The Depravity of Suzumiya Haruhi

The Depravity of Suzumiya Haruhi

Warning: Starts off really dark. Trust me, it gets brighter. And weirder.

Content: All sex depicted here is consentual. M/F.
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I sit in the club room as usual, just basking in the lack of opression that I enjoyed. This being a complaint of Koizumi, not Haruhi.

The esper can be a powerful annoyance, and has a demented lack of respect for personal space -- especially mine. Take for example, the present moment.

For reasons I don't entirely understand, once Haruhi left, the esper kept me behind in the clubroom, Asahina-san and Nagato remaining with him. He began another one of his long, painful diatribes about philosophy and nonsense, which went on for some time.

If Nagato and Asahina-san hadn't been there, I would not have put up with as much of it as I did. The esper was growing increasingly frustrated as time dragged on -- I would probably have complained, if he didn't look so determined, so earnest....

Eventually, Nagato finally turned to him and explained, "Ultimately, you cannot optimize his reaction or treatment -- she is not prepared for him to realize her feelings, and so, he is not capable."

The esper finally shuts up.

In the blessed silence, Asahina-san sighs, stepping close and placing a comforting hand on my shoulder, though I'm not certain why.

"Well, fuck," Koizumi grumbles, surprising me with his directness. "I guess there's nothing for it, then."

He walked away with no further explanation. Asahina-san looked at me with an unreadable expression, then gave me a wistful smile, shaking her head and blinking away mysterious moisture.

Huh?

Nagato stayed behind, just watching me, and I felt too bewildered to follow Asahina-san before the smaller girl spoke.

"I have extended certain manipulations of my own to insure the best possible outcome," she assured me quietly.

Well ... I have no idea what you're talking about -- or what's going on, this time -- but I'm willing to take your word for it. Whatever it is, I can go into it confidently, I guess. Except for how Mikuru looked worried, anyway....

Nagato doesn't smile, but a little bit, she looked satisfied with that. Good enough, I guess.

***

The next day, in an unexpected but neat inversion, Haruhi sends the others home and orders me to wait. Mystified by this, I obediently remain in my seat, watching her with curiosity. The others leave, Nagato closing the door behind her, and then I watch Haruhi's form. In the winter of this, our second year, the clubroom is already filled with the late afternoon glow -- evening isn't far away.

The sun makes the girl before me glow, momentarily overpowering the overhead lamps.

She turns her head, her hair swinging, revealing the pale skin of her neck briefly. Her pearly teeth glint, her chocolate eyes flash. Sensuous lips curl into an amused quirk as she announces, "Let's fuck."

Yeah, that--

Wait, _what_?

I clutch the table before me keep from falling out of my seat in alarm. It takes me a minute, but I actually manage a grin back at her. "You.... Aheh, you.... You got me," I allow, nodding. "What's this really about?"

Her smile fades, and she raises her hands to her hips, leaning forward and giving me a frown. "I mean," she says with slow deliberation, "that I think we've known each-other long enough to stop kidding around. I want to make it clear that there's a reason I don't want you straying -- alright?"

I realized suddenly that this was her demented interpetation of telling me that she wanted me to be her boyfriend. I ... kind of saw this coming. The delivery, however ... for all of my expectations and my defenses, Haruhi's style came in behind all of my lines, casually obliterating weak points. Just like she always does, I guess.

"D...did ... you want to build up to that?" I choke out, blinking as she slowly stalks towards me, her hands smoothing her skirt across her hips as she gives me a hungry, knowing smirk.

"We've had more than a year of that," she dismisses. "I've told you before, you know ... even I sometimes get those urges." Now she's right before me, her chest near my face, her hands coming away from her body to rest on my shoulders, toyingly tracing their way down. "You've been loyal enough to me, you know ... and I'm not going to be some stupid, tsundere bitch forever. I want it, and I'm pretty sure...." She twists herself to one side, sliding her rear into my lap, grinding herself carefully across my crotch, her eyes never leaving mine for a heartbeat as she turns around, and with her typicaly insane acrobatic skill, manages to straddle my hips, pinning me to the chair and leaving her groin pressing against mine.

