much.

I jerked my head in the direction of the bed I still sat on. It had to be much more comfortable than the floor he knelt on.

To my surprise, he laughed and shook his head. “Oh no you don't, love. You have to start telling me things directly, remember? Now, what do you want?”

Oh yeah, I'd nearly forgotten about that little promise I made. “I'll try to speak out more,” I had said. It's not that I refuse to speak, it's just that in the years that Nagisa and I have lived together, I didn't have to. He understood my every expression, my every gesture. I'm not sure what would be harder to do tonight, topping him or telling him what I want.

“On the bed,” I whispered, scooting back to give him room. “I want you on the bed.”

Within moments, I had Nagisa in my arms and on his back on the soft quilt. His lips caressed my neck and jaw and I slipped my hands under his shirt and touched him where he had imagined I would.

From his moans, I guessed that he was enjoying my touch. I felt inspired, like he does with his writings, and wanted to draw out more. The black turtleneck was quickly slipped off and thrown to the floor, giving me a lot more room to work with. His skin smelled faintly of whatever perfume he was wearing today and tasted like sweat, salty and unquestionably male. The combination of scents, one feminine and one quite masculine never failed to arouse me. This was, without a doubt, Nagisa in his purest form.

He urged me with his voice as I licked my way to his nipples, lapping the left first. Remembering that I licked having mine bitten, I caught it between my teeth, gently at first.

“Oh, God, yess,” he gasped. “Harder, Yukihito. That's it...”

Worrying that little nub, I batted away the hand that was pulling at its twin, replacing it with my own. After a moment, I switched places, savoring the yelp that turned into a groan that warmed me all the way to my groin. If I knew this was how he would respond to my touch, and how much I would enjoy it, I would have taken the initiative a long time ago.

I suddenly had the desire to use my mouth much lower. I wanted to hear the sounds he would make when I pleased him with my mouth. He tried to help me undo his pants but I stopped him with a glare.

“Let me do this, Nagisa.” I paused, thinking. “Or I'll find some way to keep your hands still.” I gave him a smile that I hope was taunting.

I couldn't be completely bluffing. Knowing our hosts, there had to be a pair of handcuffs around here somewhere. I hoped I wouldn't have to ask around, though I'm sure I could use some of our clothing if I absolutely had to.

Nagisa looked down at me, a blush peeking though his makeup. He looked rather surprised.

“Yukihito, how bold! Where do you get such ideas?”

I rolled my eyes. “I learned from the best.”

By this time, I had his pants opened and was pulling out his erection. Feeling its heavy warmth in my hand was all the proof I needed of his enjoyment so far. Time to show him how much I've learned from “the best”.

He opened his mouth to reply, and I took that opportunity to run my tongue from base to damp and dripping tip. Any words he may have said were lost in a shocked squawk as I repeated that motion. I could get used to that.

I've only done this to him a couple of times, but each time I learned something new and useful. Don't take it all in at once; be careful with the teeth and foreskin; stop if my jaw hurt. The basics, of course, but I also picked up a few tricks that I was sure applied only to him. And I used each one.

Once again, his cries were turning me on in the worst way, and I reached down to adjust myself in my pajama pants before it got too uncomfortable down there. As I sucked him as deep as my mouth could hold, I gazed up for a moment to see how I was affecting him.

The sight was amazing. Nagisa's eyes were closed tight, his red lips parted to make way for huge gasps of air, back arched and hands clenching the quilt. I saw in my mind's eye myself in that same position under his expert mouth and it made me very happy that I could do the same for him.

From the increase of his breath and the tightening of the testicles I was fondling, I knew he was close, and I had to get ready. Sucking him until he came was a first for me, given that I preferred him to be inside me at this point whenever we had sex.

I guess this would also count as coming inside of me, I suppose.

“Yuki-” he gasped, my only warning before my mouth was filled with shot after shot of his release. It was salty, a bit bitter and I couldn't swallow fast enough. I pulled my mouth away, coughing, flushed with both exertion and embarrassment. A pair of arms surrounded me, and a hand wiped away the mess on my chin.

“Yukihito, love, that was...interesting.” I could hear the smirk in his voice, and I blushed even more. The little giggle he made didn't help matters either, but his kiss took away most of my embarrassment.

“I'm sorry I laughed. That was so good that I'm glad you didn't stop this time. You were driving me insane.” He kissed me again, snaking his hand into my pants and gripping my tightly. My own arousal had been neglected for the entire time, and the sensation made me gasp. “Do you still want to take me? I could finish you right now...”

“No!” I nearly shouted, stopping his wandering hand before it did set me off. I've gotten this far, and I had no intention of stopping. If he wanted me to be more aggressive, that was what he was going to get, now that I was completely turned on by pleasing him.

Gripping both his shoulders, I looked him in the eye. “I want you...I want to be inside of you. The more I think about it, the...the...” I had to stop, think of the words and then say them without turning red again. I had to mean it. “The harder I get.”

