Endless Love

I couldn’t bear to live without you. I guess that’s why I did what I did.

As I felt the weight of your cold body in my arms, I couldn’t bear the crushing thought of being alone. I couldn’t stand going on living when I knew that you had suffered so much before death finally overtook you. I couldn’t stand to be left in this miserable world without you. I felt the warm heat of your blood. All of the love that you had felt for me, harbored for me, was seeping out of the wound in your body. I clamped my hand over it, trying to stop the red river of anguish that was gushing from inside you, that crimson ribbon that connected the two of us. Connected our hearts together.

I felt the hot tears washing my cheeks, I smelled the sickly-sweet tang of your blood. I could taste it on my tongue. I clung to your lifeless body, feeling the still warm press of your dark hair against my face. As I reached up to wipe away the tears, I felt the smear of your still warm blood across my cheeks. Our last embrace. Our final kiss.

I did not feel the hard wood of the blade as I drew it from the sheath and carefully laid the scabbard aside, never truly looking at the blade, never truly feeling the weight of the weapon in my grip. I wrapped the knife in the piece of paper that you had clutched in your hand. Your last love letter to me. I didn’t want to live on this earth any longer. Destined to read those last few lines over and over until I too expired.

Taking my last look at you, my eyes drinking their fill for one final time, I plunged the blade into my stomach. I lurched, feeling the dizzying pain spreading throughout my entire body. My breath caught in my throat, mouth filling with blood. I opened my mouth, but no noise came out. Only that crimson river that connected us. I tried to bite back the pain that was welling up inside me. I could feel the blood dripping out across my hand. My fingers clutched instinctively around the blade. I could feel the hand holding you up begin to quiver, my strength was leaving me, the red love that connected us in life was gushing from my body, staining yours pure. As I collapsed against you, my last ounce of strength I used to rest my head on your chest, cold now in death.

I knew at that very moment that we were finally together again. I no longer had to bear living in this world without you. I sucked in a ragged breath, feeling my life slipping away, my heart flying towards yours. We were finally able to be together again, joined in death. Sweet, cruel and merciful death that took you away from me so suddenly, but also joined us together in eternity.

I thought that I could hear your heart beat for me one last time.