Her thighs are gripping my midsection, and her hands are clinging to my shoulders, her body pulled and pressed tightly to mine. "Yeah," she decides, feeling my reaction to her agressive intimacy, "you want it, too. Now, I'm on the pill, so, you're clean, right?"

"Of course!" I manage, somewhat indignantly, my hands wrapping around Haruhi's waist. "What kind of-- W...wait, you really want to go through with this?"

She grinds against my forming erection in response, hitching one eyebrow the slightest bit higher.

Well ... why the hell not?

I feel a bit cheated that it's entirely on her terms, and maybe it makes me sound less of a man, but I'd hoped it would actually be a bit more romantic than this, too. But then again, what should I really expect from Haruhi?

I suppose the important thing is that we connect through this ... and, well, I am a healthy young man. It's not like the idea hasn't enticed me before!

My hands rise to hold her against me in the chair, which is not where I would have chosen, but it's where we are for the moment. I press my lips to Haruhi's, and am almost instantly overwhelmed by her-- Her tongue darts into my mouth without hesitation, engaging my own; my head tilts back as she levers herself up slightly, one of her hands snaking between us and shooting down to my crotch. To my amazement, it seems like it takes her less than a second to unzip my pants and free my throbbing erection.

A few seconds after that, before I'm prepared, she's already whisked her underwear to one side -- and with shocking suddeness, impaled herself on my length with no more than a muffled grunt of satisfaction, released into the kiss she shared with me. I had no idea what to expect -- this was my first sexual experience that didn't involve my right hand and one of those few rare weekends when I could use the shower without my family around.

Haruhi's inner depths were warm, and slick -- I felt ... overwhelmed, so frantic and worried over what the sensations I _should_ be feeling were like....

The dumbest things go through your mind at the worst possible times. Take for instance, me. A girl you like, for the first time in over a year decides to increase how intimate she is with you. You start having sex, and only once you've penetrated her does it cross your mind to wonder, 'Is my dick even wired right?'

I blame my deviant, wandering mind, but -- in my confusion and immediacy, I came instantly, while Haruhi was pulling her face back, drawing in a deep breath from breaking our kiss.

She stared at me for a moment, looking slightly confused, then disbelieving. Nearly a full minute went by, with my previously hardened length wilting within her, and she began to snicker. "R...really?" she chuckled. "That's.... Hah!" She shook her head, laughing and pulling herself off me to stand on the floor.

My face feels like it's about to melt from the heat.

She snickers again. "Just as well," she decides, shrugging. "I don't want to stain my uniform." With that, she begins undressing before me. After her blouse is off, as she's reaching behind her back for her bra-strap, she raises an eyebrow and prompts me, "Well?"

Shaken by that warning, and eager to try this again -- seriously, without embarassing myself like that, this time -- I strip off my clothes. Shortly, both of us are naked, and she gives me an apraising look. The sight of her nude body is enough to arouse me again as I stare like an idiot, drinking in her beauty.

Her breasts aren't as large as Asahina-san's, but they're by no means undesirable -- for a girl as athletic as she is, they're remarkable, quite possibly even perfect. Her lips are curved in a smile ... not quite her sinister, 'I'm up to something' smile, but not her wholly welcoming, 'I care about my Brigade members' smile, either. It's the one between them, which, well, since she's been mentioned ... Haruhi uses mostly on Asahina-san.

That's actually kind of flattering, in a scary way.

She spares a moment of practicality to throw down a towel from the locker in the corner, then leads me by my hand, pulling me down to the floor. "Alright," she coaxes me, grinning as she lies on her back, legs spread, and I kneel between them.

She pulls me to her, but before she can guide me into her -- my length twitching excitedly even at her touch -- I protest, "W...wait!"