With a keening moan, Nagisa nearly melted back on the bed, looking back with lidded eyes. I knew I had done something right. This whole “speaking up” thing wasn't too bad. Together we pulled his pants off and I returned the moan when he spread his legs for me. I was going to come without either one of use touching me if this kept up.

I covered my body with his, kissing him with all the passion I could muster. He responded in kind, our tongues gliding against each other. I could never get tired of kissing him. Our bodies moved against each other, grinding our lower halves, hands flowing over his naked and my still clothed skin. He murmured something that I didn't catch the first time.

“Hmm?”

“Lube, honey. Lubrication, KY, remember? We're going to need it if we're going anywhere further than this. I didn't exactly pack any with me, and unless you still have a tube in your school bag...”

Glare. “Hey, I took that one out after it fell out of my bag during P.E.” Too bad I couldn't tell the teacher that my sneaky horny uncle put it there just in case the mood struck us whenever he would drive me home from school. Did he really have to bring that up right now?

“I don't see why you're still upset about that. And I straightened it out with your gym teacher. I'm sure he believed me when I told him that I put it there accidentally, thinking it was my bag.”

I rolled my eyes. The problem with that is my teacher really didn't believe him and for months thought I was some kind of mad masturbater. “You just pick the strangest places for us to...”

“Hold that thought, Yukihito, I have an idea.” He leaned over the side of the bed to search the bedstand drawer. “Ah-ha! I knew it!” Smiling triumphantly, he showed me a familiar looking small bottle. “I guessed those two horndogs would keep something like this in just about every room of this house. Good thinking, honey. Sex in strange places, indeed.”

Crisis now over, I busied myself preparing him. This was something I had experience with from the other side, and with some instruction from Nagisa, I managed to work the slippery fluid inside his warm body with two fingers. I watched his face for any signs of pain, but all I got was the beautiful look of contentment. When my fingers brushed against his prostate, he jerked as if he was shocked, a “Yesss!” hissing from between his teeth. I wanted to hear that again.

Soon he was begging me. “Please, love. I can't take any more. I need you,” he groaned, shamelessly riding my hand. I couldn't get my pants down fast enough.

The moment the head of my cock slipped in I was lost in wet, hot, tight sensation. I was nearly done before I sheathed myself to the hilt, and stopped to gather my wits. If only I knew this was what he wanted some time ago, and how fantastic it would feel for me!

“Oh God, baby,” he purred, wrapping those long legs around my waist, “don't stop.” With a request like that, how could I refuse?

My first thrusts were slow, allowing myself to get used to the gripping sensation. That didn't take long and soon I was pounding into him, my face pressed into his neck. He hands were busy clutching my shoulders, scratching nails down my back, aiming my face for frantic kisses and holding me so very close. His mouth, when it wasn't sharing breaths with me murmured, encouraged, whispered, gasped and shouted. Most of my cries were muffled by his skin. We were as one, the movements the same as always, but the dynamics much different.

“Mine,” I managed to gasp into his ear. Mine, and no other will ever touch his heart the way I do. I staked my claim tonight.

“Yes..yes...yours, always-Nnnnn!” Nagisa tensed up, screaming my name, and I was surprised to feel the splash of his release on my chest. I wasn't even aware that he'd gotten hard again as we made love. The sudden tensing of his passage around me was my undoing and with a shout to match his I joined him.

For a moment, we lay in a sweaty tangle, still panting for air. I felt my hair being stroked and the sweetest endearments in my ear. If I had any question that I pleased him, it was all the answer I needed.

With his hair mussed and his make up mostly sweat away, Nagisa looked completely relaxed. And rumpled. Rumpled and relaxed. I couldn't help but smile as my brain tried to make complete thoughts all over again.

“I really hoped you enjoyed that, Yukihito, cause I think I want to do it over and over again. I've always hoped you'd take to this as well as you did.”

Still not trusting my brain to make an appropriate response, I kissed him, hoping that it was enough. Once we parted, he put a finger to my lips.

“Shh, listen...”

From the wall next to the headboard, we heard thumps, moans and other familiar sounds of the act we just completed.

“Looks like I'm not the only one impressed by your 'performance',” he said with a laugh, and I couldn't help but join in. Tonight started off as something horrible, but ended up with me sated in my lover's arms. I don't think I've ever been happier.

Well, there was one thing. One thing I had to get off my chest from our conversation. He had a fear that only my words could soothe. At least, that was what I was hoping as I got his attention once more.

“Nagisa, I'm not going anywhere, not now, not ever. I don't want to be anywhere else. I love you.”

His eyes filled with tears that spilled down his cheeks as he pulled me close again, his smiling lips seeking mine.

“I guess this means you're stuck with me as well, Yukihito.”

“By the way, next time we do this, I'm going to really tie you up if you can't keep your hands still.”

“Mmmm, really? That's not much of a deterrent, you know...”

I lowered my head to his chest, groaning. He's incorrigible, my Nagisa.


This whole “speaking up” thing wasn't too bad.