"What?" she demands impatiently, still smiling. "What is it?"

"Um ... I.... I just...." I swallow. But then, if we're this far, then, why not? I can't do this without saying it, anyway. "Um, Haruhi ... I love you."

Her smile widens. "I know," she says, overriding my strength and pulling me to her, one hand guiding me as her legs wrap around and pull me all the way into her. "Oooh~!" she coos. "There we go~!"

Slightly more prepared, my length is sensitive to her molten depths, the slick yet firm grip she had on my member, rythmically pulsing up and down my length. Shakily, uncertain of what to do precisely, but feeling the urge deep in some primal part of my brain that understood perfectly, I draw my hips back and plunge into her again. She bucks against me with a satisfied grunt, her legs tightening and encouragining a steady drive.

I feel an intense pressure building from deep in my gut, tingling towards my balls from the first thrust -- by the dozenth, I realize, "I'm going to come," in a panic.

"What?" Haruhi murmurs? "Huh? No--"

But it's a bit too late; she's too much for me, and I feel an astounding release as that pressure explodes out of my balls in a powerful spurt, leaving me feeling as through I'd run a marathon. Our souls touched for an instant, I thought; I could feel all of the joy, hope ... everything connecting us. The year and more we'd spent together, finally culminating in this....

Well, I suddenly understood what all the fuss was about.

A minute or two later, when I can see straight and breathe again, Haruhi heaves an explosive sigh in my ear-- I hastily roll off her. "S...sorry," I stammer. How thoughtless of me; did I crush her?

But she doesn't look hurt, just angry....

"D...did I do something wrong?" I wonder.

"You're just awful in bed," she tells me in response, sitting up to look at me with annoyance, crossing her arms beneath her chest. "God ... that was pathetic!"

I feel my heart stop. "I ... I thought.... B...but...."

"I'll grant, it's not the worst I've had, but really," she grumbles, yanking the towel from beneath me and wiping herself off, turning quickly to her discarded clothing.

I'm sitting there on the floor, naked, feeling like an idiot. "W...worst?" I mumble.

"Seriously, Kyon -- that's the kind of thing I expect from a loser like Taniguchi ... quick on the trigger twice, though?" She sighs, pulling on her underwear.

I feel my eyes tear as I look up at her, and I slowly pitch forward onto hands and knees, fumbling for my clothes and incidentally hiding my face from her sight. "H...how many ... of the guys that you went out with did you...?" I can't even bring myself to finish asking.

"Most of 'em," she answers in distraction, fixing her blouse as I turn away and pull on my boxer shorts. "And ... yeah, there were some that were worse than that -- but ugh. Not a whole lot."

She keeps talking, but I don't really hear it. I just get dressed and think about all of the things that Koizumi told me. That everyone else told me. That Haruhi can destroy the world if she doesn't get her way. That I have a certain responsibility to her.

And somehow ... I had fallen in love with her and thought myself an equal, but that casual emasculation made it clear that I was no more than a toy. I wish I could say I was strong enough that even emasculated, I'd continue, but really ... that was one of the few things I had that Haruhi didn't try to take away, or otherwise force me to adjust. If anything, she even expected it of me -- that I be a 'pervert'.

I don't remember much more than mumbling a farewell, trying to stay as polite as I could before I left.

I didn't remember the walk home. Talking to my family.

Dinner.

I just thought about what it all meant. I was a toy for Haruhi ... and I wasn't good enough to make her happy.

I'd been sad before. I'd been despirited. It's probably stupid. Rationality should win out over ... well.

At the end of the day, though ... I can't live with that. The best compromise ... lie, if I've got to -- do the best for the world?

Haruhi calls me an idiot all the time. Idiot.

Heh.

Maybe that's true after all.

But what I really am ... is a coward. I don't really plan it, either. I just kind of ... do it. There's the closet ... there's a belt....

There's....

Th...er...e....

Th...e....

....

...wha....